Tequila Mockingbird by Tim Federle

INTRODUCTION
    An English major walks into a bar . . .
    Gentle Drinker:
    Congrats. You fought through War and Peace , burned through Fahrenheit 451 , and sailed through Moby-Dick . All right, all right, you nearly drowned in Moby-Dick , but you made it to shore—and you deserve a drink! Hang tight, undergrad. A beer’s not going to cut it. Not this time.
    To pay proper homage to the world’s greatest stories and storytellers, we’ve carefully crafted a library’s worth of literature-inspired cocktails. Scholarly sips for word nerds, if you will—and the people who love them. From barflies to book clubs, welcome to Tequila Mockingbird: Cocktails with a Literary Twist . Go ahead and pull up a stool. Or a recliner, for that matter.
    Don’t worry if you snoozed your way through Comp Lit. Think of this recipe guide as SparkNotes with a liquor license, trading out pop quizzes for popped corks. For you serious drink-slingers out there, we’re serving up your favorite recipes with a smart new twist. You’ve gotta have something to talk about behind the bar—why not raise the level of banter by brushing up on your Brontë?
    There are beverages here to suit all tastes. Ladies, get ready to celebrate history’s feistiest heroines in Drinks for Dames, a handful of recipes that take sugar and spice to a whole new level. From Are You There God? It’s Me, Margarita to A Rum of One’s Own to Bridget Jones’s Daiquiri , we’ve got every reading level covered.

    Gents, your brawny books go down easier with a halftime chug. In Gulps for Guys, literature’s most savory stories get stirred into over two dozen recipes. From The Last of the Mojitos to The Old Man and the Seagram’s and Orange Julius Caesar —with characters this vivid, you’ll never drink alone again.
    Book clubs, shake up your next gathering with party punches like The Joy Luck Club Soda and The Pitcher of Dorian Grey Goose . No problem if you haven’t even read this month’s selection—everyone’s bound to be fall-down drunk, anyway. Just leave your keys by the door.
    And fret not, recovering readers! We’ve got nonalcoholic drinks for you, too ( The Wonderful Blizzard of Oz , anyone?) that recall gentler, less wobbly times. No shame in sitting back while the freshmen make fools of themselves.
    If your buzz is on but your belly’s empty, we’ve cooked up The Deviled Egg Wears Prada , Prawn Quixote , and a handful of other Bar Bites for Book Hounds. And should you find yourself surrounded by a group of hesitant readers—or card-carrying library-goers—try our drinking games. You’ll be reading your friends under the table . . . you know, if they’re brave enough to take a shot every time Dickens introduces a new character.
    Relax. We won’t get too stuffy. After all, the only things needed to enjoy a good book are a lamp and a place to sit. An effective cocktail should be just as easy. For those who don’t know their Bloody Mary from their Mary Shelley, flip the page for a quick refresher on the tools, techniques, and terms used throughout this book. Trust us: if you’ve got a Solo cup and a corner store, you can make 90 percent of these recipes 100 percent of the time.
    So grab a glass, already. Let’s get a little stupid and look a little smart. Even if you don’t have a BA in English, tonight you’re gonna drink like you do.

TOOLS
GLASSWARE
    C OCKTAIL ( OR MARTINI ) GLASS (4 TO 6 OUNCES ): Drinks are shaken and strained into this long-stemmed, iconic v -shaped beauty.
    C OLLINS GLASS (10 TO 14 OUNCES ): Built like a highball glass, but taller and narrower. Best for icy, very large tropical drinks. Also best for getting drunk.
    F LUTE (4 TO 6 OUNCES ): Champagne cocktails are served in this specially designed stemware, which showcases the bubbles without letting too many of them fly free.
    H IGHBALL GLASS (10 TO 12 OUNCES ): Midway