Monster's Chef by Jervey Tervalon

didn’t plan to pay that kind of dues.
    â€œLook, Thug, I’m not into hooking up and all. I’m a married man.”
    He kept smiling as though he wasn’t listening to me. His hands were huge. I wouldn’t want to fight him without a bat in my hands, and even then I’m not sure it would be fair. I crossed the room to where the fireplace tools were. I didn’t reach for the poker, but it felt good to have it near at hand.
    â€œI appreciate you doing all that for me. I’ll buy you a beer or something.”
    Thug laughed boyishly and stretched out on the bed.
    â€œGibson, you and me, we need to talk.”
    â€œYeah, well, we’re talking now.”
    â€œYeah, you right. But we need to quit all this bullshit and really just kick back and talk.”
    Thug wore this gigantic Joe Montana throwback jersey, as if Joe were big as Shaq. In one quick move he slipped the jersey over his head and tossed it to the floor. He had no flab beneath that jersey, nothing but black buffed muscle.
    â€œWhy you gonna be like that?”
    Thug’s dark skin glistened against the white sheets as if he had oiled himself before this so-called chance encounter.
    I panicked as his hands reached for the buttons of his ridiculous Sean John jeans. If he slid his pants down, I’d grab the poker, though grabbing the poker suddenly seemed very embarrassing.
    â€œDon’t look so hard like you gonna try to beat me down.”
    I nodded silently, praying he would leave.
    â€œI know all about your thing with Rita. I got photographs.”
    â€œKnow what? There’s nothing to know.”
    The big man sat up and leaned forward for a manila envelope and reached inside. In his hand he held grainy blowups of me and Rita.
    â€œThat’s a nice one of you two kissing. I haven’t shown that to Monster. I don’t think he needs to know.”
    â€œThat was my fault. She didn’t want to. I took advantage of her.”
    Thug laughed. “What? You supposed to be a hero or something? All kind of shit goes on here. You think she ain’t getting paid? That’s why we’re all here, Monster pays from a big roll of bills and we’re all lined up with our hands out, even you, my brother. Rita’s getting paid, paid enough so she’ll never worry about money even if she lives to be one hundred and fifty.”
    â€œPaid? Isn’t she supposed to be his wife?”
    Thug laughed again, like he wanted the whole world to know he was amused.
    â€œDo you really think Monster is into women? Shit, he’s about as interested in bitches as I am. But that’s not true. I’ve had my share, and I’ve got a couple kids to prove it, but I’d bet my life that Monster has never been with a woman.”
    I sighed, thinking of Rita.
    â€œSo, what I’m saying is don’t be naive. We’re all in this for the same reason.” Then Thug’s seriousness faded and the smile returned. He was ready to get down to business.
    â€œIt’s too bad about you not having an open mind ’cause we could have had us a good time,” he said, with a big countrified grin.
    â€œSorry, Thug. Look, I’m not putting you down or anything.”
    â€œCool. Just keep grilling my steaks. Monster wants me to get into that Living Food bullshit. I’d starve first.”
    He stood up to leave and laughed when he saw my hand on the poker.
    â€œOne thing I need to know before I bail up out of here.”
    â€œYeah,” I said, waiting for the question, but Thug took his time, crossing and uncrossing his arms.
    â€œSo what’s with you passing for white? First time I saw you I knew you was a nigga.”
    â€œWho said I was passing?”
    â€œYou ain’t?”
    â€œNo, man. I am what I am.”
    â€œWhat, you Popeye or something?”
    â€œWhat’s that supposed to mean?”
    Thug shrugged and walked toward me. I stepped aside, and he turned