talk her out of it, so I laced my fingers together and she stepped into them and tried to pull herself up. That wasn’t entirely successful, so she ended up climbing onto my shoulders, and then hoisted herself up and over the top of the seven-foot-tall iron fence. The fact that she was doing all of that in a Chanel suit actually proved to be her saving grace, because when she toppled over the other side of the fence, her skirt caught on one of the metal pickets and kept her from hitting the ground.
It also meant she was hanging there like a piñata, and I quickly scrambled over the fence so I could help her down. “Well, shit! I’m caught like a fish on a hook,” Nana exclaimed. Just a moment after I got underneath her, the skirt tore completely in half, but I managed to catch her before she hit the ground. “Next time, we’re bringing a ladder,” she said as I put her down.
The skirt was still hanging on the top of the fence, and when I realized she was wearing a skimpy red thong under her pantyhose, I blushed and quickly looked away. She noticed my reaction and said, “Don’t worry, everything’s covered that’s supposed to be.” Um, yes and no. She hurried over to the garbage can, and when she raised the lid, Nana yelled, “Aha!” She reached in and pulled out a big handful of the deflated balloon arch. “Damn, look at all those limp dicks.” She held up a shriveled penis balloon by the tip and shook her head. “They were all so perky, too! And now it looks like a hundred old guys went skinny dipping in January.” Nana shuddered and dropped the balloons back into the can.
My phone beeped, and I checked the text message and told her, “Ollie says Huntington is pulling into his driveway. We have to go.”
“I have half a mind to march up to Humpington and kick him in his dingle berries,” Nana huffed. “Who does he think he is, stealing my personal property from the front of my house?”
“You have the evidence, so you could report it to the police,” I said. “For now though, since we’re actually trespassing, we need to go. Otherwise he’ll be the one pressing charges.”
Getting over the fence was even more graceless than it had been the first time. I gave Nana a boost onto the lid of the trash can, then hurried over the fence and tried to help her down. She used the same technique and tried to fling herself over the metal pickets, which produced the same result. Her jacket caught and tore, and Nana cursed like a sailor. “I really liked that suit,” she huffed. “I’m adding that to Humpington’s shit list.” Nana unbuttoned the jacket and basically fell out of it into my arms. She’d been wearing a red satin bustier under the jacket, and I put her down quickly as my cheeks ignited.
While she put her shoes on, I climbed back up and freed the skirt and jacket from the fence. But when I tried to hand them to her, she said, “Those are no good to me now. My tailor won’t be able to salvage them, not the way they tore through the fabric.” She took off down the alley, working that thong, bustier and pantyhose, and I hurried after her.
The outfit covered as much as most bathing suits, but she still turned the head of every neighbor she encountered as we emerged from the alley and circled around to the street. Huntington was still out front, engaged in some sort of heated debate with Ollie, who apparently had been stalling for time. Both men stopped and stared when Nana came into view, and Ollie called, “Hubba hubba! You’re a vision, hot stuff!”
The neighbor had a much different reaction, and turned red as he exclaimed, “Have you no shame, woman?”
“I must’ve left my shame in my other thong,” Nana told Huntington, holding her head high. “And don’t you be filing this away in your spank bank, you old pervert! You’re not man enough for a woman like me!” The neighbor turned red and sputtered indignantly, and Nana added, “By the way, I know what you did, and you
It also meant she was hanging there like a piñata, and I quickly scrambled over the fence so I could help her down. “Well, shit! I’m caught like a fish on a hook,” Nana exclaimed. Just a moment after I got underneath her, the skirt tore completely in half, but I managed to catch her before she hit the ground. “Next time, we’re bringing a ladder,” she said as I put her down.
The skirt was still hanging on the top of the fence, and when I realized she was wearing a skimpy red thong under her pantyhose, I blushed and quickly looked away. She noticed my reaction and said, “Don’t worry, everything’s covered that’s supposed to be.” Um, yes and no. She hurried over to the garbage can, and when she raised the lid, Nana yelled, “Aha!” She reached in and pulled out a big handful of the deflated balloon arch. “Damn, look at all those limp dicks.” She held up a shriveled penis balloon by the tip and shook her head. “They were all so perky, too! And now it looks like a hundred old guys went skinny dipping in January.” Nana shuddered and dropped the balloons back into the can.
My phone beeped, and I checked the text message and told her, “Ollie says Huntington is pulling into his driveway. We have to go.”
“I have half a mind to march up to Humpington and kick him in his dingle berries,” Nana huffed. “Who does he think he is, stealing my personal property from the front of my house?”
“You have the evidence, so you could report it to the police,” I said. “For now though, since we’re actually trespassing, we need to go. Otherwise he’ll be the one pressing charges.”
Getting over the fence was even more graceless than it had been the first time. I gave Nana a boost onto the lid of the trash can, then hurried over the fence and tried to help her down. She used the same technique and tried to fling herself over the metal pickets, which produced the same result. Her jacket caught and tore, and Nana cursed like a sailor. “I really liked that suit,” she huffed. “I’m adding that to Humpington’s shit list.” Nana unbuttoned the jacket and basically fell out of it into my arms. She’d been wearing a red satin bustier under the jacket, and I put her down quickly as my cheeks ignited.
While she put her shoes on, I climbed back up and freed the skirt and jacket from the fence. But when I tried to hand them to her, she said, “Those are no good to me now. My tailor won’t be able to salvage them, not the way they tore through the fabric.” She took off down the alley, working that thong, bustier and pantyhose, and I hurried after her.
The outfit covered as much as most bathing suits, but she still turned the head of every neighbor she encountered as we emerged from the alley and circled around to the street. Huntington was still out front, engaged in some sort of heated debate with Ollie, who apparently had been stalling for time. Both men stopped and stared when Nana came into view, and Ollie called, “Hubba hubba! You’re a vision, hot stuff!”
The neighbor had a much different reaction, and turned red as he exclaimed, “Have you no shame, woman?”
“I must’ve left my shame in my other thong,” Nana told Huntington, holding her head high. “And don’t you be filing this away in your spank bank, you old pervert! You’re not man enough for a woman like me!” The neighbor turned red and sputtered indignantly, and Nana added, “By the way, I know what you did, and you
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