Motherland by William Nicholson

hand between her legs, moving right up inside her knickers, and she becomes still. She wants his touch so much that she’s holding her breath. He strokes her
there
, and she shivers with nervous intensity. His touch makes her body new for her, as if
there
has never been discovered before. He explores her unknown land, he inhabits her. She lets her legs part so that his hand can move more freely over her and into her.
    I’m all yours, Eddy. All of me is yours.
    Now she’s undoing the hooks and eyes of her suspender belt and letting it fall away. His hands slip inside the waistband of her army knickers, blessedly invisible in the dark, and pull them down over her buttocks and thighs. She helps him with twists of her legs to get them off. Now all she’s wearing are her lisle stockings.
    His hand is back between her legs, stroking, probing, burrowing. She feels for his erection, and holds it between her palms. Her eyes have become more accustomed to the dark, and the single thread of light lets her see a little. She looks up to his face and thinks she sees him smiling at her.
    ‘Ah!’
    She gives a gasp of surprise. His fingers have found a place to touch that sends shocks of pleasure all through her body.
    ‘Oh, Eddy! Oh, Eddy!’
    He kisses her breasts, lingering over the nipples, tweaking them with his lips. Kitty feels as if she has never had a body before, as if his touch creates it. She wants to hold him so close, so close that she ceases to exist. She wants to give herself to him and lose herself in him.
    ‘Darling,’ she whispers. ‘Darling, darling.’
    He moves his body over hers and she parts her legs, making herself open for him, longing for him. She feels the push, the soft head nuzzling at her crotch, seeking the way in. She wriggles her hips and it finds its place, and rests there.
    He lowers his face to hers to kiss her. As his lips touch hers, he gives a little push, and it’s in. Just the tip, but it’s begun.
    Kitty feels her heart pounding, scrambling all rational thought. Somewhere far away there are things she should be concerned about, but she doesn’t want to know. She wants to possess him. She wants all of him in all of her.
    He moves again, and penetrates a little deeper. She can tell from his breathing that he’s excited. Then she feels a spasm of pain, and makes a sound. He stops. For a brief moment of terror she thinks, He can’t do it. I’m too small for him. But all the time she can feel herself opening up. And now he’s moving again, and it hurts but she doesn’t make a sound, and he’s deeper in.
    This is his desire. His desire is hot and hard. The deeper into me he goes, the more he wants me.
    Now he’s all the way in. She can feel the weight of his body on hers. He lies still, letting her grow accustomed to the sensation. For Kitty this is the time, when he’s inside her but neither of them are moving, this is the time she remembers for the rest of her life. Their haven of love.
    He’s mine. We’ll never be parted now.
    ‘Darling,’ she whispers. ‘Darling.’
    He starts to move, drawing almost all the way out, then pushing back all the way in. Kitty feels the pain again.
    ‘Slowly,’ she whispers.
    He moves slowly after that, and when he’s all the way in he pauses. Then out, then in. The sweet pause.
    ‘Oh, God!’ he cries.
    ‘What is it?’
    A shudder goes through his body. His hips convulse in a series of sharp jerks. She feels him twitch inside her. Then he lies still.
    So it’s happened. She thinks she can feel it, a liquid warmth, but maybe she imagines it. This is what they do it for. This is the prize.
    ‘Was it good?’ she whispers.
    He grunts. She realises that whatever it is he has just experienced, it has half-stunned him. All his limbs have gone slack. His weight is heavy on her. She doesn’t mind, she wraps her arms round him, holds him tight. His moment of helplessness touches her deeply. Then all at once she has the strangest thought.
    He has