Rainfall by Melissa Delport

can find, groping around in the dark – over my head. I slip my feet into my slippers and make my way to the kitchen. I pour myself a glass of water straight from the faucet and stand at the sink, gazing out of the window at the view of the city. I turn the cold water tap back on and wet my fingers, running them over the back of my neck. I feel exhausted. Maybe tomorrow I should ask Doctor Sheldon for some sleeping pills.
    “Paige?”  I turn to find him standing in the doorway, a towel draped around his hips. I catch my breath at the sight of him. He is truly astounding, his perfect sculpted torso and his strong arms are almost painful to look at. “Are you okay?” he asks, yawning widely, showing his perfectly even white teeth.
    “Fine,” I smile weakly and he raises his eyebrow. 
    “What is it?” he asks, taking a few steps forward. I cannot bear to look him in the eye for what I am about to say and I turn quickly back to the window. He moves up behind me and his arms come around me, pulling me back against his warm body. I sigh and drop my head back onto his shoulder. His hand slips under the T-shirt and moves up to cup my breast and I groan. 
    “Adam,” my voice breaks and I start again, “Adam,” I'm relieved that I sound a bit stronger. 
    “Hmm?” he murmurs into my ear, his lips at my neck. I take a deep breath.
    “Adam, I'm going to sleep with him.”
    “What?” He jumps back as though he has just stepped on a rattlesnake. The towel slips and he grabs it, securing it more tightly around his body as he eyes me in disbelief.
    “What are you talking about?” 
    “Kyle,” I answer, nodding my head, “I'm going to sleep with Kyle.”
    I expect his bellow of refusal and I let him rage on. I don’t blame him but I have given this a lot of thought and my mind is made up.
    “Are you insane?” he asks, the muscle in his jaw twitching.
    “Adam,” I turn to face him and place my hands on either side of his face. “Kyle is very sexual.”  I ignore his grimace of disgust. “He is going to have sex; with or without us.  It’s just who he is.  Unfortunately.” I take a deep breath, barely able to believe what I am saying myself.  I frown, hating that I am the cause of the anguish that is so visible on his beautiful face.
    “I love you,” I say and he barely seems to notice. I try again. “I love you, Adam Parker.  More than I ever thought possible.” Tears well in my eyes and he takes hold of my shoulders, his fingers biting into me. I can feel the depth of his despair and it breaks my heart but it gives me the strength I need to go on. “I will not let him use your body, Adam. It belongs to you.” He shakes his head. 
    “No, it belongs to you,” he corrects, breathing out slowly, trying not to give in to his obvious emotions and I smile encouragingly.
    “Even better. It belongs to me. So I'm the only person that will be having sex with this body.”  He grimaces again and I pull him down onto the couch, sitting down beside him.
    “Think about it, Adam. What if he goes off and gets you infected with some disease?  Kyle hardly strikes me as the selective type. And what if he goes off and gets some stranger pregnant? I can’t be with him all the time.  If he goes off on some booty call he'll leave me behind. We have no idea the trouble he could get you into. We cannot risk your life like that.”
    “But I don’t want you having sex with him.” Adam sounds as forlorn as a child and I put my arms around him, drawing his face toward me until our noses are touching.
    “I know you don’t. But I don’t want you having sex with anyone else,” I murmur and he shuts his eyes. He cannot argue with my logic. As awful as it is, it boils down to this: Either I have sex with Kyle in Adam’s body or Adam’s body will be having sex with a bunch of strangers.  There is no contest, we have no other choice. Adam knows this, I know this. The question remains to be seen whether we can