Talking to Dragons by Patricia C. Wrede

relief. I didn’t think there was a polite way to kill a dragon, and I hadn’t been able to think of any other way of stopping it from eating Shiara and me if it wanted to. It was nice to know I wouldn’t have to try.
    â€œYou want a princess?” Shiara looked thoughtful. “Why?”
    â€œDragons are supposed to have princesses,” the dragon explained. “I can’t be considered a proper dragon until I have one. But I’ve been looking for two days, and I haven’t seen even a
smell
of a princess, and I’m tired of it. So you do it.”
    â€œYou aren’t going to eat her or anything, are you?” Shiara asked.
    â€œEat her?” The dragon sounded horrified. “And waste a perfectly good princess? Of course not! There aren’t enough of them to go around as it is. What kind of barbarian do you think I am?”
    â€œWell, I’ve never met a dragon before,” Shiara said. “How was I supposed to know? I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”
    â€œAll right,” said the dragon. “But you have to get me a princess. It doesn’t have to be a large one.”
    â€œDo you want any particular kind of princess?” Shiara asked. “I want to be sure you’ll be satisfied.”
    â€œOh, young and beautiful, of course,” the dragon said. “Are there other kinds?”
    â€œThere are enchanted princesses,” Shiara pointed out. “Especially around here.”
    â€œThat’s right. Say, maybe that’s why I haven’t found one!”
    â€œI wouldn’t be surprised,” Shiara said. “But will you take an enchanted princess?”
    The dragon thought for a minute. “No, I don’t think so. Spells make things too complicated.”
    â€œAnd does it matter how long it takes me to find her?” Shiara went on.
    The dragon considered. “I don’t want to wait too long, but I really don’t want to be unreasonable, either. How about a week? You bring the princess here by a week from today, otherwise you owe me another favor.” It licked its lips with a long red tongue.
    â€œThat sounds reasonable,” Shiara said. “But what if I’m early?”
    Suddenly I realized what Shiara was planning to do. I edged around the clearing, toward where the Princess was lying, but I wasn’t quite fast enough.
    â€œThe earlier the better,” the dragon said.
    â€œThen, there’s your princess!” Shiara said, and pointed.
    â€œMy, you do work fast,” the dragon said. It turned and looked at the Princess. “She’s certainly beautiful enough, but are you sure she isn’t enchanted?”
    â€œI’m quite sure,” Shiara said.
    â€œThen why is she asleep in the middle of the day? I didn’t think princesses were nocturnal creatures.”
    â€œShe just fainted when she saw you,” Shiara said reassuringly. “It’s nothing to worry about. It happens to princesses all the time. Will she do?”
    â€œQuite well.” The dragon nodded. “You’re very prompt. Thank you very much.”
    Shiara nodded. I waited until the dragon turned away, then I frowned at Shiara.
    â€œWhy did you do that?” I whispered. “That was a terrible thing to do!”
    â€œWould you rather I got eaten?” Shiara whispered back. “
She
won’t get eaten. The dragon said so. And I bet it won’t want her for long. Dragons are smarter than some people.”
    I didn’t know what to say to that, so I looked back at the dragon. As it bent its head to inspect the Princess more closely, the Princess opened her eyes. She gave a small scream, and the dragon frowned.
    â€œYou don’t have to be frightened,” it said. “Really. You’re my princess now, and I’m going to take proper care of you, and you can clean my scales and cook for me. I believe that’s the standard arrangement.”
    The