attend university?
—Yes. Both of us.
—Was it the university of your choice?
—I was not an exceptional student. I had no grand designs.
—And your husband?
—He has a good head for academics. He had wanted to study history.
—He wasn’t accepted?
—Not into that faculty.
—How come?
—What do you mean how come? Look at his nose.
Alec had landed in the briefing department after a brisk evaluation by Matilda Levy. She had walked him through the HIAS offices while rattling off the various positions and personalities.
—Konstantin is our messenger, Matilda said when they passed the table reserved for the messenger. He is going to Canada. After one month he could find his way without the aid of a map not only in Ostia and Ladispoli, but also in Rome.
At the doors of the transportation department, a room that smelled strongly of body odor, cigarettes, and fried food, Matilda Levy introduced Alec to three of the four men who worked there. They looked up from their particular stacks of documents and submitted to the introduction in a cursory way, disguising not at all their displeasure at having to engage in the formality of greeting a superfluous person. The fourth man, Matilda explained, was at the dockyards coordinating the movement of freight. The slightest mistake and you had disaster—a family lands in New York but their dining room set lands in Melbourne.
—You do not seem to me an imposing man, Matilda said.
—Imposing? Alec asked, not understanding.
—A man to give orders to other men, Matilda said. No, they would eat you alive on the docks.
As neither the docks nor the musty office held any appeal for him, Alec saw no reason to contest Matilda’s perception of him. Besides, she was essentially right. His father was imposing and enjoyed issuing decrees and orders. Karl had this capacity as well, although hedidn’t derive the kind of pleasure from it that their father did. Whereas the only thing Alec detested more than being ordered around was having to order someone else around. Basically, he was of the opinion that the world would be a far more interesting and hospitable place if everyone—genius and idiot alike—was allowed to bumble along as he pleased. “More freedom to bumble” neatly described his motive for leaving the Soviet Union.
—You are the type that prefers the company of women, Matilda Levy said as they stepped away from the Transportation Department. Is this correct?
They stopped in the hallway and Matilda Levy peered boldly into Alec’s eyes, squinting slightly as if in this way to achieve a better vantage into his innermost character.
—Yes, it is correct. I have always preferred the company of women, Alec said and, after hesitating one instant too long, smiled.
The smile, Alec immediately felt, was a mistake. Under Matilda Levy’s peculiar scrutiny and under the demands of a foreign language, he had momentarily been unable to act like himself. He had intended only to deliver a simple statement in the English language and season it with a little charm but had instead, because of the yawning gap between his words and his smile, presented for Matilda Levy’s consideration a man who was either licentious or deranged or some combination of the two.
Matilda Levy seemed to regard him ruminatively.
—Yes, she said, I believe it is so.
Alec wasn’t sure what she meant: What was so? He had temporarily lost track of what they had been talking about. Matilda Levy appeared before him transformed, as though she had stepped out from behind some scrim that had been obscuring a more vital Matilda Levy. Alec sensed that she was now differently disposed to him. They were no longer administrator and prospective employee, but rather woman and man—with complementary desires and bodies. For Alec’s consideration Matilda Levy presented the physical Matilda Levy: hips, breasts, legs, hairdo—adorned with nylons, necklaces, bracelets, bulky rings, and lipstick.
Saying nothing
—Yes. Both of us.
—Was it the university of your choice?
—I was not an exceptional student. I had no grand designs.
—And your husband?
—He has a good head for academics. He had wanted to study history.
—He wasn’t accepted?
—Not into that faculty.
—How come?
—What do you mean how come? Look at his nose.
Alec had landed in the briefing department after a brisk evaluation by Matilda Levy. She had walked him through the HIAS offices while rattling off the various positions and personalities.
—Konstantin is our messenger, Matilda said when they passed the table reserved for the messenger. He is going to Canada. After one month he could find his way without the aid of a map not only in Ostia and Ladispoli, but also in Rome.
At the doors of the transportation department, a room that smelled strongly of body odor, cigarettes, and fried food, Matilda Levy introduced Alec to three of the four men who worked there. They looked up from their particular stacks of documents and submitted to the introduction in a cursory way, disguising not at all their displeasure at having to engage in the formality of greeting a superfluous person. The fourth man, Matilda explained, was at the dockyards coordinating the movement of freight. The slightest mistake and you had disaster—a family lands in New York but their dining room set lands in Melbourne.
—You do not seem to me an imposing man, Matilda said.
—Imposing? Alec asked, not understanding.
—A man to give orders to other men, Matilda said. No, they would eat you alive on the docks.
As neither the docks nor the musty office held any appeal for him, Alec saw no reason to contest Matilda’s perception of him. Besides, she was essentially right. His father was imposing and enjoyed issuing decrees and orders. Karl had this capacity as well, although hedidn’t derive the kind of pleasure from it that their father did. Whereas the only thing Alec detested more than being ordered around was having to order someone else around. Basically, he was of the opinion that the world would be a far more interesting and hospitable place if everyone—genius and idiot alike—was allowed to bumble along as he pleased. “More freedom to bumble” neatly described his motive for leaving the Soviet Union.
—You are the type that prefers the company of women, Matilda Levy said as they stepped away from the Transportation Department. Is this correct?
They stopped in the hallway and Matilda Levy peered boldly into Alec’s eyes, squinting slightly as if in this way to achieve a better vantage into his innermost character.
—Yes, it is correct. I have always preferred the company of women, Alec said and, after hesitating one instant too long, smiled.
The smile, Alec immediately felt, was a mistake. Under Matilda Levy’s peculiar scrutiny and under the demands of a foreign language, he had momentarily been unable to act like himself. He had intended only to deliver a simple statement in the English language and season it with a little charm but had instead, because of the yawning gap between his words and his smile, presented for Matilda Levy’s consideration a man who was either licentious or deranged or some combination of the two.
Matilda Levy seemed to regard him ruminatively.
—Yes, she said, I believe it is so.
Alec wasn’t sure what she meant: What was so? He had temporarily lost track of what they had been talking about. Matilda Levy appeared before him transformed, as though she had stepped out from behind some scrim that had been obscuring a more vital Matilda Levy. Alec sensed that she was now differently disposed to him. They were no longer administrator and prospective employee, but rather woman and man—with complementary desires and bodies. For Alec’s consideration Matilda Levy presented the physical Matilda Levy: hips, breasts, legs, hairdo—adorned with nylons, necklaces, bracelets, bulky rings, and lipstick.
Saying nothing
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