blush. “So Tuesday?”
He backs up a step from the door and bows lightly. “At your service.”
I think I want to like him. He’s the first person in a very long time that I’ve invited in. I do want to like him, so what’s holding me back?
After Drew leaves, I call Mary Chris and invite her over for my famous grilled triple-cheese sandwiches. I’m halfway through my second sandwich before I get the courage to ask her what I’ve wanted to since I called her.
“So?” I ask. “What’s with you and Ryan?”
Mare blushes. “He’s cute, right?”
“If you say so.”
“You don’t see it?”
I shrug.
“Because you’re too busy checking out his brother.”
“What?”
Mare’s face turns serious. “Don’t. You can block out the rest ofthe world, but I’m your best friend. Don’t even think about keeping secrets from me.”
I’m pretty sure my face burns. Did Jason tell her about my search for the letter? “I was going to tell you.” Just not until I knew what there was to tell.
“I can’t believe I had to hear it from my dad!”
Her dad? But Mr. Moss thought I was making out. Oh. She thinks I’m keeping secrets about Tanner. “It was just a kiss. It didn’t mean anything.”
“It was not just a kiss. It was your first kiss. Did you think you could just pretend it didn’t happen?”
“Can’t I?”
“No!” But Mare is smiling now. “So? How was it?”
“Okay.”
“Okay?” Mare points her sandwich at my chest. “You’ve never lied to me before. Don’t start now.”
Too late. Way, way too late.
I try to think of words that will make what I did make sense.
I was just trying to find out why your dad has a letter with my mom’s name on it that he didn’t want someone to find
. No.
I just invited Drew over to cover for me while I snuck into your dad’s office to go through his stuff because I still can’t accept that my mother didn’t leave me on purpose
. No way.
I kissed Tanner so your dad wouldn’t find out I was spying on him
. No, no, no.
“Fine,” I say. “Kissing Tanner was kind of amazing.” I give her this small truth, and hope it will tide her over until I know if there’s even anything else to tell.
“I knew it!” Mare hugs me hard enough that it hurts.
“And you were going to tell me about Ryan when?”
It’s Mare’s turn to blush. She talks animatedly about how much she really connects with Ryan, but I only half-listen. I’m still thinking about the secrets I keep buried.
By the time Tuesday night comes around, I’m a basket case. When I get to Sconehenge, Drew is already there, at a table near the back of the restaurant underneath one of the giant fake rock structures. I start toward him, but stop when I see Tanner two tables over, leaning over a basket of sweet potato fries between him and Ryan. I change my path across the restaurant to avoid walking by him.
I slide into the seat next to Drew, trying not to look at Tanner. The waitress sets a Diet Coke in front of me without asking me what I want. I stir the drink with my straw absently.
Drew pats me lightly on the knee. “This will be good. You need to know, right?”
I nod my head. He’s right. I need to know.
A woman with bright red hair walks up to our table and holds out her hand. “I’m Heather.”
I don’t know what I expected, but this woman is not it. Her hair frizzes out in every direction at once. She’s too thin and too pale, which only accentuates the dark circles beneath her hollow eyes. Her clothes are small enough to be children’s clothes, yet they hang on her tiny frame.
She sits down across from Drew and offers a closed-mouth smile. When she looks at me her eyes turn pitying. “You must be the daughter.”
The daughter of the dead woman. “That’s me.”
The waitress comes back and Heather orders a burger and fries. When the waitress leaves Heather focuses her tired eyes on me. “Aren’t you having anything?”
I shake my head. I have nothing to say to
He backs up a step from the door and bows lightly. “At your service.”
I think I want to like him. He’s the first person in a very long time that I’ve invited in. I do want to like him, so what’s holding me back?
After Drew leaves, I call Mary Chris and invite her over for my famous grilled triple-cheese sandwiches. I’m halfway through my second sandwich before I get the courage to ask her what I’ve wanted to since I called her.
“So?” I ask. “What’s with you and Ryan?”
Mare blushes. “He’s cute, right?”
“If you say so.”
“You don’t see it?”
I shrug.
“Because you’re too busy checking out his brother.”
“What?”
Mare’s face turns serious. “Don’t. You can block out the rest ofthe world, but I’m your best friend. Don’t even think about keeping secrets from me.”
I’m pretty sure my face burns. Did Jason tell her about my search for the letter? “I was going to tell you.” Just not until I knew what there was to tell.
“I can’t believe I had to hear it from my dad!”
Her dad? But Mr. Moss thought I was making out. Oh. She thinks I’m keeping secrets about Tanner. “It was just a kiss. It didn’t mean anything.”
“It was not just a kiss. It was your first kiss. Did you think you could just pretend it didn’t happen?”
“Can’t I?”
“No!” But Mare is smiling now. “So? How was it?”
“Okay.”
“Okay?” Mare points her sandwich at my chest. “You’ve never lied to me before. Don’t start now.”
Too late. Way, way too late.
I try to think of words that will make what I did make sense.
I was just trying to find out why your dad has a letter with my mom’s name on it that he didn’t want someone to find
. No.
I just invited Drew over to cover for me while I snuck into your dad’s office to go through his stuff because I still can’t accept that my mother didn’t leave me on purpose
. No way.
I kissed Tanner so your dad wouldn’t find out I was spying on him
. No, no, no.
“Fine,” I say. “Kissing Tanner was kind of amazing.” I give her this small truth, and hope it will tide her over until I know if there’s even anything else to tell.
“I knew it!” Mare hugs me hard enough that it hurts.
“And you were going to tell me about Ryan when?”
It’s Mare’s turn to blush. She talks animatedly about how much she really connects with Ryan, but I only half-listen. I’m still thinking about the secrets I keep buried.
By the time Tuesday night comes around, I’m a basket case. When I get to Sconehenge, Drew is already there, at a table near the back of the restaurant underneath one of the giant fake rock structures. I start toward him, but stop when I see Tanner two tables over, leaning over a basket of sweet potato fries between him and Ryan. I change my path across the restaurant to avoid walking by him.
I slide into the seat next to Drew, trying not to look at Tanner. The waitress sets a Diet Coke in front of me without asking me what I want. I stir the drink with my straw absently.
Drew pats me lightly on the knee. “This will be good. You need to know, right?”
I nod my head. He’s right. I need to know.
A woman with bright red hair walks up to our table and holds out her hand. “I’m Heather.”
I don’t know what I expected, but this woman is not it. Her hair frizzes out in every direction at once. She’s too thin and too pale, which only accentuates the dark circles beneath her hollow eyes. Her clothes are small enough to be children’s clothes, yet they hang on her tiny frame.
She sits down across from Drew and offers a closed-mouth smile. When she looks at me her eyes turn pitying. “You must be the daughter.”
The daughter of the dead woman. “That’s me.”
The waitress comes back and Heather orders a burger and fries. When the waitress leaves Heather focuses her tired eyes on me. “Aren’t you having anything?”
I shake my head. I have nothing to say to
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