clear what my place was.”
She laughed and the sound of it stabbed through me.
“I guess I needed rules even for that. You should have explained I was expected to let perverts put their hands on me and take whatever insults rich, bitchy socialites send my way—”
The sound of shattering glass caught us both off guard. I stared at the table I’d just upended, hardly able to believe what I’d just done. It had been a long time since I’d lost control like that.
Sucking in a breath, I squeezed my eyes closed. “Stop. I…just. I fucked up. I didn’t know he’d touched you. I didn’t know he’d…I just didn’t know. I’m sorry.”
Aleena didn’t say anything.
“Please don’t leave me, Aleena.”
Again…nothing.
Terror unlike anything I’d known in a long, long time started to grow inside me and I turned, staring at her. I couldn’t lose her. “I…fuck, Aleena. Just tell me what it is you want. What you need. I don’t know how to do this. You want me to take you out on dates? Fine. We can do that.” Desperate, I looked around. She’d dropped some clothes so I grabbed them and held them out. “Get dressed. We can go out right now. You want to go dancing? The movies? Just…just you’ve got to tell me how to do this because I don’t know how.”
“What do you mean you don’t know how?” She eyed the clothes I held, almost nervously, and I realized she was still clutching clothes she’d gathered in her hands.
Feeling stupid now, I lowered my hands. I dropped down onto the bed, staring at the pale green sweater and a faded pair of jeans. “I don’t…I don’t do relationships, Aleena. These…they just aren’t my thing. I’ve told you that.”
“Oh, I get that you’re not much for relationships.” She toyed with the sleeve of the shirt she held, her eyes bouncing around. “Trust me, I’ve noticed. Because that’s about all I can do. Notice. Because I can’t get to know anything about you any other way.”
“You…” I looked at her, then away.
Tell me about the nightmares .
I laughed sourly and surged up off the bed. I got it now. I had no doubt what had driven her to ask. Penelope had definitely pulled out all the stops tonight. I’d seen the gleam in her eyes when we’d been talking just before Eddie had pulled me aside. I knew that gleam, knew she’d been causing trouble. She knew what had happened to me. If it had happened any time recently, I doubt any amount of money could have hidden it, thanks to the wonders—or atrocities—of social media. But over a decade ago, news didn’t travel the way it did now and scandals were easier to hide.
But nothing stayed hidden from everybody. Or forever.
If you had the money and knew who to ask, you could find out almost anything.
Penelope was one who had the money and she knew who to ask. I wouldn’t have even put it past her to have asked my mother, though I hoped to hell that wasn’t where she’d gotten her information. I’d never forgive that.
Tell me about the nightmares.
It was the last thing I wanted to do. Ever.
But it was the only thing I could do if I wanted to keep her. I just hoped what I told her didn’t drive her away.
Swallowing hard and wishing I had something to clear away the metallic taste of my blood, I lifted my gaze and stared at Aleena.
“When I was fifteen years old, I was kidnapped.”
Like it happened in slow motion, the clothes Aleena held dropped from her hands. I saw each piece. A lacy bra. A pink blouse. Jeans. A silky scrap that could only be panties. “What?” she whispered.
“I don’t remember exactly how it happened—how he grabbed me. I just…” I lifted my eyes to the ceiling, trying to focus on the elegant white fan pattern instead of the memories. If I gave it like a report, I could do this. It wasn’t like I hadn’t talked about it a hundred times. A thousand even. “I woke up. He had me restrained. I...”
A soft gasp escaped her.
I deliberately focused on
She laughed and the sound of it stabbed through me.
“I guess I needed rules even for that. You should have explained I was expected to let perverts put their hands on me and take whatever insults rich, bitchy socialites send my way—”
The sound of shattering glass caught us both off guard. I stared at the table I’d just upended, hardly able to believe what I’d just done. It had been a long time since I’d lost control like that.
Sucking in a breath, I squeezed my eyes closed. “Stop. I…just. I fucked up. I didn’t know he’d touched you. I didn’t know he’d…I just didn’t know. I’m sorry.”
Aleena didn’t say anything.
“Please don’t leave me, Aleena.”
Again…nothing.
Terror unlike anything I’d known in a long, long time started to grow inside me and I turned, staring at her. I couldn’t lose her. “I…fuck, Aleena. Just tell me what it is you want. What you need. I don’t know how to do this. You want me to take you out on dates? Fine. We can do that.” Desperate, I looked around. She’d dropped some clothes so I grabbed them and held them out. “Get dressed. We can go out right now. You want to go dancing? The movies? Just…just you’ve got to tell me how to do this because I don’t know how.”
“What do you mean you don’t know how?” She eyed the clothes I held, almost nervously, and I realized she was still clutching clothes she’d gathered in her hands.
Feeling stupid now, I lowered my hands. I dropped down onto the bed, staring at the pale green sweater and a faded pair of jeans. “I don’t…I don’t do relationships, Aleena. These…they just aren’t my thing. I’ve told you that.”
“Oh, I get that you’re not much for relationships.” She toyed with the sleeve of the shirt she held, her eyes bouncing around. “Trust me, I’ve noticed. Because that’s about all I can do. Notice. Because I can’t get to know anything about you any other way.”
“You…” I looked at her, then away.
Tell me about the nightmares .
I laughed sourly and surged up off the bed. I got it now. I had no doubt what had driven her to ask. Penelope had definitely pulled out all the stops tonight. I’d seen the gleam in her eyes when we’d been talking just before Eddie had pulled me aside. I knew that gleam, knew she’d been causing trouble. She knew what had happened to me. If it had happened any time recently, I doubt any amount of money could have hidden it, thanks to the wonders—or atrocities—of social media. But over a decade ago, news didn’t travel the way it did now and scandals were easier to hide.
But nothing stayed hidden from everybody. Or forever.
If you had the money and knew who to ask, you could find out almost anything.
Penelope was one who had the money and she knew who to ask. I wouldn’t have even put it past her to have asked my mother, though I hoped to hell that wasn’t where she’d gotten her information. I’d never forgive that.
Tell me about the nightmares.
It was the last thing I wanted to do. Ever.
But it was the only thing I could do if I wanted to keep her. I just hoped what I told her didn’t drive her away.
Swallowing hard and wishing I had something to clear away the metallic taste of my blood, I lifted my gaze and stared at Aleena.
“When I was fifteen years old, I was kidnapped.”
Like it happened in slow motion, the clothes Aleena held dropped from her hands. I saw each piece. A lacy bra. A pink blouse. Jeans. A silky scrap that could only be panties. “What?” she whispered.
“I don’t remember exactly how it happened—how he grabbed me. I just…” I lifted my eyes to the ceiling, trying to focus on the elegant white fan pattern instead of the memories. If I gave it like a report, I could do this. It wasn’t like I hadn’t talked about it a hundred times. A thousand even. “I woke up. He had me restrained. I...”
A soft gasp escaped her.
I deliberately focused on
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