Stalking the Dragon by Mike Resnick Page A

remember?”
    â€œMy passionate nature got the better of me. It was rude of me to want to tear off your head and spit down your neck, and I truly regret mentioning it.”
    â€œYou're forgiven,” said Mallory. “And now we're late for an appointment, so…”
    â€œTake me with you!” cried the goblin.
    â€œLike that?” asked Jeeves, who had been a fascinated observer of the little scene.
    â€œHelp me straighten up and I'll be fine.”
    Jeeves walked once around the bent-over goblin. “How would you suggest?”he asked. “I suppose I could put a knee in your back and pull your arms behind you and…”
    â€œThe cure sounds worse than the problem,” complained the goblin.
    â€œWell then,” said Jeeves, “I could tie your arms over your head, and hang you from a tree until you stretch out—but I don't have any rope with me.”
    â€œFelina,” said Mallory, “go straighten him out.”
    Still smiling, the cat-girl approached Chou En-lai Smith, extended a forefinger, slid it just beneath the point of his chin, and pressed upward—and as she pressed, he straightened up until a few seconds later he was standing erect.
    â€œThank you,” he said. “She's quite a weapon, that cat-thing.”
    â€œYou just have to know how to aim her,” said Mallory.
    â€œSo can I come along with you?” asked the goblin.
    â€œWhat the hell,” said Mallory with a shrug. “They've already taken a shot at me. Who knows? I may need two bodyguards before this case is over.”
    â€œCase?” repeated the goblin.
    â€œI'm a detective.”
    â€œHave you got an oversexed secretary called Velma? I'm told they go with the job.”
    â€œNo,” said Mallory. “I have a partner who's addicted to romance novels and shooting things, an office cat who's a walking appetite, and a magic mirror with an attitude.”
    â€œPity,” sympathized the goblin. “What kind of case are we on?”
    â€œWe're after a stolen dragon.”
    â€œGood!” enthused the goblin. “Finding dragons is one of the very best things I do.”
    â€œRight up there with fighting, is it?” said Mallory.
    â€œI won't tease you about not having a Velma, and you don't tease me about my slipped disk, okay?”
    â€œDeal,” said Mallory. He checked his watch. “And now we've really got to get going.” He began walking toward the dragon pond. “What should we call you?”
    â€œAll my friends call me Chou,” replied the goblin.
    â€œJoe it is,” said the detective.
    â€œJust one moment,” said Joe the goblin. He stepped ahead of Mallory and shouted: “This man and his friends are under my protection. Be warned that anyone who threatens or even hinders us faces my fierce and righteous wrath.” He turned to Mallory. “Okay, we can go.”
    â€œNow?” asked Mallory. “Or should we wait for all the laughter to die down?”

C HAPTER 10
    10:33 PM –11:01 PM
    â€œI think I see it,” said Jeeves, peering into the darkness.
    â€œEither that, or someone is playing with matches,” said Mallory as small flames briefly darted out.
    â€œNot to worry,” said Joe, moving to the front of the procession. “I'll protect you.”
    â€œFrom the pond's attendants, or from my partner?” asked Mallory dryly.
    â€œIt's not easy being a superhero,” said Joe in hurt tones. “The least you can do is not make fun of me.”
    â€œDo you really come from Vietnam?” asked Jeeves.
    â€œAlmost,” said the goblin.
    â€œAlmost?”
    â€œI come from the Vietnamese section of the Bronx,” replied Joe.
    â€œThat's only a block or two long,” noted Mallory.
    â€œEven so, we have our heroes,” said Joe.
    â€œFor example?”
    â€œDanny Diem,” said Joe. “He moved to Hollywood ten years ago. Whenever you