picked up his cup. He probably had one chance to talk his way out of being gutted by a psycho and he wanted an extra second to think about how to do it.
âTrish, listen â¦â
âYes?â
âEh ⦠Trish ⦠I donât know where we met before.â He had his free hand up in supplication. âBut Iâm very sorry if things didnât work out.â
âWhat?â
âIâm just saying, like ⦠Iâm sorry if I ⦠yâknow â¦â
âAesop, I have something for you.â
She slowly reached into the bag at her feet and suddenly pulled out something shiny.
Chapter Seven
Jimmy sat bolt upright in the bed. Someone was trying to bang down his front door. Jesus, the cops were right. She was coming after him now. That stupid fucker Aesop and his uncontainable dick were finally going to get him killed. Thereâd been close calls before â angry boyfriends, outraged brothers and mates, the girls themselves fuming and upset â but this was the big one. Heâd finally managed to stoke up a nutter and now she was coming after Jimmy because she hadnât managed to catch Aesop yet. The bastard. It wasnât fair! Jimmy was always nice to women. He sat in terror for a second. The thumping downstairs wasnât letting up. He had to get out of bed and try and protect himself before she broke down the door and cornered him. The doorbell started ringing now too. Christ. He was fucked. And he only had his jocks on.
He started down the stairs with his pillow clutched to his chest and the blood roaring through his head. Then he heard the voice outside, whispering in hoarse, guttural panic.
âJimmy? Jimmy? Open the fucking door quick!â
âAesop?â
âYeah Aesop. Open the fucking door!â
Jimmy was standing right at the door.
âWhoâs out there?â
âIâm fucking out here. Will you open the door?â
âIs there anyone else?â
âWhat? No. I hope not anyway. Will you hurry up for fuck sake before she finds me?â
âJesus â¦â
Jimmy pulled the door open and Aesop barrelled through it, knocking Jimmy onto the floor and standing on his arm as he slammed the door closed again and ran into the kitchen. Jimmy was still picking himself up when Aesop appeared back in the hall with a big bread knife.
âYe fuckinâ bastard,â grunted Jimmy, crouched over and rubbing his shoulder.
âShush Jimmy,â said Aesop, looking through the peephole. He was sweating like a racehorse, his breath coming hard and heavy.
âWhat the fuck happened?â
âIt was Trish.â
âWho?â
âFucking Trish! Normanâs bird. The culchie.â
âWhat about her?â
âSheâs the one whoâs been after me. I must have rode her.â
âWhat? Are you sure?â
âYeah! She came around tonight and tried to stab me, the mad bitch. I let her in and everything. Jesus, see what happens when Norman scores? He shouldnât be let near women. He canât get a bird for years and then when he does pick one up, sheâs the Angel of fucking Death.â
âYouâre mad. Trish was lovely. How did she try and stab you?â
âHow? She had a knife in her bag! Oh Jesus, man, what are we going to do?â
âCalm down, will you? Jesus. Okay. Weâre going to call the police. Fuck, we better call Norman too. Now tell me what happened will you?â
âYeah ⦠yeah. I was just ⦠I was ⦠whatâs with the pillow?â
âWhat? Oh ⦠I was in bed when you started going at the door with a bleedinâ sledgehammer.â
âAnd you brought your pillow down with you? What were you going to do with it?â
âI wasnât fucking thinking, was I? I thought there was a madwoman out there.â
âAnd you were going to subdue her with a pillow?â
âWill you fuck off? I got a
âTrish, listen â¦â
âYes?â
âEh ⦠Trish ⦠I donât know where we met before.â He had his free hand up in supplication. âBut Iâm very sorry if things didnât work out.â
âWhat?â
âIâm just saying, like ⦠Iâm sorry if I ⦠yâknow â¦â
âAesop, I have something for you.â
She slowly reached into the bag at her feet and suddenly pulled out something shiny.
Chapter Seven
Jimmy sat bolt upright in the bed. Someone was trying to bang down his front door. Jesus, the cops were right. She was coming after him now. That stupid fucker Aesop and his uncontainable dick were finally going to get him killed. Thereâd been close calls before â angry boyfriends, outraged brothers and mates, the girls themselves fuming and upset â but this was the big one. Heâd finally managed to stoke up a nutter and now she was coming after Jimmy because she hadnât managed to catch Aesop yet. The bastard. It wasnât fair! Jimmy was always nice to women. He sat in terror for a second. The thumping downstairs wasnât letting up. He had to get out of bed and try and protect himself before she broke down the door and cornered him. The doorbell started ringing now too. Christ. He was fucked. And he only had his jocks on.
He started down the stairs with his pillow clutched to his chest and the blood roaring through his head. Then he heard the voice outside, whispering in hoarse, guttural panic.
âJimmy? Jimmy? Open the fucking door quick!â
âAesop?â
âYeah Aesop. Open the fucking door!â
Jimmy was standing right at the door.
âWhoâs out there?â
âIâm fucking out here. Will you open the door?â
âIs there anyone else?â
âWhat? No. I hope not anyway. Will you hurry up for fuck sake before she finds me?â
âJesus â¦â
Jimmy pulled the door open and Aesop barrelled through it, knocking Jimmy onto the floor and standing on his arm as he slammed the door closed again and ran into the kitchen. Jimmy was still picking himself up when Aesop appeared back in the hall with a big bread knife.
âYe fuckinâ bastard,â grunted Jimmy, crouched over and rubbing his shoulder.
âShush Jimmy,â said Aesop, looking through the peephole. He was sweating like a racehorse, his breath coming hard and heavy.
âWhat the fuck happened?â
âIt was Trish.â
âWho?â
âFucking Trish! Normanâs bird. The culchie.â
âWhat about her?â
âSheâs the one whoâs been after me. I must have rode her.â
âWhat? Are you sure?â
âYeah! She came around tonight and tried to stab me, the mad bitch. I let her in and everything. Jesus, see what happens when Norman scores? He shouldnât be let near women. He canât get a bird for years and then when he does pick one up, sheâs the Angel of fucking Death.â
âYouâre mad. Trish was lovely. How did she try and stab you?â
âHow? She had a knife in her bag! Oh Jesus, man, what are we going to do?â
âCalm down, will you? Jesus. Okay. Weâre going to call the police. Fuck, we better call Norman too. Now tell me what happened will you?â
âYeah ⦠yeah. I was just ⦠I was ⦠whatâs with the pillow?â
âWhat? Oh ⦠I was in bed when you started going at the door with a bleedinâ sledgehammer.â
âAnd you brought your pillow down with you? What were you going to do with it?â
âI wasnât fucking thinking, was I? I thought there was a madwoman out there.â
âAnd you were going to subdue her with a pillow?â
âWill you fuck off? I got a
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