The Five-Minute Marriage by Joan Aiken Page B

and myself can be aware of the substitution. When I have seen her, it has always been in Bath. I was about, Miss Carteret, to express my gratitude to you for what must—what must without doubt have been a bizarre, if not a most distressing, most repugnant affair. I beg that you will now do your best to put it completely out of your mind and memory. ”
    “ I am quite sure you do! ” she answered rather tartly. “ Has it occurred to you, Mr. Penistone, that in your anxiety to pull the wool over your uncle ’ s eyes, you have now placed yourself in a somewhat perilous position in regard to me ?”
    “ How do you mean, ma ’ am? ” he said stiffly.
    “ Why, suppose I were of extortionate turn of mind? Suppose I were not to be content with a mere pittance of an annuity to my mother, but were to demand, on her behalf, a fairer share of the family fortune? Suppose I threatened to make this business public? Or even to inform your uncle—should he not immediately die? ”
    His face, which had begun to appear more relaxed, and even show some traces of friendliness, now stiffened into its former mask of cold dislike.
    “ I might have known it! ” he muttered to himself, and to her. “ How can I tell what you will be at, madam? When one is in straits, one employs such tools as come to hand. But may I point out that the story will hardly redound to your own credit, if you choose to let it out. Do your worst, however; we shall fight you with what weapons we may. ”
    “ Oh, do not put yourself about, sir, ” she replied lightly and coldly. “ I was only funning, I assure you! Like you, being in straits, I did what I could to secure my poor parent a small competence. I shall be entirely satisfied and shall not, I daresay, ever have the least wish to recollect the disagreeable means that we were forced to adopt in order to achieve the desired end. I only wondered at the risks you were prepared to run without, apparently, considering them. Set your mind at rest, however, Mr. Penistone! You are by far more likely to do me harm. Suppose it should get about to the parents of my pupils that I had compromised myself by suffering myself to be employed in such a masquerade—how many people do you imagine would then continue to employ me as a music teacher? ”
    “ A music teacher? ” he said. “ Is that what you are? ”
    He sounded so astonished that she raised her brows.
    “ Why, what had you taken me to be, Mr. Penistone? ”
    “ I?—I do not know; I had not given the matter much thought, ” he was beginning rather confusedly, when Cowley came back into the room with champagne, glasses, and an ice bucket. At the same moment Jenny came running in, followed more slowly by Mr. Fitzjohn. Jenny bounded up to Philadelphia and gave her another warm embrace.
    “ Mrs. Penistone! ” she said, laughing, “ Well, did you ever? Isn ’ t this famous! I was never so ready to burst in all my life as when Mr. Fitz here asked if I’ d be so good as to step upstairs to witness a wedding! Lord, Lord, if I’ d ever a guessed that was how the day would end! You could have knocked me down with a feather! A wedding? says I. Pray whose wedding did you have in mind? Little thinking— ”
    As Cowley handed her a glass, Philadelphia gave her an anxious glance, and murmured in her ear, “ Hush, now, Jenny! I will explain all to you later! ”
    “ Well, no matter! ” said Jenny, raising her glass. “ A long life to you both, and a gallon of happiness to every dram of trouble! ”
    “ I second that wish, ” said Mr. Fitzjohn quietly, raising his glass. “ My felicitations, Gareth! Madam, your health! ”
    “ Thank you! ” said Philadelphia coolly. “ Sir! ” She raised her glass to Mr. Penistone, who met her look with one so impassive that she could only infer that it concealed a very great many inner preoccupations. Fleetingly, she wondered what occupied his thoughts.
    “ Supper is ready whenever you want it, ” announced Fitzjohn,