in the world without us cluttering up the planet even more with all of these unwanted kids."
Todd said nothing. He just stared at her, trying to read her, trying to figure her out.
Why the hell did she just tell me all of that?
She winked at him and shrugged her shoulders. "Just an FYI."
Todd turned and walked out of her office.
Chapter Seventeen
Todd had walked to work. After the night he'd had, he'd needed to clear his head. Walking gave him an opportunity to think and clear his head. As Todd walked out of the Department of Welfare, he was thinking about Stephanie and his child. Leaving the baby alive made him feel like a hypocrite. How could he take Nicolene's baby for the good of the planet but make his own child some sort of exception? It wasn't right. But how could he abort his own child?
This was all Stephanie's fault. He'd never wanted children. She'd known that all along but yet she'd allowed herself to get pregnant anyway. He could have used a condom of course but she'd said that she was on the pill. He had trusted her and she'd betrayed him. She was every bit as guilty as Nicolene. But there was no way he could cut her open the way he'd done that crackwhore. He loved her. Besides, Cathy would have broken both of his legs and shot his testicles off before he could have gotten close to Stephanie.
Unless I can get to Cathy first. If I can surprise her and hit her with the stun gun I should be able to handcuff and gag her before she can shoot me or kick my ass or something. If I can do it quietly I should be able to get Stephanie before she can run. Or maybe I can get Stephanie while Cathy is out chasing bail jumpers?
Todd considered how much energy he was putting into planning something he had told himself he wouldn't do. He reached into his messenger bag and grabbed the scalpel. He slid his thumb over the blade and drew blood. The pain helped him to organize his thoughts.
She has to die.
It was simple and direct. He couldn't murder their child and look Stephanie in the face ever again. It would be easier if both child and mom were gone.
And Cathy too.
If he didn't kill her she'd hunt him to the ends of the earth.
Todd walked to the hardware store around the corner.
"Still heading up to Mammoth Mountain? I heard there might be rain up there."
"What?"
"You bought an axe the other day for your camping trip at Mammoth Mountain. I thought you might of put it off."
"I'm still going. I need to pick up a few more things."
Todd picked up another four pack of duct tape and threw it into his shopping basket. As an afterthought, he grabbed a claw hammer and threw that in as well.
"Doing repairs on the cabin," Todd offered before the old store clerk could comment. He paid quickly and left.
Todd made one more stop on the way home. He went into the medical supply store and bought a pack of disposable scalpels. He walked home slowly and changed his mind several times before he reached his apartment. Each time he began to doubt his course he ran his thumb along the scalpel blade and remembered the baby he'd strangled with the umbilical cord in the name of the environment. That memory kept him on course. If he didn't get rid of Stephanie's baby then his entire mission was a lie and he was little more than a murderer. He went upstairs to his apartment and got his bike. He needed to do it before he lost his nerve and changed his mind.
He pedaled hard, dodging between cars and hopping curbs as if he was being chased. He thought about Heimlich's plan to put Progesterex into the drinking water of the 25 most populated cities in the world. It was so much better than what he was doing. What he was doing would barely change anything. He had saved perhaps a couple hundred animals and maybe as many trees and plants. Nothing in the grand scheme of things. He could only hope that he would become a symbol of some sort, like Heimlich, an example for others to follow.
Todd arrived in Stephanie's neighborhood, sweaty and
Todd said nothing. He just stared at her, trying to read her, trying to figure her out.
Why the hell did she just tell me all of that?
She winked at him and shrugged her shoulders. "Just an FYI."
Todd turned and walked out of her office.
Chapter Seventeen
Todd had walked to work. After the night he'd had, he'd needed to clear his head. Walking gave him an opportunity to think and clear his head. As Todd walked out of the Department of Welfare, he was thinking about Stephanie and his child. Leaving the baby alive made him feel like a hypocrite. How could he take Nicolene's baby for the good of the planet but make his own child some sort of exception? It wasn't right. But how could he abort his own child?
This was all Stephanie's fault. He'd never wanted children. She'd known that all along but yet she'd allowed herself to get pregnant anyway. He could have used a condom of course but she'd said that she was on the pill. He had trusted her and she'd betrayed him. She was every bit as guilty as Nicolene. But there was no way he could cut her open the way he'd done that crackwhore. He loved her. Besides, Cathy would have broken both of his legs and shot his testicles off before he could have gotten close to Stephanie.
Unless I can get to Cathy first. If I can surprise her and hit her with the stun gun I should be able to handcuff and gag her before she can shoot me or kick my ass or something. If I can do it quietly I should be able to get Stephanie before she can run. Or maybe I can get Stephanie while Cathy is out chasing bail jumpers?
Todd considered how much energy he was putting into planning something he had told himself he wouldn't do. He reached into his messenger bag and grabbed the scalpel. He slid his thumb over the blade and drew blood. The pain helped him to organize his thoughts.
She has to die.
It was simple and direct. He couldn't murder their child and look Stephanie in the face ever again. It would be easier if both child and mom were gone.
And Cathy too.
If he didn't kill her she'd hunt him to the ends of the earth.
Todd walked to the hardware store around the corner.
"Still heading up to Mammoth Mountain? I heard there might be rain up there."
"What?"
"You bought an axe the other day for your camping trip at Mammoth Mountain. I thought you might of put it off."
"I'm still going. I need to pick up a few more things."
Todd picked up another four pack of duct tape and threw it into his shopping basket. As an afterthought, he grabbed a claw hammer and threw that in as well.
"Doing repairs on the cabin," Todd offered before the old store clerk could comment. He paid quickly and left.
Todd made one more stop on the way home. He went into the medical supply store and bought a pack of disposable scalpels. He walked home slowly and changed his mind several times before he reached his apartment. Each time he began to doubt his course he ran his thumb along the scalpel blade and remembered the baby he'd strangled with the umbilical cord in the name of the environment. That memory kept him on course. If he didn't get rid of Stephanie's baby then his entire mission was a lie and he was little more than a murderer. He went upstairs to his apartment and got his bike. He needed to do it before he lost his nerve and changed his mind.
He pedaled hard, dodging between cars and hopping curbs as if he was being chased. He thought about Heimlich's plan to put Progesterex into the drinking water of the 25 most populated cities in the world. It was so much better than what he was doing. What he was doing would barely change anything. He had saved perhaps a couple hundred animals and maybe as many trees and plants. Nothing in the grand scheme of things. He could only hope that he would become a symbol of some sort, like Heimlich, an example for others to follow.
Todd arrived in Stephanie's neighborhood, sweaty and
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