accomplish something and can cross it off the list.
At the top of the page I wrote “On My Ship” and then listed all the things I wished for and wanted. I’m talking everything: a new boyfriend, a new career, more time for Evan, a new stove, smaller pants, copper plumbing, landscaping in my yard, et cetera. No matter how trivial it was, if I wanted it, I put it on my list.
Then I created a sub-list—the ship that had the things I couldn’t buy (when I had the money), the less tangible, less easily accomplished goals that I
really
wanted to try for. These were the things that would better my life, my spirit, and my well-being (the stove, copper plumbing, and the services of a gardener were obviously not on it). This was the ship I made it a priority to swim for first. Then, one by one, I found a way to go after these big wants.
Truth: Instead of waiting for someone to ask me to write my first book, I wrote one. Then I went to publishers and searched for the one whose team shared my vision of becoming a successful author.
Truth: When no one would cast me in a TV show, I wrote myself into my own story concepts and scripts, and then went to every studio and network with a smile on my face and pitched the crap out of my shows.
Truth: During a particularly dry dating spell—I just couldn’t find a man worth bonking—I asked people around me who had very high personal standards to set me up with men they thought would be good for me.
Now, not all of my books have sold gazillions, not all of my TV show ideas saw the light of day or lasted long when they did, not every blind date turned into aboyfriend or even a roll in the hay …
but that wasn’t the point of making the effort!
Are you following this pep talk at all? The point was, I swam out to my ship! I went after the things I wanted in my life instead of going the easier (and dicey) route of sitting back and waiting. Instead of nursing the wounds of self-pity, I put myself out there, put my ass on the line, and let myself be vulnerable to failure. Because when you’re vulnerable to failure you’re also vulnerable to success. I’m not saying it’s easy, but it’s worth it. Honest to God, swear on my awesome life: self-doubt, inaction, and indecision kill more dreams than failure ever could. I now know that I’m too smart for doubt, inaction, and indecision even on my blondest day.
OTHER HALFTIME LOCKER ROOM ENCOURAGEMENT
The past is behind you, so there’s no reason to keep beating yourself up over what you didn’t do right.
The present is now. You’re either living all over it or it’s living all over you—that’s your choice.
The future is a big block of clay waiting for you to mold it into something spectacular.
You don’t need anyone’s permission to seek happiness. Life is not one big traffic light at which you have to wait your turn. See the green light and floor it.
Changing your ways may be difficult at first and it’s hard to gain momentum, but once you get your stroke down, you’ll be swimming full steam out to your own ship.
It feels better living in the skin of someone who braves the ocean tides to swim to her destiny than living in the skin of someone braving the sofa in her fat pants feeling sorry for herself.
My Resolution to Go Slow
One of my best characteristics is that I’m spontaneous—I can shift gears, scrap plans, and get on board with your new idea quickly. I’m more of a “Yes, let’s give that a whirl” person than a skeptical, conservative “Let’s wait and see” type. Spontaneity works for me. Being cautious and suspicious doesn’t feel like a very pleasant way to go through life, and slamming on the brakes just leaves me carsick.
Another thing I like about myself is that I don’t judge. I am more than willing to talk to and hang with seeming weirdos, the ones most people don’t even give a second look. The payoff is that I click with the most surprising and unlikely people. It’s an awesome
At the top of the page I wrote “On My Ship” and then listed all the things I wished for and wanted. I’m talking everything: a new boyfriend, a new career, more time for Evan, a new stove, smaller pants, copper plumbing, landscaping in my yard, et cetera. No matter how trivial it was, if I wanted it, I put it on my list.
Then I created a sub-list—the ship that had the things I couldn’t buy (when I had the money), the less tangible, less easily accomplished goals that I
really
wanted to try for. These were the things that would better my life, my spirit, and my well-being (the stove, copper plumbing, and the services of a gardener were obviously not on it). This was the ship I made it a priority to swim for first. Then, one by one, I found a way to go after these big wants.
Truth: Instead of waiting for someone to ask me to write my first book, I wrote one. Then I went to publishers and searched for the one whose team shared my vision of becoming a successful author.
Truth: When no one would cast me in a TV show, I wrote myself into my own story concepts and scripts, and then went to every studio and network with a smile on my face and pitched the crap out of my shows.
Truth: During a particularly dry dating spell—I just couldn’t find a man worth bonking—I asked people around me who had very high personal standards to set me up with men they thought would be good for me.
Now, not all of my books have sold gazillions, not all of my TV show ideas saw the light of day or lasted long when they did, not every blind date turned into aboyfriend or even a roll in the hay …
but that wasn’t the point of making the effort!
Are you following this pep talk at all? The point was, I swam out to my ship! I went after the things I wanted in my life instead of going the easier (and dicey) route of sitting back and waiting. Instead of nursing the wounds of self-pity, I put myself out there, put my ass on the line, and let myself be vulnerable to failure. Because when you’re vulnerable to failure you’re also vulnerable to success. I’m not saying it’s easy, but it’s worth it. Honest to God, swear on my awesome life: self-doubt, inaction, and indecision kill more dreams than failure ever could. I now know that I’m too smart for doubt, inaction, and indecision even on my blondest day.
OTHER HALFTIME LOCKER ROOM ENCOURAGEMENT
The past is behind you, so there’s no reason to keep beating yourself up over what you didn’t do right.
The present is now. You’re either living all over it or it’s living all over you—that’s your choice.
The future is a big block of clay waiting for you to mold it into something spectacular.
You don’t need anyone’s permission to seek happiness. Life is not one big traffic light at which you have to wait your turn. See the green light and floor it.
Changing your ways may be difficult at first and it’s hard to gain momentum, but once you get your stroke down, you’ll be swimming full steam out to your own ship.
It feels better living in the skin of someone who braves the ocean tides to swim to her destiny than living in the skin of someone braving the sofa in her fat pants feeling sorry for herself.
My Resolution to Go Slow
One of my best characteristics is that I’m spontaneous—I can shift gears, scrap plans, and get on board with your new idea quickly. I’m more of a “Yes, let’s give that a whirl” person than a skeptical, conservative “Let’s wait and see” type. Spontaneity works for me. Being cautious and suspicious doesn’t feel like a very pleasant way to go through life, and slamming on the brakes just leaves me carsick.
Another thing I like about myself is that I don’t judge. I am more than willing to talk to and hang with seeming weirdos, the ones most people don’t even give a second look. The payoff is that I click with the most surprising and unlikely people. It’s an awesome
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