suggested, coming to her feet with her feeble old bones. Why didn’t she just retire?
“You should retire,” I said, giving my own suggestion.
“And do what, McKenzie?”
I didn’t answer. I wasn’t expecting her to turn the table, although I should have. “One day is enough,” I assured her with a smile, but not to her.
“Look at me, McKenzie.”
“I can’t,” I admitted, playing with a thread around the bottom of my shirt.
“Because you’ve never been this far before. Have you, McKenzie?”
I shook my head with a sigh and tight lips, but I still didn’t answer.
“I think we need to discuss Kyle more.”
“I don’t,” I said, looking straight at her. I was paying her, not vice versa, and she wasn’t cheap either. This was bullshit. She shouldn’t get to call the shots.
“I think this has more to do with Kyle than Gia. You’ve spent almost two years coming here to tell me how great your life was growing up with Gia. Does Gia know that you were in love with her father?”
“No. And I never said anything about love. I really have to go. We don’t need to discuss, Kyle. Kyle was an accident that has nothing to do with anything.”
“I don’t beli eve that for half a second. I think Kyle plays more of role in shaping McKenzie into who she is than she wants to admit. I think McKenzie uses Gia as a crutch to keep from thinking about Kyle, or the rape. What else is McKenzie working so diligently on to forget?”
“McKenzie is standing right here. I’ve got to go.” I walked out without another glance. She didn’t know shit about shit. Who the hell did she think she was anyway? I didn’t pay her think. I paid her to listen.
“You house hunting?” Colton asked, kissing the top of my head from behind.
“No, it was just something that popped up on the side,” I lied about the beach house too close to Myrtle Beach for my liking. There had to be something secluded around the beach.
“Get dressed. Let’s go out to eat,” Colton coaxed.
Looking up to him over my shoulder, I let him kiss me. “Why? You mean like in public?”
“You’re in public all the time.”
“Yeah, but not like that. There’s this nice black man named Troy over on 5 th Avenue, he has the best Gyro truck in New York. Let’s walk there and eat in the park.”
“Let’s not. Go get ready, wear your hair up, slip into some sexy heels, and let’s go out on the town.”
I didn’t want to do that. I didn’t know how to do that. Crowded places gave me anxiety. It sounds stupid, I know. Why would a person with my people-phobia choose New York? Who knows. Who knows why I chose to do a lot of the things I did. I dreamed about it though. Someday I would have a house in the middle of nowhere, some place secluded with a pond maybe, or maybe even an isolated beach house.
Relentlessly, I agreed. Colton took me to MoMia’s, and we dined, looking over the city lights and sipping expensive wine. The food was divine, and the ambient blue lights manipulated the room into a romantic atmosphere for two. Quiet piano played from a French composer in the middle of the room.
I happily took Colton’s hand when he asked for a dance. Following him to the balcony dance floor, I caught a glimpse of the two of us through the glass, only it wasn’t Colton. It was Kyle. Go ddamnit. This was why I didn’t talk about it. This was why I should have moved on to the next therapist months ago and why I should have never taken the next step with Colton.
Closing my eyes , I tried not to ruin the moment. This wasn’t Kyle. This wasn’t that night in Fiji. This wasn’t the city lights glowing from the top of our hotel. I squeezed my eyes tightly, and Colton held me tighter. I wasn’t seeking his touch. I was seeking, Kyle’s.
Opening my eyes to see the twinkling lights below, I knew what it was. The piano. It was that song. I looked to the man behind the piano. It was him. The same guy. He didn’t even look older. He looked the
“You should retire,” I said, giving my own suggestion.
“And do what, McKenzie?”
I didn’t answer. I wasn’t expecting her to turn the table, although I should have. “One day is enough,” I assured her with a smile, but not to her.
“Look at me, McKenzie.”
“I can’t,” I admitted, playing with a thread around the bottom of my shirt.
“Because you’ve never been this far before. Have you, McKenzie?”
I shook my head with a sigh and tight lips, but I still didn’t answer.
“I think we need to discuss Kyle more.”
“I don’t,” I said, looking straight at her. I was paying her, not vice versa, and she wasn’t cheap either. This was bullshit. She shouldn’t get to call the shots.
“I think this has more to do with Kyle than Gia. You’ve spent almost two years coming here to tell me how great your life was growing up with Gia. Does Gia know that you were in love with her father?”
“No. And I never said anything about love. I really have to go. We don’t need to discuss, Kyle. Kyle was an accident that has nothing to do with anything.”
“I don’t beli eve that for half a second. I think Kyle plays more of role in shaping McKenzie into who she is than she wants to admit. I think McKenzie uses Gia as a crutch to keep from thinking about Kyle, or the rape. What else is McKenzie working so diligently on to forget?”
“McKenzie is standing right here. I’ve got to go.” I walked out without another glance. She didn’t know shit about shit. Who the hell did she think she was anyway? I didn’t pay her think. I paid her to listen.
“You house hunting?” Colton asked, kissing the top of my head from behind.
“No, it was just something that popped up on the side,” I lied about the beach house too close to Myrtle Beach for my liking. There had to be something secluded around the beach.
“Get dressed. Let’s go out to eat,” Colton coaxed.
Looking up to him over my shoulder, I let him kiss me. “Why? You mean like in public?”
“You’re in public all the time.”
“Yeah, but not like that. There’s this nice black man named Troy over on 5 th Avenue, he has the best Gyro truck in New York. Let’s walk there and eat in the park.”
“Let’s not. Go get ready, wear your hair up, slip into some sexy heels, and let’s go out on the town.”
I didn’t want to do that. I didn’t know how to do that. Crowded places gave me anxiety. It sounds stupid, I know. Why would a person with my people-phobia choose New York? Who knows. Who knows why I chose to do a lot of the things I did. I dreamed about it though. Someday I would have a house in the middle of nowhere, some place secluded with a pond maybe, or maybe even an isolated beach house.
Relentlessly, I agreed. Colton took me to MoMia’s, and we dined, looking over the city lights and sipping expensive wine. The food was divine, and the ambient blue lights manipulated the room into a romantic atmosphere for two. Quiet piano played from a French composer in the middle of the room.
I happily took Colton’s hand when he asked for a dance. Following him to the balcony dance floor, I caught a glimpse of the two of us through the glass, only it wasn’t Colton. It was Kyle. Go ddamnit. This was why I didn’t talk about it. This was why I should have moved on to the next therapist months ago and why I should have never taken the next step with Colton.
Closing my eyes , I tried not to ruin the moment. This wasn’t Kyle. This wasn’t that night in Fiji. This wasn’t the city lights glowing from the top of our hotel. I squeezed my eyes tightly, and Colton held me tighter. I wasn’t seeking his touch. I was seeking, Kyle’s.
Opening my eyes to see the twinkling lights below, I knew what it was. The piano. It was that song. I looked to the man behind the piano. It was him. The same guy. He didn’t even look older. He looked the
Similar Books
