say a word.”
Cole squeezed his shoulder. “Thanks.” He glanced at Abel. “It’ll be over soon. Then you two can relax. Until tomorrow, anyway.” Tomorrow it would be Devlin’s turn on the stand.
♦
W hy the hell did you ask him if he still loved you?
The question beat at Horatio’s mind until it was bruised and his head began to ache. Being around Max, it was tearing him apart at the seams. And allowing himself to delve back into that memory of their first time making love – that had been a huge mistake. Everything was still too vivid: Max’s pleas for Horatio to say he loved him, to promise he would always love him, his insistence that he couldn’t live without Horatio, couldn’t breathe without him.
Horatio closed his eyes. A lump formed thick in his throat. He wanted to cry and despised himself for it. Please, God, don’t let me break down. Not here, not now . But he felt dangerously close to doing just that. The warmth of Max’s body brushing against him only weakened him all the more. It hadn’t been so long since he’d been in Max’s bed, in his arms, savoring the man’s passion for him. And he didn’t know how not to want it again.
He shuddered when Seth slipped his hand into Horatio’s and squeezed gently. Oh God, Seth, I don’t deserve you, baby. You should have turned me down when I asked you to come with me again. You should have run far away from me. I am so fucked up .
Horatio responded and wrapped his fingers around Seth’s hand, then leaned over and pressed his face into Seth’s hair. “When we get back to the penthouse,” Horatio whispered, his voice thick, strained, “I want to make love to you all night long.”
Lifting his head, Seth looked at him. There was a quiet anguish in his beautiful eyes. He wanted Horatio to love him for him ...and not because he reminded him of a younger Max. But Horatio had already confessed to him that that was what had drawn him in the first place, his resemblance to the “Max” who had loved him openly. Seth had even allowed him to call him Max while they’d made love, and Horatio had done so. But that was before he and Seth had decided there was something more between them. Now all of that was coming back on them, no doubt crashing in on Seth as he saw the way Horatio still looked at Max, the longing and desire in him for the other man.
But Seth voiced none of it as he leaned against Horatio, laying his head on his shoulder, confessing quietly, “I want that too.”
Horatio kissed his hair and let his lips linger, his vision blurring. Why was it the innocent ones who always seemed to suffer the most?
Chapter 10
“Truth of the Matter”
♦
H is mind went numb the moment he was called to the stand. His own voice sounded far away when he swore to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth – so help me, God . Abel’s hands shook and squeezed into fists in his lap behind the witness stand. He was thankful he didn’t have to try and stand on his feet while he gave his testimony; he didn’t think he could have managed that. Nausea churned his guts, and he wondered if he would make it through this without vomiting.
Devlin caught his eye and held his stare for a moment. The love and support emanating out from the man calmed him somewhat. His greatest fear about today wasn’t in having to tell what had happened to him, but in having Devlin and Savannah hear it. But Devlin knew what to expect, and he now knew what his brother had been. He was there for Abel; he was on Abel’s side. He wasn’t in the courtroom today to challenge the truth of Abel’s testimony, but to support it and back it up.
I love you, baby, Abel told him silently, his throat aching. I’m so sorry you have to hear this .
When his gaze slid over to Gabe and Cole, another wave of calm settled over him, his guardian angels – who would break into prison if they had to, just to be with him, protect him. His eyes rested on Gabe for a moment; they
Cole squeezed his shoulder. “Thanks.” He glanced at Abel. “It’ll be over soon. Then you two can relax. Until tomorrow, anyway.” Tomorrow it would be Devlin’s turn on the stand.
♦
W hy the hell did you ask him if he still loved you?
The question beat at Horatio’s mind until it was bruised and his head began to ache. Being around Max, it was tearing him apart at the seams. And allowing himself to delve back into that memory of their first time making love – that had been a huge mistake. Everything was still too vivid: Max’s pleas for Horatio to say he loved him, to promise he would always love him, his insistence that he couldn’t live without Horatio, couldn’t breathe without him.
Horatio closed his eyes. A lump formed thick in his throat. He wanted to cry and despised himself for it. Please, God, don’t let me break down. Not here, not now . But he felt dangerously close to doing just that. The warmth of Max’s body brushing against him only weakened him all the more. It hadn’t been so long since he’d been in Max’s bed, in his arms, savoring the man’s passion for him. And he didn’t know how not to want it again.
He shuddered when Seth slipped his hand into Horatio’s and squeezed gently. Oh God, Seth, I don’t deserve you, baby. You should have turned me down when I asked you to come with me again. You should have run far away from me. I am so fucked up .
Horatio responded and wrapped his fingers around Seth’s hand, then leaned over and pressed his face into Seth’s hair. “When we get back to the penthouse,” Horatio whispered, his voice thick, strained, “I want to make love to you all night long.”
Lifting his head, Seth looked at him. There was a quiet anguish in his beautiful eyes. He wanted Horatio to love him for him ...and not because he reminded him of a younger Max. But Horatio had already confessed to him that that was what had drawn him in the first place, his resemblance to the “Max” who had loved him openly. Seth had even allowed him to call him Max while they’d made love, and Horatio had done so. But that was before he and Seth had decided there was something more between them. Now all of that was coming back on them, no doubt crashing in on Seth as he saw the way Horatio still looked at Max, the longing and desire in him for the other man.
But Seth voiced none of it as he leaned against Horatio, laying his head on his shoulder, confessing quietly, “I want that too.”
Horatio kissed his hair and let his lips linger, his vision blurring. Why was it the innocent ones who always seemed to suffer the most?
Chapter 10
“Truth of the Matter”
♦
H is mind went numb the moment he was called to the stand. His own voice sounded far away when he swore to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth – so help me, God . Abel’s hands shook and squeezed into fists in his lap behind the witness stand. He was thankful he didn’t have to try and stand on his feet while he gave his testimony; he didn’t think he could have managed that. Nausea churned his guts, and he wondered if he would make it through this without vomiting.
Devlin caught his eye and held his stare for a moment. The love and support emanating out from the man calmed him somewhat. His greatest fear about today wasn’t in having to tell what had happened to him, but in having Devlin and Savannah hear it. But Devlin knew what to expect, and he now knew what his brother had been. He was there for Abel; he was on Abel’s side. He wasn’t in the courtroom today to challenge the truth of Abel’s testimony, but to support it and back it up.
I love you, baby, Abel told him silently, his throat aching. I’m so sorry you have to hear this .
When his gaze slid over to Gabe and Cole, another wave of calm settled over him, his guardian angels – who would break into prison if they had to, just to be with him, protect him. His eyes rested on Gabe for a moment; they
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