Nobody Loves a Bigfoot Like a Bigfoot Babe by Simon Okill
Authors: Simon Okill
Tags: bigfoot
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the same thing. When he did show up he claimed he'd been abducted by Bigfoot." She told them this knowing full well the agents already knew as much as she did. It was something to say to get her mind off Willis.
"Yeah, we know," Merlot agreed. "Kids!"
"Yeah, kids!" Lou sighed. She glanced at the heartless bastard. She remembered the time he and Duane had pulled the same prank, claiming that a harem of Bigfoot babes had abducted them and had forced them to do certain things of a sexual nature. Willis could have fun back then, but what about now? Deep down in her heart, Lou wanted to know.
Deputy Dwight knocked on the door and entered with a tray of coffee and doughnuts. He placed the tray on the desk.
"Annie's finest. You won't find better doughnuts anywhere." With that, Dwight left the office with a doughnut in his pudgy hand.
"Hey, Dwight, what have I told you?" Lou warned.
Dwight briskly walked away unable to answer with a mouth full of doughnut.
"If Beau Flucker doesn't show up soon we're going to have to take his disappearance seriously. It could be for real this time," Merlot insisted. She chuckled. "Flucker . . . I'd run away with a name like that."
Sure this could be for real, thought Lou, but her trusty gut was telling her that Beau's disappearance was just a hoax. Lou gave Merlot a thoughtful look. It was better than looking at Willis. She didn't trust herself.
"He'll show up and when he does he'll say Bigfoot took him." She shrugged her shoulders, "Or that aliens abducted him."
"You can be that sure?" Willis asked in his regulation, matter-of-fact voice.
"I'm one-hundred percent sure, Agent Johnson. This is just one of his many little hoaxes," Lou declared, giving him an icy stare.
"For now we tend to agree." Willis paused, looking thoughtful. "Does Duane still have that old cabin of his father's?"
Lou nodded yes. She frowned. She didn't like the way the conversation was going. Willis couldn't possibly think that Duane had kidnapped Beau.
"Lives there permanent now," Lou declared somewhat nervously.
"It's a perfect place to hide Beau."
Lou gave Willis a curious glance.
What was he up to?
Of course, he could be right in thinking that Duane was in on Beau's little joke. If there was one thing Duane liked it was a good prank, thought Lou. But nevertheless, she didn't think Duane was involved. This case seemed different somehow, especially now that the FBI was involved.
Merlot joined in on the conversation. "Your report states, there's a possibility Beau might have been attacked by a grizzly . . . but you haven't found any trace of an animal attack where he was last seen."
"That's correct. Mocking Bird did a thorough investigation of the area and found nothing to support that scenario."
"This Mocking Bird . . ." Merlot couldn't help grinning as she said his name. ". . . is the local crypto-zoologist? I take it he knows his business?"
"He's the best." Lou gave a furtive glance towards the man who had broken her heart.
Why did they have to send him? Damn it!
Her broken heart told her he was just as good looking as the day he left, he just needed to get out of those clothes, let the stubble grow a tad and loosen up a whole lot.
Get a grip on yourself, urged Lou. No, no, no, don't even think it. It's over. He broke your heart. You'd have fallen apart if Duane hadn't been there. Not like Willis Johnson, the heartless bastard. She more than ever felt like taking a swipe at him and knew if he stayed much longer in town, she'd do just that.
MERLOT FOUND HER GAZE wandering around the office to the board on the wall behind her partner's head. Pinned to the board were six color photographs. Three pairs of shots displayed a shower cubicle or bath completely fouled with clumps of fur. Two toilet rims displayed an uneaten doughnut. She grimaced at the crime scenes luridly on display, thinking,
how could anyone eat on the pan?
Merlot was curious, "Uh . . . I'm curious about those photos."
Lou appeared relieved
"Yeah, we know," Merlot agreed. "Kids!"
"Yeah, kids!" Lou sighed. She glanced at the heartless bastard. She remembered the time he and Duane had pulled the same prank, claiming that a harem of Bigfoot babes had abducted them and had forced them to do certain things of a sexual nature. Willis could have fun back then, but what about now? Deep down in her heart, Lou wanted to know.
Deputy Dwight knocked on the door and entered with a tray of coffee and doughnuts. He placed the tray on the desk.
"Annie's finest. You won't find better doughnuts anywhere." With that, Dwight left the office with a doughnut in his pudgy hand.
"Hey, Dwight, what have I told you?" Lou warned.
Dwight briskly walked away unable to answer with a mouth full of doughnut.
"If Beau Flucker doesn't show up soon we're going to have to take his disappearance seriously. It could be for real this time," Merlot insisted. She chuckled. "Flucker . . . I'd run away with a name like that."
Sure this could be for real, thought Lou, but her trusty gut was telling her that Beau's disappearance was just a hoax. Lou gave Merlot a thoughtful look. It was better than looking at Willis. She didn't trust herself.
"He'll show up and when he does he'll say Bigfoot took him." She shrugged her shoulders, "Or that aliens abducted him."
"You can be that sure?" Willis asked in his regulation, matter-of-fact voice.
"I'm one-hundred percent sure, Agent Johnson. This is just one of his many little hoaxes," Lou declared, giving him an icy stare.
"For now we tend to agree." Willis paused, looking thoughtful. "Does Duane still have that old cabin of his father's?"
Lou nodded yes. She frowned. She didn't like the way the conversation was going. Willis couldn't possibly think that Duane had kidnapped Beau.
"Lives there permanent now," Lou declared somewhat nervously.
"It's a perfect place to hide Beau."
Lou gave Willis a curious glance.
What was he up to?
Of course, he could be right in thinking that Duane was in on Beau's little joke. If there was one thing Duane liked it was a good prank, thought Lou. But nevertheless, she didn't think Duane was involved. This case seemed different somehow, especially now that the FBI was involved.
Merlot joined in on the conversation. "Your report states, there's a possibility Beau might have been attacked by a grizzly . . . but you haven't found any trace of an animal attack where he was last seen."
"That's correct. Mocking Bird did a thorough investigation of the area and found nothing to support that scenario."
"This Mocking Bird . . ." Merlot couldn't help grinning as she said his name. ". . . is the local crypto-zoologist? I take it he knows his business?"
"He's the best." Lou gave a furtive glance towards the man who had broken her heart.
Why did they have to send him? Damn it!
Her broken heart told her he was just as good looking as the day he left, he just needed to get out of those clothes, let the stubble grow a tad and loosen up a whole lot.
Get a grip on yourself, urged Lou. No, no, no, don't even think it. It's over. He broke your heart. You'd have fallen apart if Duane hadn't been there. Not like Willis Johnson, the heartless bastard. She more than ever felt like taking a swipe at him and knew if he stayed much longer in town, she'd do just that.
MERLOT FOUND HER GAZE wandering around the office to the board on the wall behind her partner's head. Pinned to the board were six color photographs. Three pairs of shots displayed a shower cubicle or bath completely fouled with clumps of fur. Two toilet rims displayed an uneaten doughnut. She grimaced at the crime scenes luridly on display, thinking,
how could anyone eat on the pan?
Merlot was curious, "Uh . . . I'm curious about those photos."
Lou appeared relieved
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