Jason. Van’s mind raced with the implications of a rebound relationship. Then she caught herself. When did that start to matter? When had her mind gone to relationship status? Somewhere over the shrimp cocktail?
When Natalie was done, Van tilted her chin up. “Let me get this straight. You were married to an asshole who called you frigid for twelve years. Then you move here where you started to have sexy dreams about making love with women and decided you’re a lesbian.”
Natalie blushed. “Well, yes.”
“And you want me to be your first lover?” Van hesitated when she felt a tug over her heart. Natalie was sweet and looked gorgeous in the moonlight. She didn’t know if she would be able to walk away from her after she made love to her. Being someone’s first was a huge responsibility, and she already cared enough about Natalie to not want to hurt her. Van needed to walk away now. She wanted to tell her that they could be friends, she really did. But what came out of her mouth was completely different. “So, Natalie, do you want to come home with me?”
*
Natalie leaned against the closed door and tried not to feel stupid. She just had the best date in her life with the gorgeous Van, whom she was fiercely attracted to. Oh, and a kiss that rocked her world, let’s not forget that.
“So, Natalie, do you want to come home with me?”
She wanted to do just that. But what did she do instead? She looked straight into Van’s eyes and froze. Jason’s ugly words came out of nowhere to slap her. Frigid.
Natalie knew her body was telling her the complete opposite, but to erase something that had been a huge part of her identity for her entire adult life was at the very least, difficult. She felt a piece of her would die if she went home with Van and saw disappointment, or worse, regret, in her face the next morning.
Van took her refusal seemingly in stride and was pleasant to her on the way home. The kiss she gave Natalie on the cheek was a friendly one, giving no hint of the passion they had felt earlier.
Natalie went to her room, stepping quietly through the hall so as not to wake her sleeping mother and got ready for bed.
She lay still but her emotions wouldn’t settle and her mind raced with alternate scenarios that could have played out, but didn’t. She felt the threat of tears burning behind her eyes.
What if Van didn’t want to go out with her again? Natalie didn’t know if her heart could take another rejection.
As she slipped into a dream state, Natalie became conscious she was running. While she sped down the hallway, it seemed to extend itself, the stairway slipping farther and farther away. The only sound she could hear was the echo of solid footsteps behind her. Even those sounded far away as her heavy breathing and heartbeat pounded in her eardrums. She could see Beth running beside her in slow motion, terror etched in her face as she looked back.
“Go ahead and run, you stupid little bitch. I’ll catch you. You’re going to wish you hadn’t.”
Chapter Eleven
Van felt completely useless this morning. She couldn’t concentrate. Maybe she should go out with a work crew to get her mind on the job and off of Natalie and the abrupt ending of their date last night. She headed outside intending to do just that, but jumped into her truck instead. Van turned into the now familiar driveway then dialed her phone.
“Hello?”
“Natalie?”
“Yes. Who’s calling please?”
God, she had a sexy voice. “It’s Van. Did I wake you?”
“No.”
“I called to see if you would have coffee with me this morning.”
“I would love to. What time?”
“Great. Open your front door.” She snapped her phone closed.
“You have me at a slight disadvantage here.” Natalie gestured to her rumpled nightshirt and messy hair.
Van thought she looked adorable. She wanted to pick her up and crawl back in bed with her. “You look beautiful in the morning.” She stopped and sniffed the air.
When Natalie was done, Van tilted her chin up. “Let me get this straight. You were married to an asshole who called you frigid for twelve years. Then you move here where you started to have sexy dreams about making love with women and decided you’re a lesbian.”
Natalie blushed. “Well, yes.”
“And you want me to be your first lover?” Van hesitated when she felt a tug over her heart. Natalie was sweet and looked gorgeous in the moonlight. She didn’t know if she would be able to walk away from her after she made love to her. Being someone’s first was a huge responsibility, and she already cared enough about Natalie to not want to hurt her. Van needed to walk away now. She wanted to tell her that they could be friends, she really did. But what came out of her mouth was completely different. “So, Natalie, do you want to come home with me?”
*
Natalie leaned against the closed door and tried not to feel stupid. She just had the best date in her life with the gorgeous Van, whom she was fiercely attracted to. Oh, and a kiss that rocked her world, let’s not forget that.
“So, Natalie, do you want to come home with me?”
She wanted to do just that. But what did she do instead? She looked straight into Van’s eyes and froze. Jason’s ugly words came out of nowhere to slap her. Frigid.
Natalie knew her body was telling her the complete opposite, but to erase something that had been a huge part of her identity for her entire adult life was at the very least, difficult. She felt a piece of her would die if she went home with Van and saw disappointment, or worse, regret, in her face the next morning.
Van took her refusal seemingly in stride and was pleasant to her on the way home. The kiss she gave Natalie on the cheek was a friendly one, giving no hint of the passion they had felt earlier.
Natalie went to her room, stepping quietly through the hall so as not to wake her sleeping mother and got ready for bed.
She lay still but her emotions wouldn’t settle and her mind raced with alternate scenarios that could have played out, but didn’t. She felt the threat of tears burning behind her eyes.
What if Van didn’t want to go out with her again? Natalie didn’t know if her heart could take another rejection.
As she slipped into a dream state, Natalie became conscious she was running. While she sped down the hallway, it seemed to extend itself, the stairway slipping farther and farther away. The only sound she could hear was the echo of solid footsteps behind her. Even those sounded far away as her heavy breathing and heartbeat pounded in her eardrums. She could see Beth running beside her in slow motion, terror etched in her face as she looked back.
“Go ahead and run, you stupid little bitch. I’ll catch you. You’re going to wish you hadn’t.”
Chapter Eleven
Van felt completely useless this morning. She couldn’t concentrate. Maybe she should go out with a work crew to get her mind on the job and off of Natalie and the abrupt ending of their date last night. She headed outside intending to do just that, but jumped into her truck instead. Van turned into the now familiar driveway then dialed her phone.
“Hello?”
“Natalie?”
“Yes. Who’s calling please?”
God, she had a sexy voice. “It’s Van. Did I wake you?”
“No.”
“I called to see if you would have coffee with me this morning.”
“I would love to. What time?”
“Great. Open your front door.” She snapped her phone closed.
“You have me at a slight disadvantage here.” Natalie gestured to her rumpled nightshirt and messy hair.
Van thought she looked adorable. She wanted to pick her up and crawl back in bed with her. “You look beautiful in the morning.” She stopped and sniffed the air.
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