kids?” he asked, making me chuckle that he remembered.
“It’s not like it’s intentional. My boss teases me about the tight ship I run, but I like things orderly. At least elementary-aged kids don’t scare as easily as the kids at the daycare,” I mused, thinking back to the days when he and I had dated. I was working part-time at the daycare on campus and it had become a long-standing joke with my co-workers how the babies all seemed scared of me. It wasn’t like I ever yelled or anything, but I guess a serious tone of voice was just as frightening. Anytime the other teachers lost control of their classes, I was the one they called. Justin and my friends had found thewhole thing hilarious and nicknamed me “Drill Sergeant.” The only kid who ever seemed immune to my voice was Justin’s sister, Hollie.
“You’re lucky. You seem like you’ve been able to put it out of your mind and move on,” he said in a voice that was hard to distinguish. I couldn’t tell if he was being sarcastic or cordial.
For a moment, I considered punching him. A quick punch to the jaw or maybe to the gut. It was awfully presumptuous of him to think I could erase it from my mind. In the beginning, it consumed my every thought. Eventually, time heals, I guess, because the pain tapered off to where I would only think of it a handful of times a day. Now, if I was lucky, I could go a whole day without thinking about it. He was an asshole to think I’d ever be able to forget. Let alone move on.
14.
Thanksgiving 2010
“I changed my mind,” I said, sinking down on my bed as Justin paced the narrow floor in front of me.
“You can’t change your mind. It’s all Hollie has been talking about. She’s looking forward to seeing you.”
“I’m sure I’ll be over there in the next few days. Just not today.”
“Why not today?” Justin implored, running his hand over his hair in frustration.
“Because.”
“Because? What the hell kind of answer is because? Because why?”
“Because . . .” I dragged out. “Spending the holidays withyour family seems too fast, too soon. It’s something a couple does when they’ve been dating for a couple of years, not weeks. For God’s sake, we haven’t even made it past third base.”
“Third base? Does anyone still use that term?” he laughed.
“Shut up, jerk. You know what I mean.”
“Okay. Let’s fix that right now,” he answered, sweeping his eyes around my room. Melissa had left the night before to spend the four-day holiday with her folks. She wanted me to come with her, but I was too broke to buy a plane ticket, so I lied and told her I’d be spending the holiday with Justin and his family.
“Gee, how can I resist such a romantic gesture? Besides, your family is expecting you,” I said weakly as he approached me.
“They’re expecting both of us,” he murmured, stepping between my parted legs that were hanging off the side of the bed. His hands gently cupped my face, tipping my head back until our eyes met. Everything inside me came to life as he slowly lowered me back on my bed. He moaned with desire as his lips found my neck. I felt his hand making its way beneath my shirt, sending shudders rippling through my body.
“Do you like that?” he whispered against my lips.
“Mmm-hmm,” was my only answer as I shifted so he could lie fully on top of me. It had been a while since I had been with a guy whose every touch left me yearning for more.
“What about this?” he asked, moving his hand slightly lower so his fingers slipped just inside the band of my jeans.
I nodded, unable to speak as the sensations from his touch muddled my brain. I wanted his hands everywhere. Hiscallused palm against the sensitive skin of my lower stomach made my body arch in a silent plea for more.
“Brittni, you keep moving like that and I’m going to skip third base and slide into home,” he said, pulling his lips from mine. I could tell by his glassy-eyed stare that he
“It’s not like it’s intentional. My boss teases me about the tight ship I run, but I like things orderly. At least elementary-aged kids don’t scare as easily as the kids at the daycare,” I mused, thinking back to the days when he and I had dated. I was working part-time at the daycare on campus and it had become a long-standing joke with my co-workers how the babies all seemed scared of me. It wasn’t like I ever yelled or anything, but I guess a serious tone of voice was just as frightening. Anytime the other teachers lost control of their classes, I was the one they called. Justin and my friends had found thewhole thing hilarious and nicknamed me “Drill Sergeant.” The only kid who ever seemed immune to my voice was Justin’s sister, Hollie.
“You’re lucky. You seem like you’ve been able to put it out of your mind and move on,” he said in a voice that was hard to distinguish. I couldn’t tell if he was being sarcastic or cordial.
For a moment, I considered punching him. A quick punch to the jaw or maybe to the gut. It was awfully presumptuous of him to think I could erase it from my mind. In the beginning, it consumed my every thought. Eventually, time heals, I guess, because the pain tapered off to where I would only think of it a handful of times a day. Now, if I was lucky, I could go a whole day without thinking about it. He was an asshole to think I’d ever be able to forget. Let alone move on.
14.
Thanksgiving 2010
“I changed my mind,” I said, sinking down on my bed as Justin paced the narrow floor in front of me.
“You can’t change your mind. It’s all Hollie has been talking about. She’s looking forward to seeing you.”
“I’m sure I’ll be over there in the next few days. Just not today.”
“Why not today?” Justin implored, running his hand over his hair in frustration.
“Because.”
“Because? What the hell kind of answer is because? Because why?”
“Because . . .” I dragged out. “Spending the holidays withyour family seems too fast, too soon. It’s something a couple does when they’ve been dating for a couple of years, not weeks. For God’s sake, we haven’t even made it past third base.”
“Third base? Does anyone still use that term?” he laughed.
“Shut up, jerk. You know what I mean.”
“Okay. Let’s fix that right now,” he answered, sweeping his eyes around my room. Melissa had left the night before to spend the four-day holiday with her folks. She wanted me to come with her, but I was too broke to buy a plane ticket, so I lied and told her I’d be spending the holiday with Justin and his family.
“Gee, how can I resist such a romantic gesture? Besides, your family is expecting you,” I said weakly as he approached me.
“They’re expecting both of us,” he murmured, stepping between my parted legs that were hanging off the side of the bed. His hands gently cupped my face, tipping my head back until our eyes met. Everything inside me came to life as he slowly lowered me back on my bed. He moaned with desire as his lips found my neck. I felt his hand making its way beneath my shirt, sending shudders rippling through my body.
“Do you like that?” he whispered against my lips.
“Mmm-hmm,” was my only answer as I shifted so he could lie fully on top of me. It had been a while since I had been with a guy whose every touch left me yearning for more.
“What about this?” he asked, moving his hand slightly lower so his fingers slipped just inside the band of my jeans.
I nodded, unable to speak as the sensations from his touch muddled my brain. I wanted his hands everywhere. Hiscallused palm against the sensitive skin of my lower stomach made my body arch in a silent plea for more.
“Brittni, you keep moving like that and I’m going to skip third base and slide into home,” he said, pulling his lips from mine. I could tell by his glassy-eyed stare that he
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