had shared, I shivered.
Grandfather was lying on his bed. Next to him, Richard sat in a chair. They both clambered to their feet when I paused in the doorway.
"May I come in?" I asked.
"Of course, child," Grandfather said.
Logan waited outside the room.
Grandfather hugged me and kissed my hair. "My poor child, you must think that all men are beasts. I would not have you harmed for the world."
"Please don't worry," I said into his chest. "I'm pretty tough, you know. But I'm so very sorry―"
"I know, child. We all are."
When Grandfather relaxed, I left his arms and went to Richard. "I'm so glad you're here, cousin."
I gave him a hug and he moved awkwardly into my arms. I wondered if this was the first time he had ever embraced a woman.
"Where will Ivan go?" I asked when he released me.
Grandfather frowned and quickly closed the door.
I'd forgotten about Logan, who would serve not only as guard, but also as Sargon's spy.
"South, to find Cedric," Richard said. "That's what I would do."
Cedric. The name always gave me a chill.
"He doesn't blame you," Grandfather said. "He knows what sacrifice you made to save his life. We all were there. He loathes himself for failing you and leaving you to that wolf."
Wolf?
"I acted rashly commanding you to marry Ivan," he added. "I should have waited, knowing what the others might do." He sighed. "We could have saved a lot of trouble if I'd thought that through. Sargon should have had his chance at the start. It was his right, as king."
"I know you were acting in my best interests, Grandfather. Don't blame yourself for this."
"Oh, but I do. It is a bitter alliance now, with you a carnal prize. How I have failed you."
So that was how they saw me―as a carnal prize.
This annoyed me, but I also saw the irony. Here I was, a modern woman shocked that I had been with three men in such a short time, yet my own kin seemed to think this was perfectly understandable. Maybe it was , under the circumstances. They didn't blame me for my actions, nor think that I should feel shame.
Values were different here.
But a prize?
Gareth had never thought of me that way. As much as it distressed me, I knew that Sargon saw me as more than a prize to be won. I was the future of this world.
"Grandfather, I am not fragile," I assured him. "I don't faint at the sight of a naked man. Never fear. I come from a long line of strong women."
I averted my eyes. Best he not see my fear.
"Good girl," he said, his voice stronger. "My pride in you grows and grows. Now brace yourself, my dear. I have more bad news."
My heart sank. "What?"
"Tonight is for grieving. The king allows us that. But tomorrow there will be a celebration, a feast. You must prepare yourself and behave with poise and deference." He paused a moment, searching for the right words. "You must respond to his call."
I nodded, not trusting my voice. How could I remain with a man who insisted on complete control of me?
I sensed discomfort in the room. "There's something more?"
Richard cleared his throat. "Jon rode away with Ivan this afternoon."
"No," I cried, sitting on the bed.
"We are a house divided," Grandfather said, a tear rolling down his wrinkled cheek.
When I left the room, I said to Logan, "Can we visit my horse?"
He shook his head and gave an uncomfortable grimace. "I've been given orders to keep you inside the castle at night. You can go to the royal chambers or return to your old room, if you want."
"Can you give me a tour of the castle instead? I'd love to see the kitchens and the public rooms."
He brightened. "And I could take you to my aunt's wardrobe, so you can choose more clothing."
"Let's do that first." Perhaps new garments would cheer me up.
We climbed the third floor stairs and walked a short distance to another room like mine. It appeared to be unoccupied. There was a full-length mirror at one end and a wardrobe beside it.
"Look here," Logan said. He opened the doors.
"Yes!" I clapped my
Grandfather was lying on his bed. Next to him, Richard sat in a chair. They both clambered to their feet when I paused in the doorway.
"May I come in?" I asked.
"Of course, child," Grandfather said.
Logan waited outside the room.
Grandfather hugged me and kissed my hair. "My poor child, you must think that all men are beasts. I would not have you harmed for the world."
"Please don't worry," I said into his chest. "I'm pretty tough, you know. But I'm so very sorry―"
"I know, child. We all are."
When Grandfather relaxed, I left his arms and went to Richard. "I'm so glad you're here, cousin."
I gave him a hug and he moved awkwardly into my arms. I wondered if this was the first time he had ever embraced a woman.
"Where will Ivan go?" I asked when he released me.
Grandfather frowned and quickly closed the door.
I'd forgotten about Logan, who would serve not only as guard, but also as Sargon's spy.
"South, to find Cedric," Richard said. "That's what I would do."
Cedric. The name always gave me a chill.
"He doesn't blame you," Grandfather said. "He knows what sacrifice you made to save his life. We all were there. He loathes himself for failing you and leaving you to that wolf."
Wolf?
"I acted rashly commanding you to marry Ivan," he added. "I should have waited, knowing what the others might do." He sighed. "We could have saved a lot of trouble if I'd thought that through. Sargon should have had his chance at the start. It was his right, as king."
"I know you were acting in my best interests, Grandfather. Don't blame yourself for this."
"Oh, but I do. It is a bitter alliance now, with you a carnal prize. How I have failed you."
So that was how they saw me―as a carnal prize.
This annoyed me, but I also saw the irony. Here I was, a modern woman shocked that I had been with three men in such a short time, yet my own kin seemed to think this was perfectly understandable. Maybe it was , under the circumstances. They didn't blame me for my actions, nor think that I should feel shame.
Values were different here.
But a prize?
Gareth had never thought of me that way. As much as it distressed me, I knew that Sargon saw me as more than a prize to be won. I was the future of this world.
"Grandfather, I am not fragile," I assured him. "I don't faint at the sight of a naked man. Never fear. I come from a long line of strong women."
I averted my eyes. Best he not see my fear.
"Good girl," he said, his voice stronger. "My pride in you grows and grows. Now brace yourself, my dear. I have more bad news."
My heart sank. "What?"
"Tonight is for grieving. The king allows us that. But tomorrow there will be a celebration, a feast. You must prepare yourself and behave with poise and deference." He paused a moment, searching for the right words. "You must respond to his call."
I nodded, not trusting my voice. How could I remain with a man who insisted on complete control of me?
I sensed discomfort in the room. "There's something more?"
Richard cleared his throat. "Jon rode away with Ivan this afternoon."
"No," I cried, sitting on the bed.
"We are a house divided," Grandfather said, a tear rolling down his wrinkled cheek.
When I left the room, I said to Logan, "Can we visit my horse?"
He shook his head and gave an uncomfortable grimace. "I've been given orders to keep you inside the castle at night. You can go to the royal chambers or return to your old room, if you want."
"Can you give me a tour of the castle instead? I'd love to see the kitchens and the public rooms."
He brightened. "And I could take you to my aunt's wardrobe, so you can choose more clothing."
"Let's do that first." Perhaps new garments would cheer me up.
We climbed the third floor stairs and walked a short distance to another room like mine. It appeared to be unoccupied. There was a full-length mirror at one end and a wardrobe beside it.
"Look here," Logan said. He opened the doors.
"Yes!" I clapped my
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