being fair. Jean gathered up the strips of paper and mushed them into a tiny ball between her fingers.
So . . .
Natalie seemed an obvious person to start with, because she was such a dearâno, thought Jean, that was thinking emotionally. Was there any practical reason to consider? HandinessâNatalie lived four blocks awayâwas all she could think of. No less significant a consideration could there possibly be. But it was also no reason to rule her out. So, for the present: Natalie was an option . . .
Louise was arguably just as handy as Natalie; five blocks east or four blocks north, it hardly made any difference. But Jean could see a very obvious reason not to do Louise first. It was the whole matter of her affair with Milt. People who knew about the goings-on between those twoâshe imagined there were certainly a few still working at Hern Regional High Schoolâwould be asked if they knew of anyone with a motive to harm Louise. Harm would be how they would think of it. And Jeanâs name was sure to come up. It would be difficult, she thought, to convince suspicious people that she hadnât even really thought about the affair in years, even though the very fact that Louise was her good friend should have been evidence itself. And if the police started nosing around (she couldnât assume favors just because she was the chiefâs sister; that wouldnât be fair to Andrew Jr.), there was a chance she wouldnât be able to finish what sheâd started. So, under the circumstances: Louise might have to be last.
The fact that Adele lived in the city was a mark both for and against her, Jean thought. For her, in that the element of distance would obscure any connection between the two of them. Against her, in that it was such a bother to have to drive into the city and deal with all that terrible traffic. Honestly, it was a full-day ordeal. And Adele was always so busy, it was hard to fit into her schedule. Sitting at the picnic table, Jean rolled the ball of names between her fingers and thought, well, inconvenience was hardly a good enough reason to exclude Adele from consideration. So: Adele, an option . . .
Now Dorothy, thought Jean. Dorothy . . . Living out along one of the rural concessions, not right in town, not too far a drive. Working hard to take care of Roy; now there was a bad situation that was only going to get worse. Oh, she put on a brave, no-nonsense face, but Jean could tell from Dorothyâs eyes that she was starting to despair. âBig Boyâ was close to three hundred pounds now. He could still dress and feed himself, but for how long? And when he got angry he was like one of those movie monsters tearing up everything in his path, except there was so little left now because their money was running out and heâd already smashed or torn or kicked so many of their nicest things. Poor Dorothy deserved to be rescued from all of that. She deserved to be treated to a special, joyful, passionate experience, and then freed . . . All things considered: Dorothy was a definite possibility.
Last, Jean put her mind to Cheryl Nunley. She thought that if she could choose someone for purely emotional reasons, it would have to be Cheryl. Because there was so much Jean felt a need to make up for. The abandonment of her friend at the darkest moments of her life. The subsequent decades of neglect. The hateful lack of curiosity about what had become of someone with whom she had shared so much formative teenage experience. It was as if she had worn Cheryl like a favorite pair of shoes and then kicked her to the back of the closet.
And yet, it was hard to imagine Cheryl being an option in the immediate future because Jean had no idea where she lived, and there was no telling how long it would take Welland to find her. The possibility existed that she wasnât even alive, which was just awful to think about. So Jean had to accept the facts: Cheryl was on the back burner . .
So . . .
Natalie seemed an obvious person to start with, because she was such a dearâno, thought Jean, that was thinking emotionally. Was there any practical reason to consider? HandinessâNatalie lived four blocks awayâwas all she could think of. No less significant a consideration could there possibly be. But it was also no reason to rule her out. So, for the present: Natalie was an option . . .
Louise was arguably just as handy as Natalie; five blocks east or four blocks north, it hardly made any difference. But Jean could see a very obvious reason not to do Louise first. It was the whole matter of her affair with Milt. People who knew about the goings-on between those twoâshe imagined there were certainly a few still working at Hern Regional High Schoolâwould be asked if they knew of anyone with a motive to harm Louise. Harm would be how they would think of it. And Jeanâs name was sure to come up. It would be difficult, she thought, to convince suspicious people that she hadnât even really thought about the affair in years, even though the very fact that Louise was her good friend should have been evidence itself. And if the police started nosing around (she couldnât assume favors just because she was the chiefâs sister; that wouldnât be fair to Andrew Jr.), there was a chance she wouldnât be able to finish what sheâd started. So, under the circumstances: Louise might have to be last.
The fact that Adele lived in the city was a mark both for and against her, Jean thought. For her, in that the element of distance would obscure any connection between the two of them. Against her, in that it was such a bother to have to drive into the city and deal with all that terrible traffic. Honestly, it was a full-day ordeal. And Adele was always so busy, it was hard to fit into her schedule. Sitting at the picnic table, Jean rolled the ball of names between her fingers and thought, well, inconvenience was hardly a good enough reason to exclude Adele from consideration. So: Adele, an option . . .
Now Dorothy, thought Jean. Dorothy . . . Living out along one of the rural concessions, not right in town, not too far a drive. Working hard to take care of Roy; now there was a bad situation that was only going to get worse. Oh, she put on a brave, no-nonsense face, but Jean could tell from Dorothyâs eyes that she was starting to despair. âBig Boyâ was close to three hundred pounds now. He could still dress and feed himself, but for how long? And when he got angry he was like one of those movie monsters tearing up everything in his path, except there was so little left now because their money was running out and heâd already smashed or torn or kicked so many of their nicest things. Poor Dorothy deserved to be rescued from all of that. She deserved to be treated to a special, joyful, passionate experience, and then freed . . . All things considered: Dorothy was a definite possibility.
Last, Jean put her mind to Cheryl Nunley. She thought that if she could choose someone for purely emotional reasons, it would have to be Cheryl. Because there was so much Jean felt a need to make up for. The abandonment of her friend at the darkest moments of her life. The subsequent decades of neglect. The hateful lack of curiosity about what had become of someone with whom she had shared so much formative teenage experience. It was as if she had worn Cheryl like a favorite pair of shoes and then kicked her to the back of the closet.
And yet, it was hard to imagine Cheryl being an option in the immediate future because Jean had no idea where she lived, and there was no telling how long it would take Welland to find her. The possibility existed that she wasnât even alive, which was just awful to think about. So Jean had to accept the facts: Cheryl was on the back burner . .
Similar Books
