Playing to Win by Avery Cockburn Page B

bedcovers in his fists, Andrew gasped out the words Colin’s cock was forcing from him. “I had to. I’m not sorry.”
    “And no one gave you what you deserved. Not until just now.”
    Andrew hung his head, shutting his eyes against the truth.
    “No. You’ll watch us.” Colin pulled him up and seized his chin again, this time prying open Andrew’s mouth with his fingers. Then he twisted his grip to make him look at the mirror. “See the wee monster you are. See me fucking you, ya wee monster.”
    As Andrew stared at the brutal reflection, at his helpless, nearly naked body arched against Colin’s black shirt, at the way Colin’s rage jutted his jaw and curled his lips, he felt something deep in his soul take flight.
    Andrew’s vision blurred with tears of terror and joy. This is what surrender feels like.
    His lips closed on Colin’s fingers. He sucked and tongued, feeling Colin grow even harder until he was a steel rod, reaching up, tearing Andrew apart, body and soul.
    “Does this make it okay?” Colin wrapped both arms around Andrew’s torso and lifted him off the bench. “You let me do this to you and we’re even now? It makes us equal?” Colin’s voice pulsed with pain. “We’ll never be equals, your sort and mine, not outside this room. You’ll see to it, won’t you?”
    Helpless in Colin’s grasp, Andrew couldn’t answer. Pressure built inside as the silk of his jock brief shifted against his cock, as Colin filled him from behind, using him, abusing him, taking every tight, wet inch he needed.
    “Answer me.” Colin pounded harder, jackhammering now. “Answer me!”
    “I can’t, I’m coming!” Andrew felt the surge fill his underwear, coating him with warmth and wetness.
    “Fuck. God, I can feel it. Fuck!” Colin’s arms went viper-tight around him, cutting off Andrew’s breath and sending his delirium higher and higher until it seemed his eyes would burst. This is what it’s like to die of pleasure. Oh yes, bring it on.
    Groaning, Colin ground into him, hips rolling and pitching. In the mirror, Andrew watched their bodies jerk and spasm as one.
    With shuddering breath, Colin finally loosened his grip enough to set Andrew down on the bench. Andrew gulped the air that had been denied him, his head swimming and limbs buzzing. He expected to be shoved away now, discarded with disgust.
    But Colin stayed, holding him, forehead pressed to the back of his shoulder even as he slowly withdrew from Andrew’s body. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered. “I shouldn’t have said those things.”
    “No worries,” Andrew said, trying to convince himself as much as Colin. “All part of the game.”
    “It wasn’t.” Colin’s voice quaked. “It was more than that.”
    “Even so.” Andrew wiped his eyes, then shifted away, turning to sit on the foot of the bed. “Considering our history and our—well, our differences—you and I were destined for a hate fuck sooner or later.” He drew his toes up the outside of Colin’s thigh. “At least now it’s out of the way.”
    Colin stared at him, face mottled with exertion and emotion. “You don’t want me to leave?”
    Leave? What was wrong with this lad that he expected rejection at every turn?
    Andrew steeled his face to keep the wave of sympathy from reaching his eyes. “The night’s young yet.” He jerked his chin the way he did when he expected to be obeyed. “Now take off your clothes and come to bed.”

C HAPTER T EN

    A NDREW LAY ALONE under the cool white sheet, his head on one of the lush down pillows. It was impossible to chase his racing thoughts, distorted as they were with the lingering haze of pleasure.
    He’d never felt so raw. Not so much physically—though his knees would surely have scrapes and bruises (that bench wasn’t as soft as it appeared). It wasn’t the brutal way Colin had touched him that stripped him bare. It was the truth of his words.
    From his earliest days at Fettes Prep, Andrew had watched older