The Alcoholics by Jim Thompson

recognize it for the baseless and unreasonable thing it is, is much greater than their fear of anything else. No, you can't frighten 'em, and since you're not one-since you're not immediately concerned with the disease-it would be less than pointless to try to frighten you… I brought you up here for just one reason: to get your idea on what I should do."
    "Well"-Jeff hesitated-"there's really no other way?"
    "None. And I haven't any more time. Oh, I'd be allowed to hang on a few days and wind things up, but practically speaking this is my last day-unless. I'll have to make my decision by late afternoon, get the money by then, or I'll be out of business."
    "And you're sure you can't do anything for this guy if-"
    "How could I? It's by no means certain that the men who operated on him, specialists, can do much for him. The question is, ethicalities aside, should he have that chance or should my patients-you've only met a few of the total- have a chance? Frankly, I don't seem to have accomplished much with them. I'm just about as far from the answer to alcoholism as I was in the beginning. But-"
    "What makes you so sure, Doc?"
    "What?" said Doc, irritably. "I've just got through explaining that-"
    He broke off, looking at Jeff. And Jeff grinned back at him, grinned in a way that was at once baffled and serious and glad.
    "You know something, Doc? I'm never going to take another drink as long as I live."
    Doc blinked, and his mouth twisted wryly. "Well, naturally, I'm glad you recognize the danger. But if I had a dollar for every alcoholic who told me-"
    "But I'm not going to," said Jeff. "Whether I'm an alcoholic or not-well, I guess I don't like that word very much, so let's just say I'm a guy who can't drink and isn't going to drink."
    Doc's heart began to pound. A great smile spread over his bony face.
    Just one man! Just to pull one of them back, to know that it hadn't all been wasted… But if you could do it with one …
    "What made you change your mind, Jeff?"
    "I don't know. I know in a way, but I can't quite put it into words. Not now, anyway. Maybe I-you're not going to make me leave this afternoon?"
    "You're damned right, I'm not!" vowed Doctor Murphy. "You and I have some more talking to do."
    "Well, I think I'd be all right if I left. But I want a chance to talk to the boys, Bernie and the General; fix things up with them for the way I acted at lunch."
    Doc started to nod. He caught himself. He had to be sure-as sure as it was possible to be.
    "Well, I don't know about that," he said. "After all, Bernie was pretty insulting to you. They all acted pretty lousy for that matter, letting you make a fool of yourself and then bawling you out or giving you the silent treatment. Why should you-?"
    Jeff laughed openly.
    "You know damned well I should. If I didn't, I'd be all hot and bothered and worried, the same way I've been a hundred other times when-"
    Doc's hand came down on his back with a resounding whack.
    "Jeff, if you don't make it, then it can't be made! If you don't do it, I think I'll-"
    "I'll make it," said Jeff.
    "I believe you will! By God, I believe you will… Now, let's get out of here and-"
    Jeff hesitated. "What about him, Doc?" he said.
    And Doc's face went blank for a moment. "Oh," be said, slow. "Yeah…"
    "Were you leveling with me? Did you really expect me to tell you what to do?"
    "I-I don't know," said Doctor Murphy. "But as long as I did ask you…"
    "I don't know, Doc. I-God, I wouldn't want to say! I mean, whatever you-"
    "Yes," said Doc. "I know what you mean."

13
    The several case reports had been typed and laid on his desk, but Miss Baker was still sitting at the small typewriting stand when Doctor Murphy entered his office. She sat very erect, her small white-shod feet squarely on the floor, her hands folded neatly in her lap. She looked a little like a shy child in a strange house, placed in one spot and afraid to move out of it.
    Doc sat down at his desk and looked through the reports;