friend like you since high school, Lily.”
Lily couldn’t help feeling pleased by her friend’s words. Yet years of suspicion and guilt kept her from confiding in Clara. She felt too ashamed. No doubt Clara would recoil with shock if Lily told her all the things she’d done in the past.
“Look, I don’t mean to pry,” Clara said. “I’m certainly not in a position to judge others. You might as well know that Michael and I…we had to get married, Lily. I’ve been where you are. I just wanted you to know you’re not alone.”
Lily’s mouth dropped open in surprise. Clara’s admission brought the burn of tears to Lily’s eyes. To actually meet someone who knew what she was going through eased the leaden weight in her chest just a bit. But she guessed that Michael hadn’t ever beat up Clara. And he hadn’t lied about being married to someone else. He’d loved her and made her his wife. And that’s where Lily and Clara differed.
“I…I wish I could say getting pregnant out of wedlock was the only difficult thing I’ve done in my life.” The confession was hard for Lily to make.
Clara shrugged. “Like I said, I’m not about to judge you when I’ve got so many skeletons in my own closet.”
Really? Did Lily dare believe her friend? Maybe she could find companionship and acceptance here in Jasper after all, if only until she had her baby.
“There is life after an unwed pregnancy,” Clara said. “Michael and I made a mistake, but then we made it right. I can see you’re trying to do the same.”
Lily wondered if it was possible to ever make her life right again.
“Your life isn’t over, Lily. And neither is your baby’s. It’s just beginning.”
How Lily wished this was true. From where she was sitting, she could hardly believe it, although she wanted to. Very much. “Thanks, Clara. I appreciate your support. More than I can say.”
“Good, because I want us to be friends again. Close friends, like we used to be back in high school.”
Lily gave an uncertain nod. “I’d like that. Very much.”
“To start off with, I’d like to throw you a baby shower.”
Lily swallowed a gasp. “No, Clara. Please don’t.”
“Why not? It’s a great way to get the things you’ll need for the baby. And you need a fun party, too.”
Lily bit her bottom lip. Then, taking a small leap of faith, she explained about her indecision in keeping the baby. “So you can see why I can’t let you throw me a baby shower. It would just make my decision more difficult.”
Clara nodded, her expression sad. “Yes, I do understand and I respect your wishes. I can’t tell you what to do, Lily. But I can say that children are a blessing. Hands full when they’re young and hearts full once they’re raised.”
Lily thought this over for several moments. “I believe you’re right. But I may simply be the incubator for someone else’s daughter. I know my body has made this sweet little baby, but she may not belong to me. The Lord may want her to go to another family who’ll love and raise her as their own.”
This thought brought Lily deep, abiding sadness. How could having a child bring her so much misery, yet give so much joy to an adoptive family?
“Have you contacted an adoption agency yet?”
“No.” She’d have to do that soon, but she dreaded it.
“I have a request,” Clara said. “You remember I wanted to ask you a question. Knowing you, you’re going to try to stay hidden out here at Emerald Ranch until the baby’s born and I can’t let that happen. You’re back home now and I think you need to laugh now and then.”
Lily couldn’t remember the last time she’d really laughed. Happiness seemed such an alien emotion anymore. “What did you have in mind?”
“I’m the co-chair of the Jasper Rodeo Committee and I’d like your help,” Clara said.
“What?” Never in a million years would Lily have suspected such a request.
Clara shrugged. “Let’s face it, you were always
Lily couldn’t help feeling pleased by her friend’s words. Yet years of suspicion and guilt kept her from confiding in Clara. She felt too ashamed. No doubt Clara would recoil with shock if Lily told her all the things she’d done in the past.
“Look, I don’t mean to pry,” Clara said. “I’m certainly not in a position to judge others. You might as well know that Michael and I…we had to get married, Lily. I’ve been where you are. I just wanted you to know you’re not alone.”
Lily’s mouth dropped open in surprise. Clara’s admission brought the burn of tears to Lily’s eyes. To actually meet someone who knew what she was going through eased the leaden weight in her chest just a bit. But she guessed that Michael hadn’t ever beat up Clara. And he hadn’t lied about being married to someone else. He’d loved her and made her his wife. And that’s where Lily and Clara differed.
“I…I wish I could say getting pregnant out of wedlock was the only difficult thing I’ve done in my life.” The confession was hard for Lily to make.
Clara shrugged. “Like I said, I’m not about to judge you when I’ve got so many skeletons in my own closet.”
Really? Did Lily dare believe her friend? Maybe she could find companionship and acceptance here in Jasper after all, if only until she had her baby.
“There is life after an unwed pregnancy,” Clara said. “Michael and I made a mistake, but then we made it right. I can see you’re trying to do the same.”
Lily wondered if it was possible to ever make her life right again.
“Your life isn’t over, Lily. And neither is your baby’s. It’s just beginning.”
How Lily wished this was true. From where she was sitting, she could hardly believe it, although she wanted to. Very much. “Thanks, Clara. I appreciate your support. More than I can say.”
“Good, because I want us to be friends again. Close friends, like we used to be back in high school.”
Lily gave an uncertain nod. “I’d like that. Very much.”
“To start off with, I’d like to throw you a baby shower.”
Lily swallowed a gasp. “No, Clara. Please don’t.”
“Why not? It’s a great way to get the things you’ll need for the baby. And you need a fun party, too.”
Lily bit her bottom lip. Then, taking a small leap of faith, she explained about her indecision in keeping the baby. “So you can see why I can’t let you throw me a baby shower. It would just make my decision more difficult.”
Clara nodded, her expression sad. “Yes, I do understand and I respect your wishes. I can’t tell you what to do, Lily. But I can say that children are a blessing. Hands full when they’re young and hearts full once they’re raised.”
Lily thought this over for several moments. “I believe you’re right. But I may simply be the incubator for someone else’s daughter. I know my body has made this sweet little baby, but she may not belong to me. The Lord may want her to go to another family who’ll love and raise her as their own.”
This thought brought Lily deep, abiding sadness. How could having a child bring her so much misery, yet give so much joy to an adoptive family?
“Have you contacted an adoption agency yet?”
“No.” She’d have to do that soon, but she dreaded it.
“I have a request,” Clara said. “You remember I wanted to ask you a question. Knowing you, you’re going to try to stay hidden out here at Emerald Ranch until the baby’s born and I can’t let that happen. You’re back home now and I think you need to laugh now and then.”
Lily couldn’t remember the last time she’d really laughed. Happiness seemed such an alien emotion anymore. “What did you have in mind?”
“I’m the co-chair of the Jasper Rodeo Committee and I’d like your help,” Clara said.
“What?” Never in a million years would Lily have suspected such a request.
Clara shrugged. “Let’s face it, you were always
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