Angry tears gathered at the corners of my eyes
threatening to fall. Kennan closed the distance between us with two
smooth steps and tilted my chin up toward his face.
“I am sorry. I don’t want you to feel like a
prisoner. I just made a promise to your dad and I am doing my very
best to keep that promise. I can’t do that if I don’t know where
you are. Of course you have freedom. But I have to know where you
are. You can’t just leave, sometimes you have to prepare before
going out into the world. There are mental protections I can put in
place when I have enough time. I can shield you from Xavier’s
prying."
“Listen, I get that you are just trying to
protect me. You are trying to keep a promise or whatever. But you
have to understand that a week ago my life was normal. I was just a
bike messenger, living in Chicago, going about my day to day life.
Now I am some sort of prophet, Seer-person on the run. I am
terrified, and being cooped up with no freedom is making me feel
trapped. You have to cut me a little slack." At the end of my
tirade I sat down on a fallen log, not caring that my behind might
be soaked through in about two seconds.
“Fine,” he said brusquely, “I have something
that will help with your sanity and serve practical purposes as
well." The way he taunted my sanity made me want to throat punch
him. But if this idea of his allowed me to escape the confines of
the cabin for a while, I was game.
“Alright, what do you have in mind?" I asked
hesitantly. Lord only knew what practical purposes he was referring
to.
“Well, you want to be out of the cabin for a
while, and I need you to know how to escape from here if you need
to. So we are going to do some hiking," he said with a look of
finality in his eyes.
“Hiking, okay, that sounds like something I
can handle," I said.
“I am going to head in and grab the pack you
would take if you were on the run. That way you can get used to the
weight of it while hiking." With that he headed back toward the
cabin, not waiting to see if I would follow.
Sometime between last night and today
something had shifted in his countenance. The easy discourse we had
shared the night before seemingly gone, only to be replaced by a
distant man I barely recognized. Not knowing if it was what had
transpired between us the night before or my having scared him
today that had changed his behavior was unnerving. So, back to
repression I would go. If I repressed it all, then I could just
move forward and not deal with it. I did not possess the energy to
try and fix whatever had broken between us. Not today.
I headed in after him, reaching around to
dust the moss off of my bottom as I went. Yup, one wet hiney. Oh
well, I supposed it would dry while I was hiking to wherever Kennan
thought I should be going.
**********
After Kennan packed everything he thought I
might need, he called me over. He had me stand perfectly still and
placed his hands on either side of my head. I suppressed the urge
to curl into him. He held me in place and chanted something in a
language I did not understand. Suddenly my head felt lighter, like
the strain of the past few days had been lifted.
“What did you do to me, Kennan?" I asked,
not upset, but curious as to what had happened.
“I severed your connection to the outside
for now. You won’t have any visions while we are out. You also
won’t be susceptible to Xavier or anyone else getting into your
head. I can reverse it when we get back to the cabin. But for now
it is necessary. At least until you can learn to block on your
own." He picked up his pack and looked over his shoulder at me with
no hint of a smile. “Grab your gear, we are losing daylight.”
I grabbed my bag and headed out behind him.
I was determined to return his coldness and not show how much his
change had upset me. Instead I resolved myself to follow all of his
instructions and just keep to myself. My mental guard was enough of
a comfort to carry me through
threatening to fall. Kennan closed the distance between us with two
smooth steps and tilted my chin up toward his face.
“I am sorry. I don’t want you to feel like a
prisoner. I just made a promise to your dad and I am doing my very
best to keep that promise. I can’t do that if I don’t know where
you are. Of course you have freedom. But I have to know where you
are. You can’t just leave, sometimes you have to prepare before
going out into the world. There are mental protections I can put in
place when I have enough time. I can shield you from Xavier’s
prying."
“Listen, I get that you are just trying to
protect me. You are trying to keep a promise or whatever. But you
have to understand that a week ago my life was normal. I was just a
bike messenger, living in Chicago, going about my day to day life.
Now I am some sort of prophet, Seer-person on the run. I am
terrified, and being cooped up with no freedom is making me feel
trapped. You have to cut me a little slack." At the end of my
tirade I sat down on a fallen log, not caring that my behind might
be soaked through in about two seconds.
“Fine,” he said brusquely, “I have something
that will help with your sanity and serve practical purposes as
well." The way he taunted my sanity made me want to throat punch
him. But if this idea of his allowed me to escape the confines of
the cabin for a while, I was game.
“Alright, what do you have in mind?" I asked
hesitantly. Lord only knew what practical purposes he was referring
to.
“Well, you want to be out of the cabin for a
while, and I need you to know how to escape from here if you need
to. So we are going to do some hiking," he said with a look of
finality in his eyes.
“Hiking, okay, that sounds like something I
can handle," I said.
“I am going to head in and grab the pack you
would take if you were on the run. That way you can get used to the
weight of it while hiking." With that he headed back toward the
cabin, not waiting to see if I would follow.
Sometime between last night and today
something had shifted in his countenance. The easy discourse we had
shared the night before seemingly gone, only to be replaced by a
distant man I barely recognized. Not knowing if it was what had
transpired between us the night before or my having scared him
today that had changed his behavior was unnerving. So, back to
repression I would go. If I repressed it all, then I could just
move forward and not deal with it. I did not possess the energy to
try and fix whatever had broken between us. Not today.
I headed in after him, reaching around to
dust the moss off of my bottom as I went. Yup, one wet hiney. Oh
well, I supposed it would dry while I was hiking to wherever Kennan
thought I should be going.
**********
After Kennan packed everything he thought I
might need, he called me over. He had me stand perfectly still and
placed his hands on either side of my head. I suppressed the urge
to curl into him. He held me in place and chanted something in a
language I did not understand. Suddenly my head felt lighter, like
the strain of the past few days had been lifted.
“What did you do to me, Kennan?" I asked,
not upset, but curious as to what had happened.
“I severed your connection to the outside
for now. You won’t have any visions while we are out. You also
won’t be susceptible to Xavier or anyone else getting into your
head. I can reverse it when we get back to the cabin. But for now
it is necessary. At least until you can learn to block on your
own." He picked up his pack and looked over his shoulder at me with
no hint of a smile. “Grab your gear, we are losing daylight.”
I grabbed my bag and headed out behind him.
I was determined to return his coldness and not show how much his
change had upset me. Instead I resolved myself to follow all of his
instructions and just keep to myself. My mental guard was enough of
a comfort to carry me through
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