Swagger (Radioactive Tales of Love) by Nikki Prince

I have ever thought of just running away from him, from this? I have no clue what I’ll do about my mother, but I do know, I want to keep going and plunging into whatever this is with Cruz.
    I run my hands over his arms and his back. There are scars everywhere on his back just like his chest. I kiss his shoulder. All I can think as he thrusts into me. He’s mine all mine . I wasn’t going to give him up, if I could help it.
    I’m aching, he feels so good to me. I’m close to flying. This is my man and no matter how messed up we both are it’s a beautiful, sexy mess and it’s all ours. The pleasure builds and builds and I let go, I cry out. I know I’m not making any sense. Then, I feel him tense up.
    He says my name in that perfect way of his. “Roxie, Roxie, Oh fucking hell, Roxie!”
    “Cruz!” I shatter as bright stars shine behind my eyes. This is what they call the little death? I would die repeatedly in his arms if that’s the case.
    He falls against me and we’re both huffing and puffing as if we’d run a marathon—a marathon done horizontally and naked. His body is heavy and I welcome the heaviness. I close my eyes to the sound of his breathing. I could stay right here—forever.
    ***
     
    If this isn’t perfection I didn’t know what was. I lay with her in my arms now under the covers. We’ve cleaned up, then gotten comfy in the bed. No words needed. I’d fallen asleep for a while which in itself is amazing. Sleep? What’s that other than something that eludes me daily?
    Roxie stirs as she lay against me.
    I gaze down at her to find her big brown eyes wide open.
    “Mmm…sleep well?”
    “Oh, yes. I didn’t realize I was so tired until I just woke up.” She giggled.
    “Right and you snored.”
    “I did not!” She gasps and slaps my arm playfully.
    “You did…really big snores too.”
    She laughs. “You take that back, Cruz.”
    “Okay, just little baby snores. You happy now?” I tease her. It feels nice not to be so serious.
    “No.” She laughs again.
    “I think you’re all sorts of happy.” I kiss her lips and put my head on her breasts. Just to lie there and listen to her heartbeat. It’s a nice steady rhythm and I want to hold on to her—keep her with me no matter what ugliness arises.

Chapter 18
    Roxie
    4 months later
     
    It’s now the end of the semester. I’ve taken my finals and Cruz and I have been seeing each other on the daily. I haven’t told my mother and to keep questions at bay, Cruz moved into the hotel where we first we had sex… Sex… A hot, sweaty and sinfully good kind of sex. I want to call it making love. It seems like a scary thing to me though, maybe if I put it in such a category, he was liable to leave. When you love someone with all your heart, they usually end up hurting you. I want to believe differently about Cruz. I guess I would see.
    Per our usual, I sat in Starbucks, having a Chai Tea Latte, waiting for Cruz to meet me. It’s sad how it’s the Starbucks in the next town. I’ve been telling my mom and Kathy that I was doing some extra studying for finals. Yeah, I’m a coward. I should just tell them I’m seeing Cruz and it how it has nothing at all to do with them and it never would. I just didn’t want the drama it would bring.
    Cruz on the other hand, wants to just deal with it. I don’t blame him. We were sneaking around as if we were married and cheating on spouses. I told him eventually, we would. I need time to get to know him without the interference of my mother. I sigh. “Why does everything have to be so complicated?”
    “It doesn’t have to be.”
    Cruz.
    I paste a smile on my face.
    Cruz leans over and kisses me softly, settling down with his Earl Grey tea and a chocolate croissant for us both.
    “Thanks,” I say and I reach for the decadent delight.
    “You’re welcome baby.” He says and settles across from me. “Now what’s the serious far off look about?”
    I can’t lie to him. “The usual. I’m worried