The Bachelorette Party by Karen McCullah Lutz Page B

right with the world now? I always leave kundalini class feeling so centered.”
    Zadie wasn’t sure that she’d ever been centered. But that momentary “Maybe things will be okay” feeling she’d had was something she’d welcome back.
    Elixir was an Asian-themed herbal tonic bar that sold shamanapproved beverages designed to soothe or stimulate the psyche.
Zadie opted for Virtual Buddha since it was supposed to produce a state of elation, something she hadn’t experienced in quite some time. Was this why Helen was so happy all the time? Was life really as simple as yoga and herbal potions?
    Helen gave Zadie a squeeze. “I’m so glad you’re here.” And for a second, Zadie was too. If she came out of this day with a newfound peace, it would be a day well spent.
    As they settled into wicker chairs on the wooden deck overlooking a gurgling fountain in the courtyard, Jane handed Helen the Chi Devil tonic which was supposed to make women horny. “We need to get you primed for the honeymoon.”
    Why Helen would want to be horny while they spent the rest of the day shopping was a puzzle. As she drank it with a blush and a giggle, Big Ass Betsy came roaring up. So much for elation.
    “Okay, who’s first?” She pulled out a horoscope book she’d bought down the street at the Bohdi Tree while the others were waiting in line at the “bar.”
    “Me,” Eloise said. “I’m a Cancer.” Yes, she was, Zadie thought.
    As Betsy ran down everyone’s horoscope, predicting fortune and travel and love and car trouble, Zadie took a moment to study Helen. Maybe she really was a kind, lovely person. And annoying as her perfection was, perhaps it was not done with evil intent. Her dislike of beanbag chairs wasn’t meant to hurt anyone. So she could be a tad judgmental. Who wasn’t? Zadie dismissed men on a regular basis simply because of their footwear. And Helen’s thoughtful gift-giving wasn’t the plague that Zadie had made it out to be. When she’d caught her reflection in the mirror framed with Italian tile before she left the apartment this morning she’d seen a large glob of eyeliner smeared on her left cheek. Much better to catch something like that on your own than to have the valet tell you as you get out of your car. Or not tell you. Helen had done her a favor by sending that mirror. Helen was a caring person.
    Zadie looked down at her now empty tonic. What was in this shit? It was like happy juice.
    “Zadie, here’s yours: ‘Don’t allow others to color your attitude. You know which way you want the wind to blow. Mercury in retrograde might not allow it, but keep your focus.’”Betsy scrunched her face up. “I hate it when Mercury’s in retrograde.”
    Zadie kept quiet while the others murmured their agreement. She could care less where Mercury was. Her horoscope on her nonwedding day had said, “Joy is the theme today, and those around you will see it in your eyes.” It was safe to say she wasn’t a believer.
    Big Ass Betsy pulled another book out of her bag. “I thought Helen might be able to use this one.” She held up How to Seduce Any Man in the Zodiac . The other ladies all snickered and mugged as if she’d pulled out a giant dildo. “What sign is Grey?”
    “He’s a Scorpio,” Helen answered.
    As Betsy flipped to the appropriate page, Zadie frowned. “I’m pretty sure he’s a Virgo.” She remembered Grey reading his horoscope aloud one day as they had breakfast at Hugo’s, complaining that Virgos never got to have any fun. Then he sent back his waffles because they weren’t crisp enough.
    “No, he’s a Scorpio. I’m positive. That’s why he’s so mysterious.”
    Mysterious? Grey? Were they talking about the same guy?
    Eloise piped up to settle things. “Actually, Zadie’s right. He’s a Virgo. He was born in August.”
    Helen looked stung. “How could I not know that? I could’ve sworn he told me he was a Scorpio.” The rest of the group got quiet, as if this were a bad