me as
soon as you left. When you called Molly, she called your mother who called me.
So, I volunteered to come and check on you.”
“So, what? Y’all are my
watch dogs now? Is that what this is?” Taking a step towards JT’s grave, I touch
the cold granite once more. “Can you give me a minute, please?”
“I’ll wait at your car,” he
says.
He walks back our vehicles,
but I never look away from JT’s tombstone. “I guess this is goodbye for now.
You were my first love, my best friend, and my fairytale prince. If you are up
there listening, know that I loved you. I’ll always love you.” Squatting down,
I kiss my fingertips and press them against his name. I glance across the pond
to confirm no one is there, and I stand up. My spine tingles with the feeling
that someone is watching me, but it must be from Kane who is standing against
my car.
The temperature has dropped
since the sun set. Walking back to my car, I rub my arms, trying to warm them.
Kane leans against my yellow Ford Mustang with his denim-covered legs crossed
in front of him. His hands rest on either side, and he’s wearing a beige
cable-knit sweater that emphasizes his physique. A pair of dark sunglasses
adorns his face. As I get closer, he glances down at me. His sunglasses slide down
his nose, but with one finger, he pushes them back up.
“Kane, you can’t babysit me.
I appreciate the thought, but I don’t want that.”
“Who said anything about
babysitting? Listen, your mom, Molly, and I just want to make sure you realize
that if you need anyone to talk to, we’re here.”
“Ugh..,” I turn to walk away
but quickly change my mind and turn back around. “So, what? Are you all going
to follow me around wherever I go? Are you going to cancel your dates when my
mom or Molly calls you on watch duty? Or wait, I’ve got it, are you going to
chaperone me when I go on dates?”
“Who are you planning on
dating?” he asks through gritted teeth.
“Are you kidding me? No one
for now, but you can’t do this. Damn, I can’t do this. Listen to me, I promised
Cal that I wouldn’t try anything stupid again, and I will keep that promise.
You can believe that. No need to worry.”
“Wait. What are you saying,
Jay? You made a promise to Cal that you wouldn’t kill yourself?”
“Yes, that is what I am
saying. So see, you don’t have to worry. You can go on living your life, no
need to concern yourself with mine.”
“You are a piece of work,
Jay. Are you listening to what you are saying? You better find reasons to live
for you because otherwise, what kind of life is that?” Rubbing his temples with
his hands, he mutters, “Get in your car and go home. I’ll follow you.”
“You don’t have to
follow...,” I don’t get to finish.
“Get in your damn car. NOW!”
he yells.
His face flushes red with
anger, so I decide that this may not be the time to push him. I crank my car
and follow the lonely road out of the cemetery. The headlights of his Chrysler
Crossfire gleam in my rear view mirror. What does he want from me? I don’t want
him like this -- a protective big-brother figure? Hell no. Not going to happen.
My mother and Molly are going to hear from me. This is going to stop today.
Arriving home, I pull my car
into the garage. Kane doesn’t get out; he barely even stops before driving off.
I slam my door. I’m so freaking annoyed. I want to kick something or actually
someone: a bossy green-eyed someone to be exact. Rearing back my foot, I kick
the tire. “Ouch!” I jump around on my good foot as pain radiates through the
other.
“Jay, is everything okay?”
My mother and father are
standing in the doorway, staring at me.
“No, I’m not okay. I think I
broke a toe.”
I hear a guff of laughter
from my mom, “That’s what you get for kicking your car.”
Shaking my head, I know she
is right. I’m pissed at myself for being stupid and acting childish and
immature. I can’t help but laugh at myself. “Yeah,
soon as you left. When you called Molly, she called your mother who called me.
So, I volunteered to come and check on you.”
“So, what? Y’all are my
watch dogs now? Is that what this is?” Taking a step towards JT’s grave, I touch
the cold granite once more. “Can you give me a minute, please?”
“I’ll wait at your car,” he
says.
He walks back our vehicles,
but I never look away from JT’s tombstone. “I guess this is goodbye for now.
You were my first love, my best friend, and my fairytale prince. If you are up
there listening, know that I loved you. I’ll always love you.” Squatting down,
I kiss my fingertips and press them against his name. I glance across the pond
to confirm no one is there, and I stand up. My spine tingles with the feeling
that someone is watching me, but it must be from Kane who is standing against
my car.
The temperature has dropped
since the sun set. Walking back to my car, I rub my arms, trying to warm them.
Kane leans against my yellow Ford Mustang with his denim-covered legs crossed
in front of him. His hands rest on either side, and he’s wearing a beige
cable-knit sweater that emphasizes his physique. A pair of dark sunglasses
adorns his face. As I get closer, he glances down at me. His sunglasses slide down
his nose, but with one finger, he pushes them back up.
“Kane, you can’t babysit me.
I appreciate the thought, but I don’t want that.”
“Who said anything about
babysitting? Listen, your mom, Molly, and I just want to make sure you realize
that if you need anyone to talk to, we’re here.”
“Ugh..,” I turn to walk away
but quickly change my mind and turn back around. “So, what? Are you all going
to follow me around wherever I go? Are you going to cancel your dates when my
mom or Molly calls you on watch duty? Or wait, I’ve got it, are you going to
chaperone me when I go on dates?”
“Who are you planning on
dating?” he asks through gritted teeth.
“Are you kidding me? No one
for now, but you can’t do this. Damn, I can’t do this. Listen to me, I promised
Cal that I wouldn’t try anything stupid again, and I will keep that promise.
You can believe that. No need to worry.”
“Wait. What are you saying,
Jay? You made a promise to Cal that you wouldn’t kill yourself?”
“Yes, that is what I am
saying. So see, you don’t have to worry. You can go on living your life, no
need to concern yourself with mine.”
“You are a piece of work,
Jay. Are you listening to what you are saying? You better find reasons to live
for you because otherwise, what kind of life is that?” Rubbing his temples with
his hands, he mutters, “Get in your car and go home. I’ll follow you.”
“You don’t have to
follow...,” I don’t get to finish.
“Get in your damn car. NOW!”
he yells.
His face flushes red with
anger, so I decide that this may not be the time to push him. I crank my car
and follow the lonely road out of the cemetery. The headlights of his Chrysler
Crossfire gleam in my rear view mirror. What does he want from me? I don’t want
him like this -- a protective big-brother figure? Hell no. Not going to happen.
My mother and Molly are going to hear from me. This is going to stop today.
Arriving home, I pull my car
into the garage. Kane doesn’t get out; he barely even stops before driving off.
I slam my door. I’m so freaking annoyed. I want to kick something or actually
someone: a bossy green-eyed someone to be exact. Rearing back my foot, I kick
the tire. “Ouch!” I jump around on my good foot as pain radiates through the
other.
“Jay, is everything okay?”
My mother and father are
standing in the doorway, staring at me.
“No, I’m not okay. I think I
broke a toe.”
I hear a guff of laughter
from my mom, “That’s what you get for kicking your car.”
Shaking my head, I know she
is right. I’m pissed at myself for being stupid and acting childish and
immature. I can’t help but laugh at myself. “Yeah,
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