Purple Golf Cart: The Misadventures of a Lesbian Grandma by Ronni Sanlo Page B

made John Wayne look like a drag queen. I watched Cheri saunter into the Parliament that night, moving slowing, deliberately, with a group of women behind her. Without even looking—I swear!—Cheri tossed a giant wad of keys over her shoulder. They landed on a table that was already occupied by several women. Without hesitation, the women deferred to Cheri and vacated the table. That’s how she worked. She was tough, she owned the place, and everyone knew it. Yet she had a heart that was huge and open. Years later I helped her get a job in the AIDS Surveillance office with the Florida Health Department in Orlando. Cheri Goyette died a few of years ago but her swagger lives on, in my memory and now in my writing.
     
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    I had no money because I had no job. I kept getting fired for being a lesbian. Therefore, I had no transportation. When Jake and I separated, I got our old orange MG Midget which was already on its last wheel. I traded it for a little blue Datsun pickup truck. I had an orange stripe and University of Florida insignia painted on either side. But lack of employment and funds forced me to trade my truck for a beat-up old car that didn’t work very well. Then no car. Jake’s father occasionally loaned his old car to me on the days I had the children, which I’m sure chapped Cynda’s ass.
     
    I needed reliable, regular transportation so I bought a motorcycle, a light blue Kawasaki 250. I hated it from the day I got it but it was all I could afford, and didn’t “dykes ride bikes” anyway? I remember one day when I was trying to impress a potential girlfriend, I was at a dead stop in her driveway. The engine wasn’t even on. I will never understand how I fell over sideways. I felt like Arte Johnson, the little guy who always fell over sideways on his tricycle on the Rowan and Martin’s Laugh In television show in the late 1960s. I was so happy to get rid of that thing. I just wasn’t that kind of dyke!
     
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    Researcher Vivienne Cass created a model of sexual identity development in 1979. She theorized that there are six stages through which each lesbian or gay person must go before they are fully synergistically integrated into their sexual orientation. Stage One happens when one realizes she or he is different but unwilling to deal with it. For twenty years I was in the Cass Stage One in which I remained silent, closeted, unwilling to acknowledge my sexual orientation to anyone. Stage Two occurred when I accidentally found relevant information at the Sisterhood Bookstore. I realized I wasn’t the only one and finally told another person about myself. Stage Three was about becoming comfortable in my identity as a lesbian. Stage Four happened when I found the lesbians of Orlando and became part of a community. Stage Five is leadership, and Stage Six is full integration of my sexual orientation with all my other identities—as a woman, a Jewish person, a white person. That had not happened yet back then, but I was on my way.
     
     
     
     
    14. Finding Voice
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    1982
    U.S. President : Ronald Reagan
    Best film : Gandhi; Tootsie, E. T. Extra-Terrestrial, The Verdict
    Best actors : Ben Kingsley, Meryl Streep
    Best TV shows : Late Night with David Letterman; Cagney & Lacey; The $25,000 Pyramid; Family Ties; Silver Spoons; Cheers; St. Elsewhere; Newhart
    Best songs : Eye of the Tiger, I Love Rock N Roll, Truly, Up Where We Belong, Chariots of Fire, The Girl is Mine, Hold Me
    Civics : Equal Rights Amendment fails ratification; John Hinckley Jr. found not guilty in shooting of President Reagan by reason of insanity: MRI machines introduced;
    Popular Culture : Michael Jackson releases Thriller; Cats opens on Broadway; permanent artificial heart is implanted in a human; Schindler’s List by Thomas Keneally and The Color Purple by Alice Walker published; Parents & Friends of Lesbians & Gays (PFLAG) founded; Wisconsin first