Nightmare in Night Court by N. M. Silber Page B

we have a moment, let’s compare notes.”
    “Okay, for round one, I have this Mr. Marley, charged with trespass and prowling at night,” he said picking up a file and furrowing his brows. “He’s odd.”
    “No, really?  Imagine that,” I commented, dryly.
    “I mean odd even for Philly criminal court,” he clarified.
    “How so?” I leaned against the table and looked up at my handsome husband. There were still moments that I couldn’t believe that a clumsy, socially awkward woman like me, had charmed a gorgeous, sexy, guy like him. Braden loved me, though, quirks and all. In fact, I suspected that he loved me because of them.
    “It’s weird, I can’t put my finger on it exactly, something about the way he talks, and the way he’s dressed.”
    “He’s wearing a suit,” I noted, looking up at the gallery, where people sat waiting for cases to be heard. Mr. Marley was staring at a wall as if he were watching it do something. Okay, I could see Braden’s point.
    “Yeah, but it’s the cut of it …”
    “The cut of it? What are you, his tailor?”
    “I don’t know.” He shrugged, looking sheepish. “It’s probably my imagination.”
    “Oh wait, he’s the guy whose file said that he died in 1905. So, there you go. He’s odd because he’s been dead for over a century.”
    “Yeah, right.” Braden rolled his eyes. “They still haven’t gotten that straightened out by the way. His case is all messed up. It’s listed on the docket for October 31 st , but the year of his trial is also listed as 1905. There must have been some glitch in Records.”
    “Either that or he’s a ghost.”
    “Well then, I should introduce him to them.” Braden gestured at a team of guys in black t-shirts and ball caps who were laying wire and setting up some kind of equipment.
    “Who are they? They don’t look like the Maintenance Department. For one thing, they’re not sitting in the lobby eating doughnuts.”
    “Don’t you recognize the Spirit Hunters Team from television? They’re here to try to capture paranormal activity.”
    “Well, they’re in the right place. Nothing here is normal.”
    “How’s your close encounter of the annoying kind going?”
    “Mr. Smith has an urgent need to return to the Mother Ship as soon as possible. He’s has warned me that Earth’s gravitational pull might result in him imploding into a puddle of green slime.”
    “That would suck.”
    “Yeah, especially since nothing involving Night Court is urgent to the Feds. It’s going to be a green bloodbath.” I nodded. “How about your other case?”
    “Delores Crowley? She’s a strange woman who does creepy things.”
    “Have small children mysteriously gone missing in her yard?”
    “Nah, she’s charged with Disorderly Conduct, and Terroristic Threats.” He glanced at the file he was holding. “Oh, and, uh, littering.”
    “Glad they tacked that on there. God forbid, a disorderly litterbug walk free. What’s her story?”
    “She’s an exorcist.”
    “Who did she threaten, Satan? And more importantly, will he be testifying?”  You needed to have a sense of humor in this business. And alcohol. It was also important to have alcohol.
    “Testifying for the Commonwealth will be Mr. Evan Drake. You’re going to love Ev. Trust me. He’s such a winner.” Braden smiled.
    “Even better. Speaking of people who you would never want to bring home to meet mom, my other client is Mr. Bates. There’s something really creepy about him .”
    “How so?’
    “He has a weird way of staring at you, and he’s so pale and still.”
    “What’s he charged with?”
    “Abuse of a corpse. He’s an undertaker’s assistant.”
    “That last one might be the biggest reason he’s creepy. Just sayin’. ”
    “Yeah. I should introduce him to Mr. Marley. He likes dead people.”
    Just then Judge Epstein summoned Braden, so I decided that I would chat with the Crypt Keeper some more. He was sitting in the only shadow in the entire