Chapter One
Denny is yelling, but I canât hear his words. Onstage, Twisted Hazard has just ripped their last chord. Itâs still bouncing around the gym.
âWhat?â I yell back. I pull the tissue out of my ears. I always take tissue to Battle of the Bands.
â I got a great idea ,â Denny yells.
Denny gets lots of ideas. His last one called for coconuts, shaving cream and our math teacherâs car. If this is a great idea, itâll be the first time heâs ever had one.
âWhat is it?â I say.
Denny says, âWe hafta start a band.â
âWhat for?â
âWhat for ?â Denny waves at the stage. The Hazard bass player is a hobbit in red plaid pajama pants. Heâs talking to two girls in amazingly tight jeans. The lead singer looks too young to stay out after the streetlights come on, plus heâs in chess club. Three girls, one very hot, are chatting with him. The drummer has glasses and is wearing flood pants. Heâs handing his snare and a cymbal to two girls in grade ten . One of them is his sister, but still.
âLook at those guys,â Denny says. âImagine how weâd do.â
I hate to admit it, but maybe Denny has a point. Those guys are in grade nine, and weâre in grade nine. They are nerds, and yet those girls are all over them.
Weâre not nerdsâeven if Dennyâs ears do stick outâbut weâre invisible to girls. There are girls all around us, in cool shapes and sizes and smells. They donât help us with anything, except maybe give us something to stare at.
Maybe a band is the answer. I bet playing in a band is easier than playing basketball, especially for someone my size. Thereâs a problem though.
âUh, Den,â I say, âdonât you have to play music to be in a band?â
Up onstage, the next group is plugging in. Itâs No Money Down. The guitar players are in my English class.
âWell, duh ,â Denny says. Heâs patting his pockets. He pulls out his cell and flips it open. âNo problem. Youâve got that stuff at your house.â
There is a bass and a guitar at my place. I fool around on them a little.
Denny says, âAnd I play guitar and sing.â
Denny did take some guitar lessons a couple of years back.
âSince when do you sing?â I ask. In between ideas, Denny has been known to lie.
âMe?â he says. âI sing great. I was in that choir, remember?â
I make a face and say, âSo was I, Den. That was grade four.â
Denny says, âYeah, well, I sing all the time at home. While Iâm playing guitar. I just donât do it around other people. Anyway, itâs your band style that counts.â
âBand style?â I say.
Denny says, âYeah. You know, your look, your attitude. That stuff. Like, notice how cool bands never smile in pictures? Anyway, most of them donât even play, they fake along to their records.â
âHow do you know?â I ask.
Denny shrugs. âEverybody knows that.â
âOne problem, Den,â I say, âwe wonât have any records to fake to.â
Denny is too busy texting to answer.
How did we end up talking about starting a band? Really, we only came to see who was around. And to look at girls and make jokes about them we donât really mean. Soon weâll probably yell and fake wrestle with some other guys. Later weâll walk back to my place to watch downloads of Python Pit 6 and Facemelt and laugh at them. I mean, you have to do something on a Friday night.
Up onstage, some goof from the student government introduces No Money Down. One of the guitar players hits a power chord behind him. Everybody is crowding the stage around them. Girls are crowding the stage around them.
I look at the two guys from English. They look the same as they do in English, only they donât. They have sweet guitars that I donât know the make of. Lights are
Fuyumi Ono
Tailley (MC 6)
Robert Graysmith
Rich Restucci
Chris Fox
James Sallis
John Harris
Robin Jones Gunn
Linda Lael Miller
Nancy Springer