The Keeper of Lost Causes by Jussi Adler-Olsen

toilets. They were probably also the last ones on the sun deck. At any rate, the two men over by the big picture windows were gone when she and Uffe passed by. She had nodded to the waitress who came out of the cafeteria, and she’d seen a couple of kids punch the door opener before disappearing below deck. Nothing else. She hadn’t noticed anyone coming that close to her. Her only thought had been that Uffe needed to hurry up and come out of the bathroom.
    Oh God, Uffe! What had happened to him? He was so unhappy after he’d hit her. And he’d been so dismayed that his baseball cap was gone. There were still red patches on his cheeks when he went into the toilet. So what kind of shape could he be in by now?
    She heard a click from above that made her cringe. Then she quickly fumbled her way over to the corner with the arched door. She had to be ready if someone came in. Then there was another click, and her heart felt as if it might hammer apart. Only when the fan overhead started up did she realize she could relax a little. The clicking sound must have come from some sort of relay switch.
    She stretched toward the warm air; it was life-giving. What else did she have to cling to?
    And she remained standing there like that until the fan stopped, leaving her with the feeling that the warm air might be her only contact with the outside world. She closed her eyes tight and made herself concentrate so that the sobs trying to force their way out would be kept at bay.
    It was a terrible thought. But maybe it was true. Maybe she’d be left here for all eternity. Hidden away to die. And nobody knew where she was; even she didn’t know. It could be anywhere. Several hours’ drive from the ferryboat landing. In Denmark or Germany, anywhere at all. Maybe even farther away than that.
    And with death slowly emerging as the likely end to this whole scenario, she imagined the weapon that thirst and hunger would aim at her. The lingering death, in which her body would short-circuit bit by bit, the relay switches of self-preservation shutting down one after the other. And at last the apathetic, ultimate slumber that would set her free.
    There aren’t many people who will miss me, she thought. Uffe, of course. He would miss her. Poor, poor Uffe. But she’d never let anyone but her brother get close to her. She’d locked out everyone else and caged herself in.
    She tried very hard to hold back the tears, but without success. Was this really what life had held for her? Was it going to end like this? Without children, without happiness, without having a chance to realize all that she’d dreamed of doing during the years she was alone with Uffe? Without being able to fulfill the obligation that she’d taken on ever since her parents died?
    It was a bitter, depressing feeling, and infinitely lonely. That was why she now heard herself sobbing quietly.
    She was overwhelmed by the awareness that Uffe would be all alone in the world, and she imagined that this was the most terrible thing that could happen to her. For a long time it filled her consciousness completely. She was going to die alone, like an animal, silently and unaccounted for, while Uffe and everyone else would have to live on without knowing. And when she had exhausted all her tears, it occurred to her that maybe this wasn’t over yet. And things might get worse. She could be in for a cruel death. She might have been relegated to a fate so horrible that death would come as a relief. But first she might have to endure pain and bestiality. She’d heard all about such things. Exploitation, rape, and torture. Maybe eyes were watching her right now. Cameras with infrared sensors observing her through the glass. Eyes that meant to harm her. Ears that were listening.
    She looked toward the glass panes and tried to appear calm.
    “Please, have mercy on me,” she whispered softly into the darkness.
     

15. 2007
     
    A Peugeot 607 is considered to be a relatively quiet vehicle, but