Something I Can Never Have by Travis Thrasher

Author Note
    This is just a nice little warning for those of you who will read this short novella.
    As the title and the cover copy state, this story is what I’m calling a B-side to The Solitary Tales. I’m old enough to remember B-sides. Once upon a time, before downloads and iTunes, musicians would release albums. I’m not talking about records—no, I’m not
that
old. But albums, usually consisting of about ten songs. Many times they’d release a few singles from the album. And on those singles (records, tapes, CDs), there would be B-sides.
    Some of my favorite songs have been B-sides.
    To me, a B-side doesn’t mean it’s garbage that the artist is just throwing out there. No, usually it’s a song that’s a bit different from their others. Perhaps it’s not as upbeat. Perhaps it doesn’t fit with the album. Perhaps it’s just an experiment. But it’s still a decent song worthy of putting out there.
    So consider
Something I Can Never Have
as a B-side to my teen series The Solitary Tales.
    My warning is to those of you who have never read
Solitary
or
Gravestone.
    Earlier this year, the publisher gave away
Solitary
as a free download for a couple weeks (after I begged them for a while to do this). Over 52,000 copies were downloaded. This was awesome, of course, because it meant the book was getting into the hands of readers who would otherwise never buy a copy or even know about it.
    Some of these readers, however, were less than thrilled. Because
Solitary
doesn’t exactly have a lot of closure at its end. In fact, the ending leaves you openedmouthed, wondering what the heck just happened.
    There were a few people that didn’t understand the meaning of the word
tales
and thought that
Solitary
was a stand-alone work. Thus, they were a bit miffed. They shared those thoughts in some reviews.
    So my warning is for those of you curious about this B-side and thinking you’re going to have a nice, interesting story … well, you might be a bit miffed too.
    This isn’t exactly an appetizer to the rest of the meal. It’s more like a shot of whiskey taken halfway through your dinner. It’s short, gives you a jolt—but you need to know what you’re getting.
    For those of you thinking I’m just cashing in on the cash cow that is The Solitary Tales, well, you’re right. I actually had a ghostwriter whip this up in one night while I was dining on my yacht on Lake Michigan. (And if you believe all of that, then please, DO NOT read the rest of The Solitary Tales. Or else you’ll be calling the authorities and telling them to head to Solitary, North Carolina.)
    For fans of this series, I wanted to do this as a way to give you something between the releases of books #2 and #3.
Temptation
will be here in April, followed by
Hurt.
At this moment, I’m nearing the finish line of
Hurt.
Many questions will be answered, I promise. I’ve grown rather attached to this creepy town and our wonderful narrator. It’s a pity that in the end …
    Oh, well, I won’t spoil it now.
    Travis Thrasher
    11/12/11

“The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he did not exist.
And like that … he is gone.”
—from
The Usual Suspects

April 14, 1997
    Dear Dr. Barlow:
    Please accept my apology for not having written sooner. I know you’re not a fan of computers and e-mails, but I’ve gotten so used to both that it’s been difficult to put a literal pen to paper. It was good to hear from you last night. Thank you for calling and checking up on Heidi and me. You asked about some things—some things you said you could detect in my voice—and I said I’d write to you about them. But first things first.
    The church is amazing. The pastor is a wonderful man with a really nice family, and he’s doing a lot of good things. His heart is really in the right spot. It seems that God has put him there for a reason, just like he put me here. The students I’m working with are great. There are so many—at least a hundred