Never Say Never by Victoria Christopher Murray Page A

continued, “Charlie is going to stop by to see a couple of his friends. Will you and the boys be all right?”
    â€œDefinitely. By the time you get back, the house will probably be filled with folks.”
    â€œOkay. I have my cell if you need me,” she said before she stepped out of the bedroom.
    No matter what Mama Cee said, I needed to get up and at least check on my sons. But I needed just a few more moments. Because here, in bed, was where I felt closest to Chauncey.
    I reached for the pillow where he’d laid his head just four days ago and rubbed my hand across the case. Then I pulled it as close to my chest as I possibly could, and squeezed.
    â€œChauncey,” I whispered. “Chauncey, Chauncey, Chauncey.”

    When the doorbell rang, I moaned. Even though it was almost noon, I hadn’t even been out of bed for an hour and I wasn’t ready for company. At least I was dressed, if you could call my jeans and T-shirt being dressed.
    But when I opened the door, I was grateful once again.
    â€œI should’ve known it was you.” I stepped aside so that Jamal could come in. “You don’t have to check on me every day.”
    He wrapped me in his arms, giving me that morning hug that had helped me through the last three days. “Well, I’m not here for you,” he said, stepping back. My frown made him chuckle. “I told the boys last night that I would take them out this afternoon.”
    â€œReally? They didn’t say anything to me.”
    â€œI just kinda figured they needed a break. They haven’t been outside since . . . you know. So, I’m going to take them out to lunch.”
    â€œJamal, thank you!” I turned toward the stairs. “They’re up in Mikey and Steve’s room just watching TV and playing video games. I’ll get them.”
    Jamal called over my shoulder, “No, let me get them ready.”
    I moved away from the steps, then watched as Jamal trotted up the stairs to the room that the boys had been sharing since my mother-in-law and brother-in-law arrived. Minutes later, the boys bolted down the stairs with Jamal behind them.
    I kissed them all good-bye, hugged Jamal, then stood at the door and waved at my sons until Jamal’s car was out of sight. When I turned around and closed the door, there was nothing but silence.
    Last night the house had been filled with so many people, chatting, and laughing, and eating the food that overflowed. Everyone had been here to support me, but in truth, it all just irked me. Because while they continued to live, my life had stopped. But no one seemed to get that, and after a while, all I wanted was to be left alone.
    But now I was by myself and this didn’t feel so good either.
    I wandered into the living room and stopped in front of the fireplace, taking in the pictorial history that revealed just how happy my twelve years with Chauncey Williams had been. I studied the photo we’d taken after our Friday afternoon, city hall wedding, exactly one week after Chauncey had proposed.
    Emily and Michellelee stood by my side and Jamal stood beside Chauncey. Thinking about the hope I had that day brought new tears and I bit my lip, trying to hold them back. I was so tired of crying.
    I moved over to the photo at the other end of the mantel—the picture where I sat in a high-backed chair that looked like a throne,with all of my men holding court. The last family picture we’d taken three months ago. The final picture.
    No matter how much I tried, a tear rolled down my cheek.
    In the middle of all the pictures on the mantel was a stone that Chauncey had picked up on our two-night honeymoon in Santa Barbara. It was right outside the cottage that we never left once we arrived that Friday night. And then, on Sunday, when it was time to go home, Chauncey picked up this stone, saying he had to take a piece of our honeymoon with him.
    When we got back to his apartment,