marriage? Our family ?” I moved my arm back and forth between the two of us. Cassie only stood there, silent, as I continued on my tirade. “Shit, Cassie! Why now?”
Her eyes finally registered a sliver of remorse as they locked with mine. “It's not that I don't want to work on our marriage. I would love to be able to go back in time and fix it before it got to its breaking point. But we can't.”
“So, what? You want out?” I was furious that everything seemed so far out of my control.
Cassie's soft hand brushed my cheek. “Is that what you want?” she asked in a voice so small I almost didn't hear it.
“Of course not,” I responded. “I want things to go back to the way they were.”
Cassie inhaled deeply. “So do I, but we can't ignore the things that brought us to where we are now. We need to come to terms with them in hopes of being able to move forward. We need to keep Charlie's best interest at heart.”
“That's all I have been doing!” I shouted, moving away from her touch. To hear her disregard how much I actually did for our child on a daily basis seriously pissed me off. I was the one that was there day-in and day-out taking care of her. I was the one who ran to her bedside when she had a bad dream. I was a single father, regardless of the fact that I was married to our daughter's absent mother. How completely fucked up was that?
When I was certain I could keep my temper in check, I spoke. “She needs parents, Cassie. Parents…plural. Not one, but two .”
“I couldn't agree more,” Cassie responded with a small shrug. “I want to be there for her.” Her voice cracked as the tears streamed down her cheeks and she wiped them away furiously. “God! What I wouldn't give to sit with her on the couch and read to her…or even just hold her and ask her about her day!”
I rushed toward her, wrapping my hands gently around her biceps. “Then do those things. It's not too late.”
She struggled to free herself, her eyes wild as she moved to the other side of the room. “But it is! I fucked up, Jack!”
With the shake of my head, I furrowed my brow. “Regardless of whether or not you fucked up, you can change your relationship with her. Be there now .”
That was when Cassie shut down. The expression on her face went blank and her shoulders slumped ever-so-slightly. The room was filled with an uncomfortable silence as we stood staring at each other. Cassie's breathing was still shaking with the sobs that were slowly dying. Seconds turned to minutes before her eyes finally locked with mine. Without a word, she quietly moved forward, reaching out to place a hand on my chest.
I pulled away and turned from her, running my hands through my hair as I tried to absorb all that had been said between us. I walked to the mantle and placed my hands on it before slumping forward in defeat.
“I'm so lost, Jack,” Cassie whispered. I could feel her presence right behind me, and it took everything in me not to turn around and embrace her…not to kiss away this whole messed up night. “I don't know where to go from here.” The pain in her voice broke my heart, and my chest tightened as I turned to face her. Her big brown eyes were red and swollen from crying, and she was sniffling against the residual sobs that refused to relent.
“Go?” I asked incredulously. “Cassie, you're not going anywhere.” I cupped her face in my hands and looked into her fear-filled eyes.
She brought her hands up to encircle my wrists. “Jack—” I quickly pressed my lips to hers to silence her. “You really want me to stay?” she mumbled against my mouth before pulling back slightly, her chilled hands circling my wrists.
I shook my head, but not in disagreement. “No, I need you to stay. I can't ever be without you.” I rested my forehead against hers and inhaled deeply, my eyes closing as everything Cassie consumed me. “How can you be so ready to give up on this?”
“Because everything that's
Her eyes finally registered a sliver of remorse as they locked with mine. “It's not that I don't want to work on our marriage. I would love to be able to go back in time and fix it before it got to its breaking point. But we can't.”
“So, what? You want out?” I was furious that everything seemed so far out of my control.
Cassie's soft hand brushed my cheek. “Is that what you want?” she asked in a voice so small I almost didn't hear it.
“Of course not,” I responded. “I want things to go back to the way they were.”
Cassie inhaled deeply. “So do I, but we can't ignore the things that brought us to where we are now. We need to come to terms with them in hopes of being able to move forward. We need to keep Charlie's best interest at heart.”
“That's all I have been doing!” I shouted, moving away from her touch. To hear her disregard how much I actually did for our child on a daily basis seriously pissed me off. I was the one that was there day-in and day-out taking care of her. I was the one who ran to her bedside when she had a bad dream. I was a single father, regardless of the fact that I was married to our daughter's absent mother. How completely fucked up was that?
When I was certain I could keep my temper in check, I spoke. “She needs parents, Cassie. Parents…plural. Not one, but two .”
“I couldn't agree more,” Cassie responded with a small shrug. “I want to be there for her.” Her voice cracked as the tears streamed down her cheeks and she wiped them away furiously. “God! What I wouldn't give to sit with her on the couch and read to her…or even just hold her and ask her about her day!”
I rushed toward her, wrapping my hands gently around her biceps. “Then do those things. It's not too late.”
She struggled to free herself, her eyes wild as she moved to the other side of the room. “But it is! I fucked up, Jack!”
With the shake of my head, I furrowed my brow. “Regardless of whether or not you fucked up, you can change your relationship with her. Be there now .”
That was when Cassie shut down. The expression on her face went blank and her shoulders slumped ever-so-slightly. The room was filled with an uncomfortable silence as we stood staring at each other. Cassie's breathing was still shaking with the sobs that were slowly dying. Seconds turned to minutes before her eyes finally locked with mine. Without a word, she quietly moved forward, reaching out to place a hand on my chest.
I pulled away and turned from her, running my hands through my hair as I tried to absorb all that had been said between us. I walked to the mantle and placed my hands on it before slumping forward in defeat.
“I'm so lost, Jack,” Cassie whispered. I could feel her presence right behind me, and it took everything in me not to turn around and embrace her…not to kiss away this whole messed up night. “I don't know where to go from here.” The pain in her voice broke my heart, and my chest tightened as I turned to face her. Her big brown eyes were red and swollen from crying, and she was sniffling against the residual sobs that refused to relent.
“Go?” I asked incredulously. “Cassie, you're not going anywhere.” I cupped her face in my hands and looked into her fear-filled eyes.
She brought her hands up to encircle my wrists. “Jack—” I quickly pressed my lips to hers to silence her. “You really want me to stay?” she mumbled against my mouth before pulling back slightly, her chilled hands circling my wrists.
I shook my head, but not in disagreement. “No, I need you to stay. I can't ever be without you.” I rested my forehead against hers and inhaled deeply, my eyes closing as everything Cassie consumed me. “How can you be so ready to give up on this?”
“Because everything that's
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