cared. I was beyond caring.
When Taylor said, “Hey, Lex,” I said nothing. When she asked in a voice as soft and familiar as the Hello Kitty pillow I’d slept with since I was two, “How are you feeling?” I said nothing. Zero. Zilch.
“Okayyy,” Rae said, filling the silence. “So we’re meeting at my house at seven. My mom is all, ‘I’ll drive you girls,’ and I’m like, ‘Hell no, woman! We are not showing up in a minivan, we are taking the bus .’”
“Right,” Kendall said. “We are busin’ it.”
Last year, Taylor and I walked to school. The junior high was half a mile from my house, and the LeFevres were on the way, so I would pick up Tay and the two of us would walk together. Even if it was raining or frigid cold outside, even if one of our parents offered to drive, we still walked. We liked to walk. But this year was different. The senior high was all the way across town, so anyone on our side of the highway who didn’t have their license yet took the bus. Correction: anyone who planned to attend high school and didn’t have their license yet took the bus.
I did not plan to attend high school. The day after the barbecue, I’d made my position clear. “Hire a tutor,” I told my parents. “Sign me up for GED courses online. Homeschool me. I don’t care. But I am not going.”
And that is what I said now, to Kendall and Rae and Taylor: “I’m not going to school tomorrow.”
“So, what,” Kendall said, “are you starting next week?”
“No.”
“Did the doctor say you had to wait?”
“It has nothing to do with that,” I said. The truth. At my last checkup I’d learned my face was healing “beautifully,” and as long as I kept the graft hydrated and wore sunscreen every day I didn’t even need bandages. I could resume all of my “normal” activities.
“So…” Rae said.
“So, I just don’t want to go back to school.”
“Like … at all?”
“Right.”
“Are you serious?” Taylor sounded genuinely shocked. “Is this because of what happened with me and Ryan?”
It’s the first time she’s mentioned his name, and suddenly I’m like the girl from The Exorcist , head spinning around and puke flying from my mouth. “Because of what happened ? With you and Ryan ? What happened with you and Ryan , exactly? Enlighten me.”
“Here we go,” Rae murmured.
“Lex,” Taylor said quietly. “Let’s not do this over the phone. We need to talk in person.”
I gave a snort that said, Never gonna happen.
“What do you want me to say?” Her voice was low, pleading. “Tell me and I’ll say it.”
“Tell you what to say ? You want me to hand you a script ?” I hated the way I sounded. I hated it, but I couldn’t help myself. “It’s not that complicated, Taylor. A baby could do it! A newborn baby could apologize better than you can!”
Then she actually had the nerve to get mad. “What do you think I’ve been trying to do? Why do you think I’ve been calling you every five minutes for the past month? What am I supposed to do when you keep blowing me off?”
“Oh, this is my fault now?”
“It’s not like I haven’t been punished,” Taylor said, her voice rising. “My dad grounded me for two weeks!”
“Oooo. Two whole weeks.”
“Come on, guys,” Kendall said. “Don’t do this.”
“Yeah,” Rae chimed in, “life is too short. And you’ve been friends for too long.”
When I heard those words, they hit me literally. “You’ve been friends for too long.” “You’re right,” I said. “This friendship is beyond over.”
“You don’t mean that,” Rae said.
“Yeah. I do.”
My throat thickened, but I pushed past it. I told Taylor that I meant what I said. I told her to stop calling me. I told her to stop texting me. I told her, for the very last time, to stay out of my life.
I didn’t even give her a chance to respond. After I hung up, I sat on the couch, holding the phone in my lap and waiting for it to ring.
It
When Taylor said, “Hey, Lex,” I said nothing. When she asked in a voice as soft and familiar as the Hello Kitty pillow I’d slept with since I was two, “How are you feeling?” I said nothing. Zero. Zilch.
“Okayyy,” Rae said, filling the silence. “So we’re meeting at my house at seven. My mom is all, ‘I’ll drive you girls,’ and I’m like, ‘Hell no, woman! We are not showing up in a minivan, we are taking the bus .’”
“Right,” Kendall said. “We are busin’ it.”
Last year, Taylor and I walked to school. The junior high was half a mile from my house, and the LeFevres were on the way, so I would pick up Tay and the two of us would walk together. Even if it was raining or frigid cold outside, even if one of our parents offered to drive, we still walked. We liked to walk. But this year was different. The senior high was all the way across town, so anyone on our side of the highway who didn’t have their license yet took the bus. Correction: anyone who planned to attend high school and didn’t have their license yet took the bus.
I did not plan to attend high school. The day after the barbecue, I’d made my position clear. “Hire a tutor,” I told my parents. “Sign me up for GED courses online. Homeschool me. I don’t care. But I am not going.”
And that is what I said now, to Kendall and Rae and Taylor: “I’m not going to school tomorrow.”
“So, what,” Kendall said, “are you starting next week?”
“No.”
“Did the doctor say you had to wait?”
“It has nothing to do with that,” I said. The truth. At my last checkup I’d learned my face was healing “beautifully,” and as long as I kept the graft hydrated and wore sunscreen every day I didn’t even need bandages. I could resume all of my “normal” activities.
“So…” Rae said.
“So, I just don’t want to go back to school.”
“Like … at all?”
“Right.”
“Are you serious?” Taylor sounded genuinely shocked. “Is this because of what happened with me and Ryan?”
It’s the first time she’s mentioned his name, and suddenly I’m like the girl from The Exorcist , head spinning around and puke flying from my mouth. “Because of what happened ? With you and Ryan ? What happened with you and Ryan , exactly? Enlighten me.”
“Here we go,” Rae murmured.
“Lex,” Taylor said quietly. “Let’s not do this over the phone. We need to talk in person.”
I gave a snort that said, Never gonna happen.
“What do you want me to say?” Her voice was low, pleading. “Tell me and I’ll say it.”
“Tell you what to say ? You want me to hand you a script ?” I hated the way I sounded. I hated it, but I couldn’t help myself. “It’s not that complicated, Taylor. A baby could do it! A newborn baby could apologize better than you can!”
Then she actually had the nerve to get mad. “What do you think I’ve been trying to do? Why do you think I’ve been calling you every five minutes for the past month? What am I supposed to do when you keep blowing me off?”
“Oh, this is my fault now?”
“It’s not like I haven’t been punished,” Taylor said, her voice rising. “My dad grounded me for two weeks!”
“Oooo. Two whole weeks.”
“Come on, guys,” Kendall said. “Don’t do this.”
“Yeah,” Rae chimed in, “life is too short. And you’ve been friends for too long.”
When I heard those words, they hit me literally. “You’ve been friends for too long.” “You’re right,” I said. “This friendship is beyond over.”
“You don’t mean that,” Rae said.
“Yeah. I do.”
My throat thickened, but I pushed past it. I told Taylor that I meant what I said. I told her to stop calling me. I told her to stop texting me. I told her, for the very last time, to stay out of my life.
I didn’t even give her a chance to respond. After I hung up, I sat on the couch, holding the phone in my lap and waiting for it to ring.
It
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