Tactics: A Game Plan for Discussing Your Christian Convictions by Gregory Koukl Page B
Authors: Gregory Koukl
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stumped you in the past. Brainstorm a handful of straightforward response questions that might put you in the driver's seat of those conversations. Imagine what it would look like to have a dialogue using your questions. This small bit of advance preparation takes a little work, but can be very effective. The next time you face those challenges, the responses will be right at your fingertips.
Always try to anticipate the rejoinders or counterarguments the other side might raise. Take these rejoinders seriously, stating them fairly and clearly — even convincingly. Then refute them in advance. This tactic removes the objections before they’re raised. It’s as if you’re saying,
"I know what you’re thinking and it’s not going to work. Here’s why.”
Second, after each encounter, take some time for self-assessment. I have made it a habit to immediately reflect on how I could have done better. It has become second nature. How did I do? Could I have asked better questions or maneuvered differently in the conversation? What were my missteps? How could I improve? With the pressure off, alternatives occur to me.
This is where the Ambassador Model from chapter 1 comes in handy. When I ask myself about the three skills of an ambassador — knowledge, an accurately informed mind; wisdom, an artful method; and character, an attractive manner—I have something specific to focus on. Did I know enough about the issue, or do I need to brush up on something for next time? Could I have maneuvered with more tactical wisdom in the conversation? Was my manner attractive? Did I act with grace, kindness, and patience?
You can do the same thing. Ask how you could have phrased questions more effectively or conducted yourself differently in the conversation. If a friend was with you during the encounter, enlist her help. As a bystander in the conversation, how did she think you were coming across?
This kind of assessment is not hard at all and can be a lot of fun. When you go back and think about an encounter, it prepares you for your next opportunity. The next time around, these new ideas will quickly come to mind.
Finally, when you think of a new idea or approach, practice it out loud. I do this constantly. I try to anticipate the twists and turns my new approach might take and how I would respond to possible comebacks. If I think of something, I practice it out loud. I say, "I could have said this . . . ," and then I play out the alternative. Often I'll write down my thoughts and review them later. If I'm with a friend, I ask him to role-play with me. He may think of moves on either side of the conversation that haven't occurred to me. Also, when we work on it together, we both learn from the experience.
Sometimes I practice this way when I'm alone in the car listening to talk radio. After listening to a few comments by the host or a caller, I turn the volume down and then pretend it is my job to respond to what was said. It's almost like being on live radio, except if I say something foolish, no one hears it.
Practice like this increases your practical experience. It places you in an actual dialogue in a way that is completely safe. Then, when these issues come up in real-life encounters, you'll be ready because you have already rehearsed your responses.
This is the way I prepare every time I'm interviewed on radio or TV, or every time I'm in a campus debate or a public "cross-fire" situation. It may sound to listeners like I am clever or quick on my feet, but this is not the case. Usually, my answers are not spontaneous at all, even when the conversation takes an unpredictable turn. If I have predicted the turn in advance and prepared for it, then I am not caught by surprise.
This is the same way political candidates prepare for televised debates or comedians prepare to be "spontaneously" funny on late-night talk shows. You will probably never be in a situation quite like one of these, but that doesn't mean you can't learn
Always try to anticipate the rejoinders or counterarguments the other side might raise. Take these rejoinders seriously, stating them fairly and clearly — even convincingly. Then refute them in advance. This tactic removes the objections before they’re raised. It’s as if you’re saying,
"I know what you’re thinking and it’s not going to work. Here’s why.”
Second, after each encounter, take some time for self-assessment. I have made it a habit to immediately reflect on how I could have done better. It has become second nature. How did I do? Could I have asked better questions or maneuvered differently in the conversation? What were my missteps? How could I improve? With the pressure off, alternatives occur to me.
This is where the Ambassador Model from chapter 1 comes in handy. When I ask myself about the three skills of an ambassador — knowledge, an accurately informed mind; wisdom, an artful method; and character, an attractive manner—I have something specific to focus on. Did I know enough about the issue, or do I need to brush up on something for next time? Could I have maneuvered with more tactical wisdom in the conversation? Was my manner attractive? Did I act with grace, kindness, and patience?
You can do the same thing. Ask how you could have phrased questions more effectively or conducted yourself differently in the conversation. If a friend was with you during the encounter, enlist her help. As a bystander in the conversation, how did she think you were coming across?
This kind of assessment is not hard at all and can be a lot of fun. When you go back and think about an encounter, it prepares you for your next opportunity. The next time around, these new ideas will quickly come to mind.
Finally, when you think of a new idea or approach, practice it out loud. I do this constantly. I try to anticipate the twists and turns my new approach might take and how I would respond to possible comebacks. If I think of something, I practice it out loud. I say, "I could have said this . . . ," and then I play out the alternative. Often I'll write down my thoughts and review them later. If I'm with a friend, I ask him to role-play with me. He may think of moves on either side of the conversation that haven't occurred to me. Also, when we work on it together, we both learn from the experience.
Sometimes I practice this way when I'm alone in the car listening to talk radio. After listening to a few comments by the host or a caller, I turn the volume down and then pretend it is my job to respond to what was said. It's almost like being on live radio, except if I say something foolish, no one hears it.
Practice like this increases your practical experience. It places you in an actual dialogue in a way that is completely safe. Then, when these issues come up in real-life encounters, you'll be ready because you have already rehearsed your responses.
This is the way I prepare every time I'm interviewed on radio or TV, or every time I'm in a campus debate or a public "cross-fire" situation. It may sound to listeners like I am clever or quick on my feet, but this is not the case. Usually, my answers are not spontaneous at all, even when the conversation takes an unpredictable turn. If I have predicted the turn in advance and prepared for it, then I am not caught by surprise.
This is the same way political candidates prepare for televised debates or comedians prepare to be "spontaneously" funny on late-night talk shows. You will probably never be in a situation quite like one of these, but that doesn't mean you can't learn
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