shoulders stiffened but Jamal didn't move.
"I didn't go to Eros for any of this—for us. I went to get away from the major city and the tabloids and the crazy.
When I came to Eros I meant to stay in my room, order room service and just be—maybe, once in a while pop out for a run so I don't get rusty. But Chase suggested Anatolis and I met you and all the plans I had—or lack thereof changed. I could tuck my tail between my legs and run away. Or I could say that it hasn't been enough time between the time we met and the way I feel now. Or I could face the fact that without you I'll be miserable and just lay it all on the line."
"You can't mean that." Savaro turned. "You have your career and I have Anatolis."
"Didn't you hear? I can sign wherever I want next year." Jamal shrugged. "Not to toot my own horn, but right now every team wants me. And I have a little boy who would love to have me play with the Phantoms."
"Yeah right. When it comes to basketball the Phantoms are babies compared to the major teams you've obviously played for. They could never afford to pay you half as much as you're used to."
"It didn't start out being about the money. It started out with love and then somewhere along the way things just spun out of control. I don't need the money. I may not own a private jet but I have enough money to last me the rest of my life and then some. Look, Savaro. I can play anywhere.
I can play for the Moussa Phantoms, or the Eros City Bears and make the same amount at home or just an hour away.
I've been trying to get out of New York for years now—it's too much living there. This isn't about the basketball anymore. It's not even about what I want anymore. This is now about you and what you want."
"I may be a little fuzzy and completely missed you saying it earlier—but what do you want?"
"I want you. I want a relationship, one where the man I love misses me in his bed so much that he tries to blackmail me back Hell, I want a man whose bed I don't want to leave for anything in the world. That's what I feel with you. Come on, Savaro, look at me. You asked me what I wanted, right? So why don't you like the answer?"
"That's not it."
"Then why…" Jamal trailed off walking over to Savaro. Using his thumb, he lifted Savaro's chin but Savaro's eyes were closed. "Why won't you look at me?"
"I can't."
Stepping in close, Jamal cradled Savaro's cheeks
and brushed his lips across Savaro's closed eyelids. He trailed his mouth against Savaro's forehead then down his nose. "It's not hard for you to see it, is it? The way I feel about you. But I won't say it if it will cause you pain—I can't. I don't want to see the hurt in your face anymore."
Savaro held on to his hands and Jamal trembled
from where Savaro held him. Jamal closed his eyes, feeling the warmth coming from his lover's body. The realization hit him Savaro hadn't said anything. Inhaling he released him. "All right. I'll go take a quick shower then head back to the hospital with Mom."
Walking to the pile of clothes with the tags on them, Jamal silently rummaged through until he found a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. He was reaching for a razor when he was grabbed from behind and tugged around. The clothes he held slipped from his fingers and he landed on his back on the bed. He looked up just in time to have Savaro climb over him, pinning him to the bed. Jamal's first instincts were to fight, but looking into Savaro's eyes paralyzed him.
His heart hammered in his chest. His palms grew sweaty and his arousal pressed against the front of his pants.
"Sav?"
"Listen to me." Savaro leant in, brushed his lips across Jamal's forehead. "I want you—every part of you. I may be slow in admitting it but you have to understand.
The only men who've ever been there and not broken my heart have been my brothers and my father."
"It's hard for you to trust—I get it."
"Do you? Do you really? Because I don't want you to be taken by surprise by me being strange and
"I didn't go to Eros for any of this—for us. I went to get away from the major city and the tabloids and the crazy.
When I came to Eros I meant to stay in my room, order room service and just be—maybe, once in a while pop out for a run so I don't get rusty. But Chase suggested Anatolis and I met you and all the plans I had—or lack thereof changed. I could tuck my tail between my legs and run away. Or I could say that it hasn't been enough time between the time we met and the way I feel now. Or I could face the fact that without you I'll be miserable and just lay it all on the line."
"You can't mean that." Savaro turned. "You have your career and I have Anatolis."
"Didn't you hear? I can sign wherever I want next year." Jamal shrugged. "Not to toot my own horn, but right now every team wants me. And I have a little boy who would love to have me play with the Phantoms."
"Yeah right. When it comes to basketball the Phantoms are babies compared to the major teams you've obviously played for. They could never afford to pay you half as much as you're used to."
"It didn't start out being about the money. It started out with love and then somewhere along the way things just spun out of control. I don't need the money. I may not own a private jet but I have enough money to last me the rest of my life and then some. Look, Savaro. I can play anywhere.
I can play for the Moussa Phantoms, or the Eros City Bears and make the same amount at home or just an hour away.
I've been trying to get out of New York for years now—it's too much living there. This isn't about the basketball anymore. It's not even about what I want anymore. This is now about you and what you want."
"I may be a little fuzzy and completely missed you saying it earlier—but what do you want?"
"I want you. I want a relationship, one where the man I love misses me in his bed so much that he tries to blackmail me back Hell, I want a man whose bed I don't want to leave for anything in the world. That's what I feel with you. Come on, Savaro, look at me. You asked me what I wanted, right? So why don't you like the answer?"
"That's not it."
"Then why…" Jamal trailed off walking over to Savaro. Using his thumb, he lifted Savaro's chin but Savaro's eyes were closed. "Why won't you look at me?"
"I can't."
Stepping in close, Jamal cradled Savaro's cheeks
and brushed his lips across Savaro's closed eyelids. He trailed his mouth against Savaro's forehead then down his nose. "It's not hard for you to see it, is it? The way I feel about you. But I won't say it if it will cause you pain—I can't. I don't want to see the hurt in your face anymore."
Savaro held on to his hands and Jamal trembled
from where Savaro held him. Jamal closed his eyes, feeling the warmth coming from his lover's body. The realization hit him Savaro hadn't said anything. Inhaling he released him. "All right. I'll go take a quick shower then head back to the hospital with Mom."
Walking to the pile of clothes with the tags on them, Jamal silently rummaged through until he found a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. He was reaching for a razor when he was grabbed from behind and tugged around. The clothes he held slipped from his fingers and he landed on his back on the bed. He looked up just in time to have Savaro climb over him, pinning him to the bed. Jamal's first instincts were to fight, but looking into Savaro's eyes paralyzed him.
His heart hammered in his chest. His palms grew sweaty and his arousal pressed against the front of his pants.
"Sav?"
"Listen to me." Savaro leant in, brushed his lips across Jamal's forehead. "I want you—every part of you. I may be slow in admitting it but you have to understand.
The only men who've ever been there and not broken my heart have been my brothers and my father."
"It's hard for you to trust—I get it."
"Do you? Do you really? Because I don't want you to be taken by surprise by me being strange and
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