The Atonement Child by Francine Rivers Page A

abomination before God. It’s a sucking parasite! The sooner she gets rid of it, the better.”
    Joe wondered if his roommate had shared those feelings with Dynah. Ethan had always been perceptive and sensitive to others’ feelings, careful in how he dealt with people. Was he being careful with Dynah?
    It didn’t look like it.
    Dynah glanced back at Joe. He looked so grim, that muscle working in his jaw again. Was he angry with her, too? Ethan was. He said she was vacillating. She said she couldn’t help it. When she told him this morning that she was going to seek counseling before making any kind of decision, he’d slammed the telephone down in her ear. Oh, he’d called back a few minutes later to apologize. She knew because she stood listening to the message he left. “Dynah, look, I’m sorry. Pick up. Please. I know you’re there, Dy. You’re being unreasonable. I’ve been under a lot of pressure lately. Can’t you try to understand how I feel? I can understand how you’d like to think things through, but we’ve been over and over this. You’re just making the whole thing worse for both of us.”
    She’d turned it off before he finished.
    Sometimes she wondered if she knew him at all.
    “Never marry a man until you’ve seen how he handles getting a flat tire,” her aunt had joked once.
    Some flat tire, Lord.
    And now here was Joe, looking grim. She knew what side he’d be coming from. He was as adamant against abortion as Ethan was now for it. The only thing she didn’t know was where she fit into the equation.
    She pushed the cart farther down the aisle, shelving books carefully, afraid she’d make a mistake. “Go away, Joe. I don’t want to talk to you.”
    When he did, Dynah went on shelving books, gripped by guilt. She shouldn’t have been so rude to him. He had never said or done anything to warrant it. When she finished shelving all the books on the cart, she wheeled it back down the long aisle between the stacks of shelves. Joe was still sitting at the same table, books and papers spread out around him. He looked up when she paused at his table. “I’m sorry, Joe.”
    “You don’t have to apologize.”
    She shrugged, throat tight.
    The student across the table, appearing somewhat resigned and disgruntled, gathered up his books and papers, shoved them into his backpack, and departed to a cubby near the windows. Dynah blushed and wheeled her cart into the work area.
    Mrs. Talbot asked her to go out again and pick up texts that had been left on the study tables. Wheeling the cart out again, she carried out the chore, saving Joe’s table for last. Embarrassed, she spoke softly without meeting his gaze. “I’m going to talk to the pastor at Community,” she said in a hushed tone, putting two books on the cart.
    “Sounds like a good idea. When’re you going to see him?”
    “Sometime this week.” Whenever she could gather enough courage to do so. She wished she didn’t sound so ambivalent.
    “Want some company?”
    Surprised, she looked at him and almost said yes. Hesitating, she frowned slightly. She’d asked Ethan to go with her, but he refused. What problems would she create between Joe and Ethan if she said yes? “No, that’s all right. I think it’d be better if I went on my own.”
    “You’re sure?” Joe said, sensing her concerns. Sure, Ethan would be mad, maybe even jealous, but he didn’t care about that right now. Dynah was more important. Sooner or later, Ethan would come to his senses and see that.
    “I’m sure, but thanks.”
    She was far from sure several days later when she walked through the doors of Community Church and asked to see the pastor. The secretary was polite and asked no questions. She said Pastor Whitehall was with someone at the moment but would be finished shortly. Could she wait? Dynah said she could and took the seat offered, her stomach knotted.
    The door of the pastor’s office opened, and a distinguished-looking man in a dark-gray