cousin, the sister of my heart. They had taken everything —
everything
— I loved from me.
Why had I run?
What did I have left to lose?
I knew then that I would die that night. I did not care. I would die, but I would make them suffer first. I dropped to my knees, scrabbling in the dirt of the herb garden for the sharp fragments of stone that edged the borders. I would have used anything. Any weapon was good enough. I felt as if I could tear out my enemy’s throat with my teeth, if only I could get close enough.
I would wait, here in the dark, hidden from everyone. The only one who could see me was Terayama-san. He would find me, and when he did, I would not run. I would not give him the satisfaction. I would let my weaving fall, and I would scream out the truth for everyone to hear. When he reached for me, I would put out his eyes.
For my father. For Aimi. For myself. For all of us.
Even when they killed me, and even if they all thought me mad, they would still hear the truth. Maybe they would wonder, and rumors would start. Or maybe they would all be too afraid to talk. It didn’t matter. I would see him bleed. I would hear him scream. My face would be the last thing he would ever see. Just this once, Terayama’s prey would turn on him.
Something moved in the kitchen doorway. I whirled, clutching a sharp lump of rock in each hand.
“Little Mistress?”
I heard doors opening not far away, and saw light spilling out into the garden. They were coming. I twitched, but did not move.
“It is you under there, Little Mistress? Your weavings have grown powerful since you visited me last.”
Oh, no. I let the shadow illusion drop as I stepped toward him. “Youta,” I said urgently, low voiced. “Get back inside. It isn’t safe here now.”
His head went back a little. “Why is it not safe? Why are you holding those rocks as if you thought they were knives?”
“Youta, go away. I do not want you in this fight.”
The voices and the lights were moving. Not in this direction yet — they were heading toward the trees — but it was only a matter of time.
“Fight? Who are you intending to fight?”
I growled with impatience. “Terayama-san! I can’t escape him, so I must face him.”
“You want to fight him? He will kill you!” His voice shook. It was the most upset I had ever heard him, and part of me was sorry, but it was too late now.
“Listen to me: I know what I must do, and I am not afraid.” I turned from him to look at the lights bobbing between the trees. “Go inside before he catches you out here with me.”
A hand clamped over my mouth and an arm as thick and strong as a tree branch wrapped around my middle. The rocks dropped from my fingers as I struggled, trying to pry Youta off without hurting him. His breath barked in my ear, and I could hear the strain in his voice as he whispered, “Be still. If you do not wish them to find us together, be quiet. I will not let you go.”
He dragged me into the kitchen, where the muted glow of the fires showed blanket-wrapped forms huddled in sleep. There was an open door to the right, and Youta pushed me inside. There were no fires within — only the moonlight falling through a row of small, high windows showed that we were in a storage space filled with barrels and firewood. Youta finally took his hand from my mouth as he turned to carefully pull the door closed behind us.
“How dare you!” I said, shoving myself away from him. “What right have you to interfere?”
“As much right as anyone in the world and more, you foolish girl,” he said, leaning against the door. “I did not save your life so that you could waste it like this.”
“Terayama-san betrayed my father and committed treason against the Moon Prince. He knows I have discovered it. He cannot let me live. Why should I not die with honor, fighting?”
Youta blanched, then shook his head. “He has not caught you yet! I can smuggle you away. He cannot search the whole city
everything
— I loved from me.
Why had I run?
What did I have left to lose?
I knew then that I would die that night. I did not care. I would die, but I would make them suffer first. I dropped to my knees, scrabbling in the dirt of the herb garden for the sharp fragments of stone that edged the borders. I would have used anything. Any weapon was good enough. I felt as if I could tear out my enemy’s throat with my teeth, if only I could get close enough.
I would wait, here in the dark, hidden from everyone. The only one who could see me was Terayama-san. He would find me, and when he did, I would not run. I would not give him the satisfaction. I would let my weaving fall, and I would scream out the truth for everyone to hear. When he reached for me, I would put out his eyes.
For my father. For Aimi. For myself. For all of us.
Even when they killed me, and even if they all thought me mad, they would still hear the truth. Maybe they would wonder, and rumors would start. Or maybe they would all be too afraid to talk. It didn’t matter. I would see him bleed. I would hear him scream. My face would be the last thing he would ever see. Just this once, Terayama’s prey would turn on him.
Something moved in the kitchen doorway. I whirled, clutching a sharp lump of rock in each hand.
“Little Mistress?”
I heard doors opening not far away, and saw light spilling out into the garden. They were coming. I twitched, but did not move.
“It is you under there, Little Mistress? Your weavings have grown powerful since you visited me last.”
Oh, no. I let the shadow illusion drop as I stepped toward him. “Youta,” I said urgently, low voiced. “Get back inside. It isn’t safe here now.”
His head went back a little. “Why is it not safe? Why are you holding those rocks as if you thought they were knives?”
“Youta, go away. I do not want you in this fight.”
The voices and the lights were moving. Not in this direction yet — they were heading toward the trees — but it was only a matter of time.
“Fight? Who are you intending to fight?”
I growled with impatience. “Terayama-san! I can’t escape him, so I must face him.”
“You want to fight him? He will kill you!” His voice shook. It was the most upset I had ever heard him, and part of me was sorry, but it was too late now.
“Listen to me: I know what I must do, and I am not afraid.” I turned from him to look at the lights bobbing between the trees. “Go inside before he catches you out here with me.”
A hand clamped over my mouth and an arm as thick and strong as a tree branch wrapped around my middle. The rocks dropped from my fingers as I struggled, trying to pry Youta off without hurting him. His breath barked in my ear, and I could hear the strain in his voice as he whispered, “Be still. If you do not wish them to find us together, be quiet. I will not let you go.”
He dragged me into the kitchen, where the muted glow of the fires showed blanket-wrapped forms huddled in sleep. There was an open door to the right, and Youta pushed me inside. There were no fires within — only the moonlight falling through a row of small, high windows showed that we were in a storage space filled with barrels and firewood. Youta finally took his hand from my mouth as he turned to carefully pull the door closed behind us.
“How dare you!” I said, shoving myself away from him. “What right have you to interfere?”
“As much right as anyone in the world and more, you foolish girl,” he said, leaning against the door. “I did not save your life so that you could waste it like this.”
“Terayama-san betrayed my father and committed treason against the Moon Prince. He knows I have discovered it. He cannot let me live. Why should I not die with honor, fighting?”
Youta blanched, then shook his head. “He has not caught you yet! I can smuggle you away. He cannot search the whole city
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