agitated with me.
“I am,” I whispered. “I just don’t know what to do. I got behind early, and never was able to catch up.”
“We have a one-time grade replacement program here at the university. Mostly due to students like you who show great promise, but have one rough semester. I highly recommend you retake Thermodynamics and use it. Even if you get A’s in your classes next semester, a failing grade will keep you from averaging what you need. Not to mention, Thermodynamics is a building block class for your degree and without understanding it, your classes are just going to continue to get harder.”
I nodded. “I can do that.”
“You will have to pay for it, though. Your scholarship doesn’t cover repeat courses.”
“I understand,” I said, having no idea where I was going to get the $2500 I needed for the class.
“I’m also not giving you a pass on your work study hours. I warned you a month ago that you had to get serious. My grad student said you’ve been flaky at best and often incompetent. I was sure he had the wrong student, but he assures me it was you.”
His words punched me in the gut. Never in my life had I been such a disappointment to someone. I was the stellar student, daughter and friend. I prided myself in always being the best in the class and constantly exceeding expectations. Yet, as I sat there, I realized how far I was from that person.
I hadn’t spoken to Cara in weeks, and even before, I didn’t think to ask her anything about her life, just clambered on about mine. Issy no longer even asked me to go out with her, knowing I would sit and sulk the whole time. I vaguely caught the rest of what Dr. Davis was saying until he cleared his throat.
“Are you staying on campus for Thanksgiving?” he asked.
“I hadn’t decided yet.”
“Well, I recommend you do. You have fifty hours left in your work study requirement, and I expect you to honor those. Thanksgiving break will be a great chance to get in some hours and my grad student needs the extra help with it being the holidays. He was less than thrilled when I said you would be the one helping him, but I assured him you would be the perfect assistant.”
“I will. I promise. I don’t know what to say except...I’m sorry.” My voice cracked a little as I choked out the words.
“I know you’re better than this, Avery. We’ll talk again after finals and figure out the way forward from there.”
I nodded and stood to leave, giving his receptionist a little wave on the way out. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t want to go home and face the loneliness that waited for me there.
I tried calling Jake, but he didn’t answer. We had spoken periodically the last couple weeks, but usually only when I initiated it. I missed him though. I wanted someone to tell me it was going to be ok. I wanted to feel his arms around me one more time, just so I could feel worthy again.
Before I even registered my actions, I was on my way to his apartment. I had never just shown up there unannounced before, but I knew he cared about me and would understand when I told him what I was facing.
I walked to his door and lightly knocked, my stomach turning inside out with nervousness. He answered the door and my breath caught. I had almost forgotten how beautiful he was. He had on a pair of jeans and was shirtless. His hair looked like he had just woken up for the day and he was squinting at the light.
“Avery, what are you doing here?” he asked, fully surprised to see me standing there.
“I just needed to see you. Do you have a minute to talk?” I was careful as I glanced at him, silently urging him to let me in, but not wanting to give away my feelings as easily as he said I did.
I heard a noise in the background and immediately placed that thick southern accent. He wasn’t alone. I stepped back as if I had been slapped in the face and turned to head back to my car. I would have taken off in a full sprint if I could only get
“I am,” I whispered. “I just don’t know what to do. I got behind early, and never was able to catch up.”
“We have a one-time grade replacement program here at the university. Mostly due to students like you who show great promise, but have one rough semester. I highly recommend you retake Thermodynamics and use it. Even if you get A’s in your classes next semester, a failing grade will keep you from averaging what you need. Not to mention, Thermodynamics is a building block class for your degree and without understanding it, your classes are just going to continue to get harder.”
I nodded. “I can do that.”
“You will have to pay for it, though. Your scholarship doesn’t cover repeat courses.”
“I understand,” I said, having no idea where I was going to get the $2500 I needed for the class.
“I’m also not giving you a pass on your work study hours. I warned you a month ago that you had to get serious. My grad student said you’ve been flaky at best and often incompetent. I was sure he had the wrong student, but he assures me it was you.”
His words punched me in the gut. Never in my life had I been such a disappointment to someone. I was the stellar student, daughter and friend. I prided myself in always being the best in the class and constantly exceeding expectations. Yet, as I sat there, I realized how far I was from that person.
I hadn’t spoken to Cara in weeks, and even before, I didn’t think to ask her anything about her life, just clambered on about mine. Issy no longer even asked me to go out with her, knowing I would sit and sulk the whole time. I vaguely caught the rest of what Dr. Davis was saying until he cleared his throat.
“Are you staying on campus for Thanksgiving?” he asked.
“I hadn’t decided yet.”
“Well, I recommend you do. You have fifty hours left in your work study requirement, and I expect you to honor those. Thanksgiving break will be a great chance to get in some hours and my grad student needs the extra help with it being the holidays. He was less than thrilled when I said you would be the one helping him, but I assured him you would be the perfect assistant.”
“I will. I promise. I don’t know what to say except...I’m sorry.” My voice cracked a little as I choked out the words.
“I know you’re better than this, Avery. We’ll talk again after finals and figure out the way forward from there.”
I nodded and stood to leave, giving his receptionist a little wave on the way out. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t want to go home and face the loneliness that waited for me there.
I tried calling Jake, but he didn’t answer. We had spoken periodically the last couple weeks, but usually only when I initiated it. I missed him though. I wanted someone to tell me it was going to be ok. I wanted to feel his arms around me one more time, just so I could feel worthy again.
Before I even registered my actions, I was on my way to his apartment. I had never just shown up there unannounced before, but I knew he cared about me and would understand when I told him what I was facing.
I walked to his door and lightly knocked, my stomach turning inside out with nervousness. He answered the door and my breath caught. I had almost forgotten how beautiful he was. He had on a pair of jeans and was shirtless. His hair looked like he had just woken up for the day and he was squinting at the light.
“Avery, what are you doing here?” he asked, fully surprised to see me standing there.
“I just needed to see you. Do you have a minute to talk?” I was careful as I glanced at him, silently urging him to let me in, but not wanting to give away my feelings as easily as he said I did.
I heard a noise in the background and immediately placed that thick southern accent. He wasn’t alone. I stepped back as if I had been slapped in the face and turned to head back to my car. I would have taken off in a full sprint if I could only get
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