The Crazy Things Girls Do for Love by Dyan Sheldon

didn’t come back.”
    “And who thought she would?” asks Clemens. “She slept through the whole thing.”
    “You were lucky,” mutters Waneeda as they lift another desk. “She’s a lot more fun asleep than awake.”
    “OK, but why did she come today if she’s not really interested?” Clemens is looking at Joy Marie. “That’s what I mean. What was she doing here?”
    Joy Marie looks at Waneeda.
    Waneeda is looking at the ceiling. If he figures it out for himself, fine. But if he doesn’t, she’s definitely not going to be the one to tell him why. He’s in advanced maths, for Pete’s sake. He can add one and one and get two.
    “Well, you know…” Apparently, it also isn’t going to be Joy Marie who explains to Clemens why this particular dawn has broken and this miracle has occurred. This is not to protect Waneeda, of course, but the club. Clemens has so many principles that he might kick out all the new members if he discovers the truth. “People change.”
    “Mountains change faster,” says Clemens. “And anyway, what about the other girl? The pink one?” Clemens, shuffling backwards, looks over his shoulder. “Isn’t that the girl who threatened me that time?”
    Waneeda swallows the last morsel of caramel. “She’s a witch. You’re lucky she didn’t turn you into a toad.”
    Joy Marie slams a chair down very close to Waneeda’s feet. “Well, I guess she’s changed, too,” she says brightly. “That was last year. She must’ve matured.”
    Clemens looks doubtful. “Besides threatening me, she told me to stuff my campaign up my finite resources.”
    “I’d like to stuff her up a finite resource,” mumbles Waneeda.
    “You know, you two don’t have to be so down on them,” says Joy Marie. “They’ve joined, that’s what’s important. And they and all the other new ones seem pretty excited. Why can’t you just leave it at that? We have a chance to start all over with these new members and really do some good.”
    Clemens smirks. “You mean if all these new members come back.”
    Joy Marie and Waneeda exchange a corner-of-the-eye look.
    “Oh, they’ll be back,” says Waneeda.
    You couldn’t keep any of them away with dogs.
    And that, of course, includes Waneeda.

Chapter Nineteen

Seen to be Green
    Some girls might be daunted by the idea of changing from a fur-loving carnivore into a recycling vegetarian more or less overnight, but Sicilee saw no problem.
    Kristin, Loretta and Ash all thought she’d lost her mind.
    “You mean you’re going Green?” Kristin hadn’t looked so horrified since her last bad haircut. “I know he’s gorgeous and everything, Siss, but you can’t be serious.”
    Loretta and Ash agreed. “Maybe if he was a big movie star or something,” said Loretta.
    “Or a prince,” said Ash.
    “Sweet Mary!” Sicilee moaned. “Do you guys read the words or do you just look at the pictures? Watch my lips! I am not really going Green. I’m just going to act like I am.” What could be easier? “You know, like wearing tinted lenses or a wig. It’s only for show.” She may look like an angel, but she thinks like a politician.
    “So you’re not really scarfing tofu and hugging trees?” checked Ash.
    “Of course not. The only thing I want to hug is Cody and I’m only meat-free when I’m at school. I’d rather give up water than give up meat.”
    Giving up water would probably be easier.
    Sicilee decided that, since Cody always brings his lunch from home, she should bring hers, too – forging yet another link in the chain of love that will eventually join them. How could he not go out with a girl who carries her lunch from home in a Green, insulated bag? Unfortunately, the Kewe’s refrigerator contains a lot more to drink that isn’t water than things to eat that didn’t once walk, swim or fly. Today, for example, the only vegetables Sicilee could find (unless you count the bean sprouts in the leftovers from last night’s takeout) were some