anyone to get to the crib.”
Several seconds of stunned silence passed before Kim finally spoke. “You need a…which one of you…”
“Lily’s having a baby.”
“Oh…my…God!” Kim practically flung Alice into Hal’s arms and leapt off the couch squealing, unable to decide whether to hug Anna or Lily first. They saved her the trouble and met in a group hug that was quickly joined by the others.
Anna waited until everyone had settled down to address their barrage of questions. “I’ll tell you everything we know, which isn’t much. Our due date is June first. We’ve seen the sonogram but it’s too early to know the sex, but Beth says things look—and I quote—normal, normal, normal.”
“Who’s the father?” Kim blurted.
She nodded at Lily’s questioning glance. They had agreed to keep most of the details private, but that didn’t include their family or their closest friends.
“Anonymous,” Lily answered. “We didn’t want people looking at our two children and thinking they weren’t related, so we tried to imagine what Andy’s father looked like. Beth had a huge database of donors and we chose a Latino man, a college student majoring in science who plays sports.”
“But here’s the real fun. We aren’t even sure who the mother is.” Anna went on to explain the procedure, including their two failed attempts. “We probably won’t know until it’s born. If it comes out holding a cheeseburger, it’s Lily’s.”
“And if it drives out, it’s Anna’s.”
For Andy, the excitement was over and he slithered onto the floor to resume playing with Jonah, who was boasting that he was already a big brother. With their family meeting finished, Anna noted Kim’s beckoning look and followed her upstairs.
“I can’t believe Lily rode all the way up here without telling me. Now I know why she was asking me all those questions about whether or not I missed working.”
“What did she say? We’ve been talking about that. Lily says she wants to go back to work after the baby comes, which means we’ll probably have to hire a nanny. You got any leads?”
“Trust me, that’s not going to happen no matter how much she insists on it now. I can see it all over her. Once that baby comes she won’t be able to walk out the door without it. She could hardly tear herself away from Andy.”
“But you always say it makes you nuts to be home with the kids all day.”
“That’s where you come in. You need to come home from work on time.” Kim emphasized her point by poking Anna in the chest. “You need to eat whatever Lily wants for dinner and watch what she wants on TV. Don’t think just because you’ve been at work all day that you’re the only one who has a right to be tired. Wash the dishes. Walk the dog. Play with Andy. And don’t wait for Lily to ask you to do it.”
“This may come as a shock to you, but I do those things already.”
“Whatever you’re doing now, double it. No, triple it. And don’t wait until the baby comes. Start right now. Treat her like a queen and make her comfort your top priority. And whatever you do, don’t disagree with her.”
“Oh, I figured that out weeks ago. How long are these mood swings going to last?”
“Potentially forever, and don’t call them mood swings,” she said sharply. “That’s patronizing, like you think she’s being ridiculous but it’s okay because of her hormones. What Lily needs more than anything else is for you to feel every single backache, cramp and hemorrhoid as if it were your own. Everything good is a reason to eat ice cream and everything bad is your fault. Got it?”
Anna nodded tentatively as she took in her sister’s version of pregnancy and child care, acknowledging a whole new respect for what her brother-in-law had endured as he awaited the birth of his children. “If I promise to treat all of that advice like a holy book, can I ask you a serious question?”
Kim looked at her pointedly, as if to
Several seconds of stunned silence passed before Kim finally spoke. “You need a…which one of you…”
“Lily’s having a baby.”
“Oh…my…God!” Kim practically flung Alice into Hal’s arms and leapt off the couch squealing, unable to decide whether to hug Anna or Lily first. They saved her the trouble and met in a group hug that was quickly joined by the others.
Anna waited until everyone had settled down to address their barrage of questions. “I’ll tell you everything we know, which isn’t much. Our due date is June first. We’ve seen the sonogram but it’s too early to know the sex, but Beth says things look—and I quote—normal, normal, normal.”
“Who’s the father?” Kim blurted.
She nodded at Lily’s questioning glance. They had agreed to keep most of the details private, but that didn’t include their family or their closest friends.
“Anonymous,” Lily answered. “We didn’t want people looking at our two children and thinking they weren’t related, so we tried to imagine what Andy’s father looked like. Beth had a huge database of donors and we chose a Latino man, a college student majoring in science who plays sports.”
“But here’s the real fun. We aren’t even sure who the mother is.” Anna went on to explain the procedure, including their two failed attempts. “We probably won’t know until it’s born. If it comes out holding a cheeseburger, it’s Lily’s.”
“And if it drives out, it’s Anna’s.”
For Andy, the excitement was over and he slithered onto the floor to resume playing with Jonah, who was boasting that he was already a big brother. With their family meeting finished, Anna noted Kim’s beckoning look and followed her upstairs.
“I can’t believe Lily rode all the way up here without telling me. Now I know why she was asking me all those questions about whether or not I missed working.”
“What did she say? We’ve been talking about that. Lily says she wants to go back to work after the baby comes, which means we’ll probably have to hire a nanny. You got any leads?”
“Trust me, that’s not going to happen no matter how much she insists on it now. I can see it all over her. Once that baby comes she won’t be able to walk out the door without it. She could hardly tear herself away from Andy.”
“But you always say it makes you nuts to be home with the kids all day.”
“That’s where you come in. You need to come home from work on time.” Kim emphasized her point by poking Anna in the chest. “You need to eat whatever Lily wants for dinner and watch what she wants on TV. Don’t think just because you’ve been at work all day that you’re the only one who has a right to be tired. Wash the dishes. Walk the dog. Play with Andy. And don’t wait for Lily to ask you to do it.”
“This may come as a shock to you, but I do those things already.”
“Whatever you’re doing now, double it. No, triple it. And don’t wait until the baby comes. Start right now. Treat her like a queen and make her comfort your top priority. And whatever you do, don’t disagree with her.”
“Oh, I figured that out weeks ago. How long are these mood swings going to last?”
“Potentially forever, and don’t call them mood swings,” she said sharply. “That’s patronizing, like you think she’s being ridiculous but it’s okay because of her hormones. What Lily needs more than anything else is for you to feel every single backache, cramp and hemorrhoid as if it were your own. Everything good is a reason to eat ice cream and everything bad is your fault. Got it?”
Anna nodded tentatively as she took in her sister’s version of pregnancy and child care, acknowledging a whole new respect for what her brother-in-law had endured as he awaited the birth of his children. “If I promise to treat all of that advice like a holy book, can I ask you a serious question?”
Kim looked at her pointedly, as if to
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