that she just stared for a moment. Then she heard a noise and her heart went crazy – he was here!
But no, it was a woman’s voice, raspy with smoke, belting out, ‘Liam! Watch the bleeding stairs!’ It was Jacinta from upstairs trailing her boy by the hand, while trying to lift her little girl’s pushchair down the stairs at the same time. No lift in this building and they put the family on the fourth floor. Sometimes Keisha thought these men who ran things could do with trying to lift a baby and shopping and a kid and a buggy up four flights of stairs. ‘Want a hand?’
Jacinta gave her a suspicious look through red-rimmed eyes, then jerked her chin, making her high pony-tail fly up. ‘Get the wheels.’
Keisha picked up the spinning bottom wheels, and panting, the little boy all the while about to fall and crack his bloody head, they got downstairs.
‘You seen Chris?’ she said as she put the buggy down, quickly, ashamed to have to ask.
Jacinta paused to take a packet of Silk Cut out of her pink cropped combats. ‘Kicked you out, did he?’
Keisha shrugged. ‘Had a row.’
‘Me and my Keith, we fight like cats and dogs some nights. But he don’t ever do that to me.’ She nodded to Keisha’s cracked face. ‘Listen, love. We all heard the racket – whole building did. Nearly called the boys in blue. So Keith up and asks him next day, Is your missus OK?’ She lit the cigarette, inhaling. ‘And he turns round and says, Ain’t got a missus. Then he comes up real close to Keith, all scary, and he goes, If she comes round, you better fucking tell me. Else I’ll come after you too.’ She dragged deeply on her fag. ‘If I were you, love, I’d get off sharpish. He’s bad news, that fella.’
Keisha’s stomach was heaving. What was she, thick? He’d banged her head off the table and she came back for more, thinking they could just go back to Happy Families or whatever it was they’d been.
Keisha turned to leave, almost running to get away, but Jacinta called her back. ‘Oi,’ she said. ‘Where’s that little ’un of yours. She safe?’ Everyone in the building knew what had happened to Ruby.
Ruby . Suddenly Keisha’s feelings sank down to an even worse level, and it felt like something heavy was sitting on her chest. She couldn’t breathe for a minute. She’d never thought of it, ’cos he was never interested in the kid. But if he wanted to get back at Keisha . . . What if all the time she’d been hiding in the fucking hostel, he was . . . Oh, fuck.
Setting off at a run to the bus stop, she fumbled for the blonde girl’s purse and took out the Oyster card. Surely the girl wouldn’t mind her using a bit for the bus. Not when it was this big a fucking deal.
Charlotte
She had to admit she was grateful her mother and Phil had come, if only because they’d left her enough food to eke out for nearly the whole first week. But eventually she’d eaten even the manky Bran Flakes and all the food in the freezer and she’d been having her tea black for days. It suited her mood, dark and bitter.
On the Friday – the day before what would have been her wedding – Charlotte was going crazy. She couldn’t sleep, couldn’t focus on the stupid burbling TV, hadn’t so far dared to pick up the phone or go online. It was only hiding from that onslaught of pity, that tsunami of sorry, that was keeping her on her feet, and she knew it. Her thoughts were sliding back and forth like a low-slung pendulum – eat, TV, sleep – and that was where they needed to stay. But now she was twitching with loneliness, standing up, sitting down, waiting for the kettle to boil, then coming to and realising she’d been there for ages and the water had cooled. To make matters worse she knew there were hundreds of things to do. She had already started four different letters to Dan’s parents, asking them to help her find a lawyer, and abandoned them all. They weren’t answering the phone.
Charlotte pulled her
But no, it was a woman’s voice, raspy with smoke, belting out, ‘Liam! Watch the bleeding stairs!’ It was Jacinta from upstairs trailing her boy by the hand, while trying to lift her little girl’s pushchair down the stairs at the same time. No lift in this building and they put the family on the fourth floor. Sometimes Keisha thought these men who ran things could do with trying to lift a baby and shopping and a kid and a buggy up four flights of stairs. ‘Want a hand?’
Jacinta gave her a suspicious look through red-rimmed eyes, then jerked her chin, making her high pony-tail fly up. ‘Get the wheels.’
Keisha picked up the spinning bottom wheels, and panting, the little boy all the while about to fall and crack his bloody head, they got downstairs.
‘You seen Chris?’ she said as she put the buggy down, quickly, ashamed to have to ask.
Jacinta paused to take a packet of Silk Cut out of her pink cropped combats. ‘Kicked you out, did he?’
Keisha shrugged. ‘Had a row.’
‘Me and my Keith, we fight like cats and dogs some nights. But he don’t ever do that to me.’ She nodded to Keisha’s cracked face. ‘Listen, love. We all heard the racket – whole building did. Nearly called the boys in blue. So Keith up and asks him next day, Is your missus OK?’ She lit the cigarette, inhaling. ‘And he turns round and says, Ain’t got a missus. Then he comes up real close to Keith, all scary, and he goes, If she comes round, you better fucking tell me. Else I’ll come after you too.’ She dragged deeply on her fag. ‘If I were you, love, I’d get off sharpish. He’s bad news, that fella.’
Keisha’s stomach was heaving. What was she, thick? He’d banged her head off the table and she came back for more, thinking they could just go back to Happy Families or whatever it was they’d been.
Keisha turned to leave, almost running to get away, but Jacinta called her back. ‘Oi,’ she said. ‘Where’s that little ’un of yours. She safe?’ Everyone in the building knew what had happened to Ruby.
Ruby . Suddenly Keisha’s feelings sank down to an even worse level, and it felt like something heavy was sitting on her chest. She couldn’t breathe for a minute. She’d never thought of it, ’cos he was never interested in the kid. But if he wanted to get back at Keisha . . . What if all the time she’d been hiding in the fucking hostel, he was . . . Oh, fuck.
Setting off at a run to the bus stop, she fumbled for the blonde girl’s purse and took out the Oyster card. Surely the girl wouldn’t mind her using a bit for the bus. Not when it was this big a fucking deal.
Charlotte
She had to admit she was grateful her mother and Phil had come, if only because they’d left her enough food to eke out for nearly the whole first week. But eventually she’d eaten even the manky Bran Flakes and all the food in the freezer and she’d been having her tea black for days. It suited her mood, dark and bitter.
On the Friday – the day before what would have been her wedding – Charlotte was going crazy. She couldn’t sleep, couldn’t focus on the stupid burbling TV, hadn’t so far dared to pick up the phone or go online. It was only hiding from that onslaught of pity, that tsunami of sorry, that was keeping her on her feet, and she knew it. Her thoughts were sliding back and forth like a low-slung pendulum – eat, TV, sleep – and that was where they needed to stay. But now she was twitching with loneliness, standing up, sitting down, waiting for the kettle to boil, then coming to and realising she’d been there for ages and the water had cooled. To make matters worse she knew there were hundreds of things to do. She had already started four different letters to Dan’s parents, asking them to help her find a lawyer, and abandoned them all. They weren’t answering the phone.
Charlotte pulled her
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