Playing With You by Cheyenne McCray

“Eventually they all screw you over.” She waved her hand as if waving away the notion of even considering a man to be a good guy. “I’m through with them.”
    Ricki couldn’t think of anything to say. She held a lot of grudges against her ex, but she’d had to let go of the anger or she knew it would weigh her down even more than her depression already did. She had to believe in the goodness in people and not let it color her world in dark shades.
    “It’s been a little rough since I divorced him.” Deena sighed. “I’ve had two close friends exit my life. After the last one, I had to get out of town. I just couldn’t take being in Tucson after she was gone.”
    “It sounds like you’ve been through a lot.” Ricki studied Deena who looked away for a long moment. “You said you had two friends leave your life. What happened to them if you don’t mind me asking?”
    Deena gripped her large margarita glass. It was her fourth. When she spoke again her words were slurred a bit from having had too much alcohol. “My friend, Celia, just up and disappeared one day. Apparently she ran off and no one has seen her since.”
    Ricki shook her head. “That must have been terrible to have someone you care about vanish.”
    Deena nodded, her eyes going a little unfocused. “As far as Maria…she was murdered.”
    A hard weight dropped in Ricki’s belly and her eyes widened. She reached out and put her hand over Deena’s on the tabletop. “That’s horrible.”
    Deena’s shoulders slumped as she let out a sigh. “They were both my roommates. First Celia, and then several months after she disappeared, Maria moved in with me.” Deena’s eyes glittered with tears. “After she was killed, I decided I’m not meant to have a roommate.”
    “I’m so sorry, Deena.” Ricki’s throat felt tight as she squeezed Deena’s hand.
    Deena looked grateful and interlaced her fingers with Ricki’s as she stared into Ricki’s eyes. “I miss them.”
    Despite the level of tipsiness, thanks to her two margaritas, Ricki had the most bizarre sensations go through her as Deena held her hand with their fingers locked together. Ricki straightened in her chair and slipped her fingers from Deena’s.
    “If only they—” Deena stopped herself and folded both hands on the tabletop. When she looked at Ricki again, her expression was regretful, like she’d said too much.
    “If only they what?” Ricki prompted.
    Deena shook her head. “Enough about things we can’t change.” She picked up her margarita glass and drained it. When she set her glass down it thumped hard on the wooden surface of the table. “I’ve done most of the talking. Why don’t you tell me more about you? Boyfriends, girlfriends, lovers, friends. Everything.”
    Ricki didn’t know if it was the margaritas she’d had, or Deena’s directness, but she felt heat flush beneath her skin. Ricki didn’t think she could be as open about everything as Deena had been. Not to mention she hadn’t had a lot of lovers. As a matter of fact she’d just had the one man she’d ever gone to bed with, her ex-husband, and that had proven to be one big crappy experience.
    When Ricki hesitated, Deena folded her arms on the tabletop and said, “What about women?”
    Ricki frowned. “In regards to what?”
    Deena leaned closer. “Since men totally suck, have you ever thought about being with a woman instead of a man?”
    Ricki felt even warmer than she had earlier and her head swam a little. Deena had obviously had far too much to drink. As a matter of fact, Ricki was pretty sure she herself was beyond her alcohol threshold with two large margaritas.
    “Well?” Deena looked at Ricki expectantly.
    “Not really,” Ricki said hesitantly.
    “Ah-ha.” Deena grinned. “You didn’t flat out say no. So tell me, have you ever been with a woman?”
    Ricki’s cheeks flushed and she couldn’t believe she was telling Deena what had happened in college. “I got drunk once and