this … going steady as you call it , is a mistake ? I —it will change our relationship —at work . It might get in the wa y of what you asked me to do, that writer’s workshop, for instance— our professional relationship .”
Why had he talked about work when what he wanted to concentrate on was her, them, their relationship? “You’re thin king too much.” H e dismissed her concern, not wanting to acknowledge it , wanting to get back to what his body was demanding .
Amanda was sil e nt. When she turned toward him again , he riv e t e d his gaze on h e r fac e , daring h e r to look a way.
He kept his voice low , his desire obvious even as he challenged her. “You’r e not a virgin, Amanda. You know what making lov e is all about.” His hands caressed her face , encouraging her , too aware of how tight his pants felt. Could she tell?
Sh e nodd e d . “That’s why w e have to slow down . I hav e to b e absolut e ly sure it’s what I want, that it’s right .”
“And with th e right p e rson ?” Make it me. I could be that person —if you’ll let me .
Sh e nodd e d . “That, too.” One hand traced a finger from his chin down to the middle of his chest.
Would she move her hand lower? He held himself in check when what he wanted was to grab her and hold her tight. “Don’t you trust me? ” I’m trustworthy. Touch me. Try me. “ A r e you afraid of g e tting pr e gnant again ?”
The corners of her mouth curved upward with the hint of a smile, but she remained silent for a long beat . “With my history, you’d think that.” Her hands deserted him and smoothed her blouse over her beautiful breasts . “No. I ’m protected. I —”
“I won’t tak e advantag e of you, Amanda. I wouldn’t do that .”
“ That isn’t it. I’m just not r e ady in my head—in my heart . N ot y e t .”
Not yet? Then she i sn’t ruling out the possibility? “ Mayb e lat e r?” How long do we hav e to wait —for the rest of you to say yes ? Especially your heart . I need to know that, too .
“Mayb e . And t here’s something else .”
“What’ s that?” He loved how she looked at him, her head slightly cocked to one side, the way her eyes shone back at him . What was she thinking when she suddenly smiled?
“ If I’m going to sl ee p with som e on e , I’d pr e f e r a comfortabl e b e d rath e r than th e backs e at of a car . ”
He nodded, relieved. “Und e rstood.” Was she thinking of his big four-poster? I can take care of that. H e grinn e d back at h e r , letting one hand cover hers, the one that had been moving nervously in her lap . “ You hav e n’t answ e r e d my qu e stion.”
“Which on e ?”
“Does this mean you will —or won’t— go st e ady with m e ?” He willed his pulse to stop racing.
“That s ee ms such an arcan e conc e pt.” Her hand stopped moving, and slowly grasped his.
“Spok e n lik e an E nglish major—answ e r th e qu e stion.” He watched as she tucked her b l ou se back into the waistband of her skirt .
“Y e s.” Her voice was quiet as Amanda slid away from him and sat primly in th e pass e ng e r s e at , only her hands betraying her tension .
What is she thinking?
“Marcus , will you pl e as e tak e m e hom e ?”
He narrowed his eyes at the change in tone of her voice . “Ar e you mad at m e ?” h e ask e d , turning th e k e y to start th e e ngin e .
“No. ” She took a deep breath before answering , her voice barely above a whisper . “ I don’t trust mys e lf.”
He stopped the car with a jerk. “You don’t n ee d to trust yours e lf. Trust m e ! ” He started to r e ach for h e r again , certain sh e had chang e d h e r mind.
But her hands came up between them and she shook her head . “No t tonight . ”
When they got back to her house, he walked her to her door. “Amanda, I can wait as long as it takes for you to feel right about this.”
Her eyes held his gaze for a long moment before she looked
Why had he talked about work when what he wanted to concentrate on was her, them, their relationship? “You’re thin king too much.” H e dismissed her concern, not wanting to acknowledge it , wanting to get back to what his body was demanding .
Amanda was sil e nt. When she turned toward him again , he riv e t e d his gaze on h e r fac e , daring h e r to look a way.
He kept his voice low , his desire obvious even as he challenged her. “You’r e not a virgin, Amanda. You know what making lov e is all about.” His hands caressed her face , encouraging her , too aware of how tight his pants felt. Could she tell?
Sh e nodd e d . “That’s why w e have to slow down . I hav e to b e absolut e ly sure it’s what I want, that it’s right .”
“And with th e right p e rson ?” Make it me. I could be that person —if you’ll let me .
Sh e nodd e d . “That, too.” One hand traced a finger from his chin down to the middle of his chest.
Would she move her hand lower? He held himself in check when what he wanted was to grab her and hold her tight. “Don’t you trust me? ” I’m trustworthy. Touch me. Try me. “ A r e you afraid of g e tting pr e gnant again ?”
The corners of her mouth curved upward with the hint of a smile, but she remained silent for a long beat . “With my history, you’d think that.” Her hands deserted him and smoothed her blouse over her beautiful breasts . “No. I ’m protected. I —”
“I won’t tak e advantag e of you, Amanda. I wouldn’t do that .”
“ That isn’t it. I’m just not r e ady in my head—in my heart . N ot y e t .”
Not yet? Then she i sn’t ruling out the possibility? “ Mayb e lat e r?” How long do we hav e to wait —for the rest of you to say yes ? Especially your heart . I need to know that, too .
“Mayb e . And t here’s something else .”
“What’ s that?” He loved how she looked at him, her head slightly cocked to one side, the way her eyes shone back at him . What was she thinking when she suddenly smiled?
“ If I’m going to sl ee p with som e on e , I’d pr e f e r a comfortabl e b e d rath e r than th e backs e at of a car . ”
He nodded, relieved. “Und e rstood.” Was she thinking of his big four-poster? I can take care of that. H e grinn e d back at h e r , letting one hand cover hers, the one that had been moving nervously in her lap . “ You hav e n’t answ e r e d my qu e stion.”
“Which on e ?”
“Does this mean you will —or won’t— go st e ady with m e ?” He willed his pulse to stop racing.
“That s ee ms such an arcan e conc e pt.” Her hand stopped moving, and slowly grasped his.
“Spok e n lik e an E nglish major—answ e r th e qu e stion.” He watched as she tucked her b l ou se back into the waistband of her skirt .
“Y e s.” Her voice was quiet as Amanda slid away from him and sat primly in th e pass e ng e r s e at , only her hands betraying her tension .
What is she thinking?
“Marcus , will you pl e as e tak e m e hom e ?”
He narrowed his eyes at the change in tone of her voice . “Ar e you mad at m e ?” h e ask e d , turning th e k e y to start th e e ngin e .
“No. ” She took a deep breath before answering , her voice barely above a whisper . “ I don’t trust mys e lf.”
He stopped the car with a jerk. “You don’t n ee d to trust yours e lf. Trust m e ! ” He started to r e ach for h e r again , certain sh e had chang e d h e r mind.
But her hands came up between them and she shook her head . “No t tonight . ”
When they got back to her house, he walked her to her door. “Amanda, I can wait as long as it takes for you to feel right about this.”
Her eyes held his gaze for a long moment before she looked
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