anymore. And if it was going to make the rest of my workout easier… Fine. The hell with it.
Claire and Noah left me alone to sort out my ‘accessories,’ neither one saying a word, and then I jumped on the treadmill next to my sister. It was a weird sensation to be in a familiar space for the first time without my “extra ears,” like being underwater or covering my ears with my hands. Still, I’d never known anything besides a life of coping with or without my hearing aids, so I adjusted quickly.
We did intervals of walking and running for six miles, side by side, and I don’t know how in the hell I did that. Granted, Claire could definitely still run faster, but with my eyes locked on Noah for his every instruction, I found something to keep me going. I wanted to do well, almost like I had something to prove. To Claire? To Noah? Or to myself? Either way, I was running, unencumbered by my hearing aids and my own insecurities, and it felt amazing.
“You looked…really happy today, Jen,” said Noah, once the treadmill playtime had ended. Claire had gone to the bathroom, leaving us alone in the front lobby . The smile he gave me renewed the wave of heat passing through me that had just begun to cool down after my workout.
I smiled back, fidgeting with the stubborn zipper of my hoodie.
“You know you don’t need them around me, right?” He looked at me intently. “If it’s more comfortable without them, I will make sure you hear every word I say .”
Looking up at him, we shared a silent moment, our eyes connected. I really believed him. Noah could be trusted—not to treat me special because I had a disability or go easy on me because he felt bad for me. He understood the way I felt about my hearing aids and he wanted to help me work around them.
“Thanks,” I said, absentmindedly adjusting the left one. “I appreciate that. More than you know.”
“I told you so,” Claire said, rejoining us. She turned to me and signed ‘You’re welcome’—a circular motion over her heart. I smirked at her, shaking my head, and signed ‘Thank you.’
Noah laughed lightly, looking between us. “You speak sign language?”
“Yeah, ASL, ” answered Claire. “Our parents learned and taught us when we got Jen’s diagnosis. We used to have Family Signing Night once a week—no talking aloud—just for practice. They wanted Jen to be able to communicate with us no matter what.”
“Mostly it just became a way for us to talk about people right in front of them,” I laughed.
“Wow,” he said, impressed. “I always wanted to learn. I can spell my name…”
And he could, more or less, which he demonstrated clumsily. I bit back my laughter at his adorable attempt. Instead, I spelled mine back for him and then signed that I would teach him to sign.
He blinked a few times. “Sorry…didn’t catch anything after the letter J.”
“I guess you’ll just have to be my trainer more often, so you can pick up some signs,” I teased.
Claire signed to me: “I bet he’s picking one up right now, you flir t.” Her eyes scolded me as her hands flew through the words.
“Totally lost,” Noah said, shaking his head. “But I’m looking forward to m y lessons.”
He winked at me and I really want ed to stay and start those lessons right away . If Claire hadn’t dragged me away, I probably wouldn’t have left.
****
On the ride home, I finally worked up the nerve to ask Claire about the party.
“And why do you want me to go with you?” she asked, almost offended that I would ask her. “You’re a big girl; can’t you manage a social evening on your own?”
“Well, it’s not that so much as I just want some moral support…” I said, tiptoeing around the important information. I was afraid if she knew the party was Sean’s, she wouldn’t agree to go. I didn’t think I could convince her that
Claire and Noah left me alone to sort out my ‘accessories,’ neither one saying a word, and then I jumped on the treadmill next to my sister. It was a weird sensation to be in a familiar space for the first time without my “extra ears,” like being underwater or covering my ears with my hands. Still, I’d never known anything besides a life of coping with or without my hearing aids, so I adjusted quickly.
We did intervals of walking and running for six miles, side by side, and I don’t know how in the hell I did that. Granted, Claire could definitely still run faster, but with my eyes locked on Noah for his every instruction, I found something to keep me going. I wanted to do well, almost like I had something to prove. To Claire? To Noah? Or to myself? Either way, I was running, unencumbered by my hearing aids and my own insecurities, and it felt amazing.
“You looked…really happy today, Jen,” said Noah, once the treadmill playtime had ended. Claire had gone to the bathroom, leaving us alone in the front lobby . The smile he gave me renewed the wave of heat passing through me that had just begun to cool down after my workout.
I smiled back, fidgeting with the stubborn zipper of my hoodie.
“You know you don’t need them around me, right?” He looked at me intently. “If it’s more comfortable without them, I will make sure you hear every word I say .”
Looking up at him, we shared a silent moment, our eyes connected. I really believed him. Noah could be trusted—not to treat me special because I had a disability or go easy on me because he felt bad for me. He understood the way I felt about my hearing aids and he wanted to help me work around them.
“Thanks,” I said, absentmindedly adjusting the left one. “I appreciate that. More than you know.”
“I told you so,” Claire said, rejoining us. She turned to me and signed ‘You’re welcome’—a circular motion over her heart. I smirked at her, shaking my head, and signed ‘Thank you.’
Noah laughed lightly, looking between us. “You speak sign language?”
“Yeah, ASL, ” answered Claire. “Our parents learned and taught us when we got Jen’s diagnosis. We used to have Family Signing Night once a week—no talking aloud—just for practice. They wanted Jen to be able to communicate with us no matter what.”
“Mostly it just became a way for us to talk about people right in front of them,” I laughed.
“Wow,” he said, impressed. “I always wanted to learn. I can spell my name…”
And he could, more or less, which he demonstrated clumsily. I bit back my laughter at his adorable attempt. Instead, I spelled mine back for him and then signed that I would teach him to sign.
He blinked a few times. “Sorry…didn’t catch anything after the letter J.”
“I guess you’ll just have to be my trainer more often, so you can pick up some signs,” I teased.
Claire signed to me: “I bet he’s picking one up right now, you flir t.” Her eyes scolded me as her hands flew through the words.
“Totally lost,” Noah said, shaking his head. “But I’m looking forward to m y lessons.”
He winked at me and I really want ed to stay and start those lessons right away . If Claire hadn’t dragged me away, I probably wouldn’t have left.
****
On the ride home, I finally worked up the nerve to ask Claire about the party.
“And why do you want me to go with you?” she asked, almost offended that I would ask her. “You’re a big girl; can’t you manage a social evening on your own?”
“Well, it’s not that so much as I just want some moral support…” I said, tiptoeing around the important information. I was afraid if she knew the party was Sean’s, she wouldn’t agree to go. I didn’t think I could convince her that
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