Nowhere to Run by Valerie Hansen

was a mess, partly thanks to the effects of having been out in the wind and rain, and the skin below her eyes was darker than usual, leaving no doubt that she was sleep-deprived.
    Hoping it would help, she splashed warm water on her face. Patty came into the bathroom as she was toweling it dry.
    â€œWhat’s the matter, mama?”
    â€œNothing, honey. I’m just trying to wake up. How are you this morning?”
    â€œFine.” She brightened. “Can we go see Babe?”
    â€œMaybe later,” Marie said wearily.
    â€œHow about church school? Are we going there? You said—”
    â€œI know what I said,” Marie answered. “Just be patient, will you. I’m so tired I can hardly think straight.” She leaned closer to the mirror and blinked at her image. “I’ll feel better if I shower and wash my hair. You go get dressed and watch cartoons for a while, okay? Just don’t turn the TV up too loud. We don’t want to disturb the guests in the rooms next door.”
    Seeing the child’s mood plummet, Marie felt more than a twinge of guilt. She was trying to be a good mother, but her senses were on overload owing to continuous tension, not to mention the negative effect prolonged sleeplessness was having on her body and brain.
    Someday she’d make all this up to Patty, she vowed, stepping beneath the soothing spray of the shower and letting it knead the tension out of her shoulders and neck.
    She closed her eyes, turned and let the water wash away her tears of frustration and apprehension. Would this nightmare ever end? Would she survive to keep her promises to Patty? To God?
    Lifting her face to the spray, she sent up a silent, wordless prayer, asking for the only thing she could think of that might help: superhuman stamina.
    It wasn’t fair. She’d mended her ways, had become a Christian and was living the most honorable life she knew how. So why was everything going so terribly wrong? Why, instead of getting better, did her life seem to have taken a turn for the worse?
    She remembered what her pastor had told her when she’d gone to him for counseling after leaving the shelter. Being a Christian didn’t mean that there would be no more trials, nor did coming to the Lord negate her past mistakes. Yes, she was forgiven. And, yes, she could start over. What she couldn’t expect to do was avoid the consequences of her former sins, any more than Roy could have turned over a new leaf and had his prior crimes erased without having had to face punishment.
    Put in those terms, Marie could understand the spiritual concept, but that didn’t mean she liked it.
    When Marie finally finished her shower, she could hear the television playing in the other room. Patty was such a good girl. Always obedient. Even if she did sometimes argue, she never actually balked. What a joy it was to be the mother of a sweet child like that.
    Humming, Marie slipped her robe on and stood in front of the mirror to blow-dry her hair. The shower had helped. A lot. So would getting out of that tiny rented room and at least going for a walk. Too bad they had to be so cautious, yet she might even consider taking Patty to the park she’d seen just down the road and letting her play there, providing the ground wasn’t all muddy after last night’s storm. The poor little girl had been cooped up a lot more than usual since they’d left home, and she had to be getting antsy.
    â€œI’ll make it up to her soon,” Marie vowed. Smiling, she opened the bathroom door as she said, “That’s a little loud, honey. I told you to keep it quieter, remember?”
    No one answered.
    Marie glanced at the bed, fully expecting to see Patty lounging there on her tummy, chin in her hands and feet in the air, watching her favorite cartoon show.
    â€œPatty?” The air suddenly seemed to drain from the room. “Patty? Don’t hide from Mama, okay? It’s not