you warm enough?’ I asked. ‘I’ll get you a robe or something if you like.’
‘That would be nice,’ she said. ‘It is kind of chilly in here.’ I went back into the bedroom and found her dressing-gown hanging behind the door and carried it back through to the kitchen. I put it on her like I would do for my own little girl.
‘I find it hard to think of you as a father,’ she said as if reading my mind.
‘I was a good father.’
‘Was?’
‘Was, is, who knows? I don’t get much chance to practise these days, except with those cats.’
‘Oh God, Nick, I wish it hadn’t happened.’
‘What, the cats?’ I asked, although I knew fully well she didn’t mean them.
‘No, us.’
‘You keep saying that.’
‘I keep feeling it.’
‘Is there someone back in the States?’ I asked. ‘You never said.’
‘Yes, no . . . sort of.’
‘You don’t sound very sure.’
‘Can’t you tell that I’m not? I’m not sure about anything.’
‘I’m sure about one thing,’ I said. ‘I’m not going to let you go.’
‘You may have to.’
‘Never.’
‘That’s a long time, Nick, a long, long time.’ She paused. ‘I think I’d better tell you everything.’
I looked at her and she looked away. I didn’t know what was coming but I knew it was going to be difficult for her, so I turned round to make the coffee as she started.
‘First of all,’ she said to my back, ‘my real name isn’t Josephine Cass.’
I put down the spoon I was holding and turned back.
‘It almost is but not quite. I’m not on the run, don’t worry.’
‘What is it then?’ I asked as I carried the cups over to the table and sat opposite her.
‘Josephina Cassini. A real guinea name, huh?’
‘If you say so,’ I replied.
‘I changed it when I went to college.’
‘Why?’
‘You wouldn’t know of course, but the Cassini are big men in the Mob.’
‘The what?’
‘The Mob, Cosa Nostra, the Mafia, whatever you like to call it, though they’ll deny it. Businessmen they call themselves.’
‘Are you kidding me?’
‘Do I look like I am?’ And she didn’t. She sat there hunched up in her robe holding onto the cup of coffee like dear life itself.
‘No, sweetheart,’ I said, ‘you don’t.’ And I touched her shoulder across the table.
‘I can’t handle it you see. Never could since I first found out what “The Business” meant. I love my family but I left them the first chance I got. I went to New York, then California, now here.’
‘And on the way you dumped your name?’
‘I know it sounds strange Nick, but I just can’t bear to be part of all that. I have some money of my own that my mother left me, money her mother left her. It’s clean money.’
‘What does your father think of all this?’
‘He’s unhappy, of course,’ she said. ‘But he has my brother and he thinks I’ll come to heel and return to the fortress.’
‘What fortress?’
‘That’s what I call where we live, the family home. It’s like a fortress full of armed men, but discreetly armed if you know what I mean.’
‘I think I can guess. And the someone you left behind?’
‘One of Daddy’s men. No, more than that. Daddy wouldn’t want me involved with a mere soldier. Frederick is the son of a good friend, a business associate of my father’s. He’ll do well in the business, go far, and he wanted to marry me.’
‘You weren’t so keen?’
‘I’d never marry Freddy.’
I got up from the table and took two cigarettes from a packet on the dresser. I lit them both and gave one to Jo. She pulled on it gratefully. I found an ashtray in one of the cupboards and placed it on the centre of the table, between us.
‘Did your family put pressure on you?’ I asked when we were settled again.
‘They’d like to see me barefoot and pregnant, married to one of the up-and-comers, so I split.’
‘Just like that?’
She laughed a mirthless laugh. ‘The family is strong, but we don’t live in the
‘That would be nice,’ she said. ‘It is kind of chilly in here.’ I went back into the bedroom and found her dressing-gown hanging behind the door and carried it back through to the kitchen. I put it on her like I would do for my own little girl.
‘I find it hard to think of you as a father,’ she said as if reading my mind.
‘I was a good father.’
‘Was?’
‘Was, is, who knows? I don’t get much chance to practise these days, except with those cats.’
‘Oh God, Nick, I wish it hadn’t happened.’
‘What, the cats?’ I asked, although I knew fully well she didn’t mean them.
‘No, us.’
‘You keep saying that.’
‘I keep feeling it.’
‘Is there someone back in the States?’ I asked. ‘You never said.’
‘Yes, no . . . sort of.’
‘You don’t sound very sure.’
‘Can’t you tell that I’m not? I’m not sure about anything.’
‘I’m sure about one thing,’ I said. ‘I’m not going to let you go.’
‘You may have to.’
‘Never.’
‘That’s a long time, Nick, a long, long time.’ She paused. ‘I think I’d better tell you everything.’
I looked at her and she looked away. I didn’t know what was coming but I knew it was going to be difficult for her, so I turned round to make the coffee as she started.
‘First of all,’ she said to my back, ‘my real name isn’t Josephine Cass.’
I put down the spoon I was holding and turned back.
‘It almost is but not quite. I’m not on the run, don’t worry.’
‘What is it then?’ I asked as I carried the cups over to the table and sat opposite her.
‘Josephina Cassini. A real guinea name, huh?’
‘If you say so,’ I replied.
‘I changed it when I went to college.’
‘Why?’
‘You wouldn’t know of course, but the Cassini are big men in the Mob.’
‘The what?’
‘The Mob, Cosa Nostra, the Mafia, whatever you like to call it, though they’ll deny it. Businessmen they call themselves.’
‘Are you kidding me?’
‘Do I look like I am?’ And she didn’t. She sat there hunched up in her robe holding onto the cup of coffee like dear life itself.
‘No, sweetheart,’ I said, ‘you don’t.’ And I touched her shoulder across the table.
‘I can’t handle it you see. Never could since I first found out what “The Business” meant. I love my family but I left them the first chance I got. I went to New York, then California, now here.’
‘And on the way you dumped your name?’
‘I know it sounds strange Nick, but I just can’t bear to be part of all that. I have some money of my own that my mother left me, money her mother left her. It’s clean money.’
‘What does your father think of all this?’
‘He’s unhappy, of course,’ she said. ‘But he has my brother and he thinks I’ll come to heel and return to the fortress.’
‘What fortress?’
‘That’s what I call where we live, the family home. It’s like a fortress full of armed men, but discreetly armed if you know what I mean.’
‘I think I can guess. And the someone you left behind?’
‘One of Daddy’s men. No, more than that. Daddy wouldn’t want me involved with a mere soldier. Frederick is the son of a good friend, a business associate of my father’s. He’ll do well in the business, go far, and he wanted to marry me.’
‘You weren’t so keen?’
‘I’d never marry Freddy.’
I got up from the table and took two cigarettes from a packet on the dresser. I lit them both and gave one to Jo. She pulled on it gratefully. I found an ashtray in one of the cupboards and placed it on the centre of the table, between us.
‘Did your family put pressure on you?’ I asked when we were settled again.
‘They’d like to see me barefoot and pregnant, married to one of the up-and-comers, so I split.’
‘Just like that?’
She laughed a mirthless laugh. ‘The family is strong, but we don’t live in the
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