SECRET CRIMES a gripping crime thriller full of suspense by MICHAEL HAMBLING

things through with anyone since I stopped my counselling sessions after I transitioned.’
    ‘Well, if you’re sure you want to continue, that’s fine. But look, why don’t you read me the stuff in your file first? Then decide if you want to tell me the rest of your personal account once we’ve got that out of the way.’
    Rae read through the contents of the personnel file that Sandie Blake had prepared. Then she returned to her story.
    ‘Hettie and I had been together just over a year when we realised that things just couldn’t go on the way they were. I was still feeling depressed, and was feeling physically sick again, just like a few years earlier with the army trials. I was making Hettie miserable. Things came to a head and I told her how I really felt about my life, and my place in the world. The strange thing was, she wasn’t really surprised. She told me how much it all fitted together. It was her that got me to contact a counsellor and a transgender group . . . I walked in on a social event and I suddenly knew I had found my spiritual home. Hettie knew. She came with me, to give me support and she could see how things suddenly fell into place for me. I found inner calm and peace, probably for the first time since my early teens. There was never any doubt in my mind once I’d been for some psychiatric assessments. Some of the other girls who were there for consideration at the same time as me, were discussing possible best answers to questions that might be put to us during the assessments. Trying to outwit the system. I didn’t bother. I just responded with what I felt in my heart and I sailed through, a perfect example of gender dysphoria. I had surgery two years ago and here I am now, just as you see me.’
    ‘Are you still in contact with Hettie?’
    ‘Oh, yes. We’re best friends. She’s getting married next spring and I’m going to be one of her bridesmaids. She met a bit of resistance from her fiancé’s family about it, but being the person she is, she stuck to her guns. I’m looking forward to it, even though I’ll be full of nerves.’
    ‘And have you had any relationships yourself since you transitioned? Have you got close to anyone else?’
    ‘Not really. The problem is that I still don’t like men very much, nor the thought of getting intimate with one. Maybe that would change if I met the right bloke, but he’d probably have to be one in a thousand. I still like women much more, but a lot of lesbians distrust male to female transsexuals. You know, they think we’re pretend women. Maybe that’s true in a way. Anyway, the right man hasn’t appeared yet, though I still think it’s more likely to be a woman. Or maybe a TS man. I met quite a few during the group counselling sessions.’
    ‘Bernie, who I worked with for a while in the Midlands, had similar thoughts about relationships. He’s the female to male TS I mentioned earlier. I think he’s found someone now, though I don’t know the details. We’re not in contact any more. Well I hope things work out for you, Rae, especially with the job. As I said earlier, you’re joining us at a hectic time and you’re going to be too tired for anything much.’ Sophie smiled wryly. ‘I’m already running on adrenalin, and it’s only two days since we discovered the body.’
    * * *
    On arriving in the incident room, Sophie introduced Rae to Marsh and Melsom, and then showed her to her desk. She called Barry Marsh into her office and explained Rae’s situation.
    ‘No one else is to know at the moment, Barry. Just you and me, as her superiors. Under no circumstances can you talk about this to anyone else. If anyone asks, do not confirm it. Instead, just sidestep the question and speculate. Her deep voice could be due to childhood tonsillitis. Anything else could be put down to possible hormonal problems. What I’m saying is that it’s better to have a response ready prepared than to be caught on the hop. If there are issues with